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Leonidos
Reviews
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
Great movie and my theory on it's #1 ranking
I don't really have a lot to say about this movie beyond the fact that I did think it was quite enjoyable and very good. However as many before me have said I don't think I would consider this the best movie ever made and here is my theory as to its ranking: The past oh say, 2 decades or so, has been an age of horrible incompetence on the part of the movie industry as a whole. So as a result when the occasional competently made film like Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Memento, or Lord of The Rings comes out its greatness gets somewhat blown out of proportion, because it's the only movie around at the time that's even decent. Then if it IS good enough to be considered a "great" film it ends up in the top 10 of all time when instead it should be in the top 10 of the last 5 years.
Pearl Harbor (2001)
Shouldn't this movie have been ABOUT Pearl Harbor?
When I first saw the trailers for this movie I thought it was probably going to be great. It looked like a Saving Private Ryan level movie about Pearl Harbor rather than the Normandy invasion. Boy was I wrong. In a 3 hour movie we have about 40 minutes dealing with the attack. O.K. I wasn't expecting one long battle scene but the actual battle is the only part that has ANYTHING to do with the attack at all. Except for the American attack at the end, the rest of the movie is just a love story/romance novel. Simply as a movie it really wasn't bad at all. The problem is that if you title your movie "Pearl Harbor" you might want to actually deal with Pearl Harbor. This movie was merely SET in Pearl Harbor.
The Matrix (1999)
Decent movie even if an obvious ripoff...
The first time I saw this movie I was not greatly impressed. I had been hearing about it from all my friends and how unbelievably awesome it was and I think I got my expectations up a little too high. However after successive viewings it has definately gotten better and the special effects were probably about the best I have ever seen. The only problem is that if this movie wasn't a rip-off of Dark City (which was also excellent) then it is one of the most amazing coincidinces in history.
(spoilers) A few similarities:
Both films feature a hero with superhuman abilities that doesn't realize his full power untill almost the very end.
Both heros live in a completely artificial world.
Both heros are menaced by beings that all look basically alike and human but something isn't quite right...
Both heros are assisted by shadowy figures who seem to know the whole truth.
Both heros have a climactic battle with the leader of the aforementioned beings using the superhuman powers which they share.
Both of them get the girl (but I don't guess we really count THAT)
These are just what spring immediately to mind but go watch both of these and you will be able to draw quite simple and clear parralles.
That having been said I did still enjoy the Matrix. I give it an 8 out of 10.
Troll 2 (1990)
BWA HA HA HA HA!!! he-he he-he GWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!
I don't know why everyone else says this is the worst movie ever made. There's no way! This is clearly the SECOND worst movie ever made just behind "Manos: The Hands of Fate."
(spoilers) (like it matters)
That having been said OH MY GOD! I find it difficult to believe that this movie was actually made by adults! There is just no way anyone over 12 could have concieved of plot devices so incredibly ludicrous! "Family exchange program"??!!?? What the hell is that!!??!! And why doesn't anyone find the food that turns you into Goblin food (that's right Goblins! No Trolls here!) strange? Oh! green corn on the cob with green butter and a big glass of unrefridgerated green milk! My favorite! Who can leave out the special effects? Oh where do I begin!!??!! For some reason the goblins seem to be very fond of burlap sacks and work gloves because that's what they all wear and apparently their normal goblin faces aren't scary enough so they all have on $2 Halloween masks from Wal-Mart. I'd say the special effects that went into the box cover were much better than any that appeared in the actual movie. The cover has a kid on some stone stairs being menaced by a large werewolf looking monster carrying a huge battle axe. Nothing from that cover (including the kid) appears in the movie!
Now that I've said all that I would like to say SEE THIS MOVIE! It is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen! Not good for the people who made it since this was supposed to be a straight horror feature but good for the audience! Mystery Science Theater 3000 never had it so good! (with the exception of the aforementioned Manos) The whole thing is one long SNL lampoon of horror movies! (but it wasn't supposed to be)
As a movie .2 out of 10, for being fun to watch an 8!
Interceptors (1999)
Predator 3! Well sorta....
The actual overall movie wasn't too bad in of itself but it is terrible compared to the predator movies. It has almost the exact same plot as the original Predator. A group of special-forces types are sent in on a bogus mission and start getting picked off by an alien who can turn invisible. The worst part of this rip-off is that they didn't even attempt to hide the fact that they ripped the whole thing off. The most obvious thing being that whenever the view switches to the alien's point of view they used the EXACT SAME sound effects!! If you've never seen Predator a 5 out of 10 if you have... 2.
A Christmas Story (1983)
This movie is AWFUL!
Why is this movie considered a classic? I had always heard so much about it so I decided to rent it. I sat there stupified at the sheer badness, and unfunniness of the entire movie. It's one big corn ball from start to finish. With the exception of a couple of mildly amusing one liners this is possibly the lamest movie ever made.
