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Reviews
Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal (2001)
HA!
It's movies like these that become camp classics. It should have been called Marilyn Manson Vs. Airplane 1975. Ok, so, this "rocker" who looks a lot like a Crow reject and his band decide to webcast an concert aboard a 747 at 35,000 feet, complete with thunder and fog special effects during the show. He brings along his number one fans (who all look like the clearance rack at Hot Topic attacked them) Then satantic terrorists hijack the concert in order to crash the plane into the plains of Kansas (!). Mr. Rocker must then save the day by landing the plane, all while keeping his Crow makeup from smearing, while the "gothic" passengers scream and cry all the way home.
Where the hell is Karen Black when you need her?
Cause for Concern (2002)
Disgusting, Cruel, Inhuman
I'm a fan of shock cinema. I like digusting, gory, cruel movies that take horrible images and drive them into your skull. I also like documentries, many serving a valuable purpose in exposing issues that are often ignored.
Bumfights, however, is not a documentry. It is not "shock cinema". It is a group of inhumane monsters in their early 20's who apparently think it's a funny to attack homeless people while they're sleeping, tie them up, and spray paint them.
This is not funny--it's evidence of assault & battery.
Ripley's Believe It or Not! (1982)
This show used the scare the hell out of me
Because I was so young, half the bits never made sense to me. I remember this one story on an artist who made very life-like sculptures of people. They showed him doing the lifecasts, and my young mind thought this was about people who voluntarily allowed themselves to be encased in plaster and die and become mannequins. I was scared of this show and of mannequins for quite awhile after that.
Believe it...or not!
Wrong Turn (2003)
It's digusting--GOOD! It's just a stupid horror movie, that's why!
This was just what I needed: A few campers lost in the woods, a couple of axes, a few arrows. Blood, guts, inbred weirdos. No self-referential humor. You could call this a "classically trained slasher film". I really liked that the filmmakers didn't try to fool me with the pretense that I was watching anything more than that. I also liked that for the first time in American horror since the early 80's we get the red stuff tossed around real good.
This is the movie "House of 1000 Corpses" probably should have been.
Family Feud (1999)
Bring Back the Old Set
It's not the format that's off...I can even deal with Louie Anderson, but folks, it's not the feud without a large revolving board that flips answers and dings. The set just revolting, and claustrophobic looking. I can't watch it with that animated graphic survey board. It ruins the whole show for me. I know it's probably done to keep the show on a budget and keep it cheap. Well congratulations...'cuz that's just how it looks.