2 out of 10 because only the worst dreks recieve a 1.
The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
Wasn't there some kind of book at one point?
**SPOILERS**One of my biggest complaints with this movie was the tagline "Something has survived." So? Why wouldn't something have survived? As I recall at the end of Jurassic Park everyone just evacuates the island and leaves the dinosaurs to themselves so of course something has survived. Now if you read the book where they bomb the island back to the stone age (no pun intended) it would make sense that everything should have been dead. Then they go on to tell us that it was based on Michael Crichton's book. Could someone please tell me which parts? (spoilers) First of all the opening scene where the girl gets attacked by the compys is actually the beginning to the FIRST book. What was up with that? Then when we get into the plot the ONLY character that even remotely resembled his character from the book was Ian Malcolm. The rest of the characters were either one character's name transplanted onto another's personality or completely made up for the movie such as the ENTIRE expedition that was attempting to capture live dinosaurs. Then at the end that whole T-Rex rampage through town, what moron thought that would be a good idea? Another element that never happend in the book. O.K. I understand that movies are basically never exactly like the book, but shouldn't there have been at least ONE scene from the book included in the movie? The only one I can remember is the T-Rexs kicking the trailers off the cliff and the kicking of the trailers was the only thing about that scene that was correct nothing else. One last question: What was the high hide hanging from?
"Gentleman, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!"
The Rock (1996)
My favorite action movie of all time.
At first glance and especially according to it's trailer The Rock appears at first to be the generic shoot-em-up, explosion laden, Swiss-cheese plot, mindless action film. Fortunately, why there is no shortage of action, the film spends enough time with it's characters that is also a half way decent movie. Nicholas Cage is an FBI chemical weapons specialist. Sean Connery is the British SAS officer who once escaped from the famed prison. Ed Harris is the Marine general who is tired of his men being ignored by the Pentagon. (possible spoilers ahead) Major Hummel (Harris), with the aid of some Marines, hijacks a bunch of chemical weapons rockets which he then places on Alcatraz island with the cover of a large number of tourist hostages. Stanley Goodspeed (Cage) is called in for his expertise and John Mason (Connery)is given a reprieve from his 30 year prison sentence due to his extensive knowledge of the island prison's inner sanctum. From here the story moves through mason's short escape from custody, but just long enough to visit his long-lost daughter. Michael Biehn, my favorite underrated actor, makes an appearance as the leader of the SEAL team sent to free the prison. Even though the SEAL's are predictably wiped out it is done quite plausibly and Mason and Goodspeed become a mismatched duo that is all that stands between Hummel's rockets and San Francisco. The rest of the movie is Goodspeed and Mason running around fighting off Marines and disabling rockets. While we don't agree with his methods the audience (and even the SEAL commander) sympathize with Hummel. All in all a fun movie with great action sequences that manages to maintain plausibility and a decent plot.
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!"
Independence Day (1996)
great fun if minus realism
This was one of my favorite movies of the year. It had lots of great effects and the action sequences are great. Will Smith was his usual self funny and entertaining. While the realism may be a little hard to take, (spoilers) laptops compatible with alien technology a virus drummed up in a couple days that can disable the ships etc. It wasn't really meant to be taken as an extremely scientifically accurate movie. Just a fun alien invasion movie where humanity has to come together and fight off the aggressors, a little over-used subject maybe but what isn't these days? At any rate this rehash was pulled off very well. One thing I would like to say though is to all those posting complaints about the Americans always find the answer. This is a movie about Americans made for Americans so why would they go all that way and then have say, to pull a country out of the hat, the British win it for them? (no slight to the British intended at all in that) That would be stupid! I'm not an expert on foreign films but I doubt there are a lot of British films that show German's winning it or French films that have Spaniards winning so I think these "America always seems to do it" arguments are rather unfair, especially for a film such as this one which is a work of total fiction.
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!"
Exotica (1994)
could some tell me what was going on?
I rented this movie after a friend told me about it. I was about half way through when I decided to use a new rule of thumb I had just made up for this movie: if I've watched half the movie and still have no idea what the plot is then it goes out the window.
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
A great fun film.
This has to be one of my favorite comedies of all time. While there are really very few laugh out loud hilarious moments in this movie it is still great. (possible spoilers) Ferris is the most popular Senior in school who decides to take the day off. He semi-bullies his best friend Cameron into joining him and then breaks his girlfriend out of school. They spend the rest of the day eating at fine restaurants, going to a Cubs game, visiting an Art gallery, and generally a lot of things you wouldn't expect the average teen to do on a day of skipped school. Despite their somewhat dry sounding itinerary, Ferris and company still have lots of fun and do take time to do some wild and crazy things. The principal Mr. Rooney is hilarious at his horribly inept attempts to catch Ferris. All in all a wonderfully fun movie and one of the best films of the 80's.
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!"
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
Brilliant dark comedy
How can I describe this movie? I'm not sure I can, but I'll try. This has to be my favorite dark comedy hands down. Not only is it hilarious but I have never seen any other movie that highlights the futility of war so aptly. Peter Sellers is brilliant in his triple role of the President, Dr. Strangelove, and a British Officer desperately trying to stop the oncoming armeggedon. This movie has some of the most memorable quotes in all filmdom including my personal favorite. (you'll find it at the bottom of almost all my posts) Highly recommended to anyone with a sense of humor.
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!"
Dark City (1998)
excellent
I just recently saw this movie for the first time and wow. The mood is somewhat dark but it only enhances the feel of the movie. The one thing I must say is that the makers of The Matrix must have had this movie at the front of their mind when they wrote their script.
SPOILERS!
The hero has special powers but doesn't know it.
He is pursued by powerful beings who all look basically alike and have the same special powers.
The city that is the world for all the people living in it is a total fabrication.
The strange beings keep the humans as unwitting prisoners so they can expierament on them without their knowledge.
The hero gets help from a shadowy person who seems to know everything.
The hero and the leader of the beings who run the city have a climactic battle using the strange powers they both have.
Batman & Robin (1997)
zzzzzzzzzzzzz
In all but the best movies there is usually at least one person horribly miscast i.e. Glenn Close in Air Force One, Jake Lloyd in the Phantom Menace etc.
This is the only movie I have ever seen where EVERYBODY was miscast. I'm a fan of both Clooney and Arnold but they were just plain wrong for their roles. Clooney played his characters perfectly in From Dusk til Dawn and Three Kings but he just couldn't pull off the rather dark moody Batman/Bruce Wayne. Arnold plays a great action star and was perfect in the Terminator movies but Mr. Freeze is supposed to be a brilliant scientist in mourning for his wife. The Mr. Freeze portrayed by the fairly recent animated series is one of the best villains of all time and could have been brilliantly duplicated by Patrick Stewart but alas. Alicia Silverstone is miscast in any role outside of Clueless and Chris O'Donnell should be permanently banned from action movies. Uma Thurman probably could have pulled off the Poison Ivy role but the script for the character was just stupid and what the hell was up with the hairdo? Also annoying was the superstrong hitman character from the comic book Bane who was reworked into a totally unnecessary and brainless henchman for Ivy that barely even appears. in the end the only person that accomplishes what he needed to in his role was Michael Gough as Alfred doing his usual excellent job as the wise butler that he filled in the previous 3 movies. All in all 2 out of 10 because just being Batman is worth a 2 instead of a 1.
Patriot Games (1992)
good until the end
I would probably have liked this better if I had never read the book. I first got interested in Clancy after I saw the movie Clear and Present Danger. Both Clear and Present and The Hunt for Red October are excellent adaptations and include as much as realistically possible considering the length of the books.
Patriot Games was good and very loyal to the original story until the end. Since I had already read the book I absolutely HATED the ending. It was fine as a stand alone but it was completely different from the book's ending. I wouldn't have minded them changing the ending except the book's was MUCH better and could have been used as is just as easily. Instead the filmmakers obviously didn't like how Jack Ryan handled the terrorists in the final confrontation and decided to monkey with things- badly. Despite that still a fairly good thriller.
Charlie's Angels (2000)
As long as you don't know anything and don't think it's really cool
0 for realism and logic but a 10 for hot chicks and action. My only other comment (because that says it all) is why does everyone think they have to copy that scene from the Matrix where the Agent and Neo jump around and shoot at each other and they both miss. It made sense in the Matrix because they were in the Matrix but in the 82 other movies I've seen it in since then it just looked stupid
Saving Private Ryan (1998)
Easily the greatest war movie ever and in my opinion the greatest movie ever
While I may be a bit prejudiced on the subject, since I consider myself a WWII buff, this is by far the greatest movie I have ever seen. While the extremely graphic violence is not for the faint of heart it is done with a frightening degree of accuracy and that is a large part of what makes this movie truly great. The fact that it was denied the Best Picture Academy Award is a crime.
Tom Hanks was wonderful as the leader of the small band of men in search of a missing paratrooper. His performance was by no means bad but I personally do not believe it was impressive enough to earn him the Oscar. Or perhaps to be more fair it was not as impressive as some of the other work done in the same year.
SPR is a blueprint for how to make a truly wonderful what I would call a "fictional documentary." (based in fact but with a fictional plot line)
The most telling moment for me was the first time I saw this film in the theater. When the final scene faded out and the credits rolled there was total silence. Not a single person in the packed theater uttered a single word and for a few moments no one even moved. Then, slowly, everyone quietly stood and left. This is the only movie I know that has left an entire audience totally speechless. Probably because Mr. Spielberg had already said everything there was to say.