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Reviews
The Requin (2022)
utter rubbush
Acting was appaling, Story was appaling, CGI was appaling, Wouldn't even waste someboy elses time on this rubbish. If i could go for a -1 star then I'd give it -4.
WarHunt (2022)
Made for TV?
Felt very much like a made for TV film. The FX were pretty naff CGI, Didn't really potray any kind of dark foreboding. The kind of thing you would find on a second rate horror channel.
A Banquet (2021)
and the point is?
Started slow and got slower as time went on. Seems like a pointless film to me. Doesn't entertain, doesn't provoke thought, doesn't provoke fear. Doesn't achieve anything, much better films out there, Next....
Ted K (2021)
RUBBISH
Tries to protray the man as a pervert and a climate activist, absolute rubbish. Wouldn't waste my time on this propoganda. Just more historical distortion to fit the narrative of today. Try actually reading books before watching this awful representation.
Last Night in Soho (2021)
great fun film
Enjoyed this. Nice to see an original film making some headway, makes a massive change from the paint by numbers, formulaic crap hollywood churns out.
Psycho Goreman (2020)
young teenage horror film
Made for young teenagers, pretty childish. The young Girl is absolutely annoying, but the actress does play it very very well. Awesome to see stop motion animation. The FX were well done and suitable for the 80's horror syle of the film. Whilst i didn't really enjoy it. I'm sure a young teen would love it and it was well done.
Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)
made for profit
Another film taking the piss out of the paying public. Pointless rubbish made for profit and doesn't involve anything creative, orginal or worth watching. Probably made by bots.
Slashlorette Party (2020)
a homage to 80's flicks
Re-creating that 80's slasher vibe is mostly well done. The acting isn't as bad as it could be. As a modern film, its not that great. If you like 80's slasher flicks then this might be worth it if you have time to kill. Otherwise probably best save your time for something a little less rubbish.
Tony (2009)
great british darkness
Dark, funny and painful. Well worth a watch, if you like gritty british films, this is for you.
Mentally Apart (2020)
its pretty dull
I'm assuimng the 10/10 are all from either friends or makers of this film. Its didn't hold my attention, it wasn't a pyscholigical mind melt, it was in fact pretty dull, I switched it off after an hour of painful waiting for something to grab my enquiring mind. I'd skip this one if youi've read that this is a twisted mind warp, its not!
Ghosts of Darkness (2017)
if hammer horror used their 70's skills
If hammer horror used their 70's skills this is the film you would end up with. Pretty dull really.
Dark Encounter (2019)
pointless waste of time
Alice Lowe is normally brilliant. Sadly this is absolute rubbish. Don't waste your hour and a half, perhaps watch some paint dry. It'll be more intersting.
It Comes at Night (2017)
boring
If there was an award for the most over the top attempt at atmosphere, this would win. Its just incredibly boring and the atmosphere of paranoia is way too much, so much so that it became annoying. Next.
Dirty Fears (2020)
rubbish
Watched about ten minutes of this, it made no sense and was about as watchable as a nuclear explosion. next
In the Tall Grass (2019)
boring ripoff of lost
Lost was awful and nonsense and this being a ripoff of lost is doubly rubbish, wouldn't waste your time
Host (2020)
ok
Blair witch with a hefty dose of paranormal activity. this film would have got a 5 if it wasn't for the unsubtle government sponsored propoganda.
Classroom 6 (2015)
not great
If this was a college project or an exercise in copying the Blair witch for uni then for an amateur its not a bad attempt. If its a commercial release then shame on you. Its a poor mans rip-off of the original blair witch project. the acting is poor, the casting is poor and the scares are a really rubbish attempt at hiding the fact you are copying other better films. Wouldn't waste my hour and half if i were you
Tenet (2020)
boring
Dull and boring. nothing grabbed me. switched it off after an hour because the paint drying on my walls became more appealing
The Special (2020)
cracking little horror film
Original, dark and funny. the acting was a tiny bit wooden at times, but personally i think it adds to the overall ambience of a dcecent dark horror film.. Well worth an hour and a half of your time if your sick an tired of cliched, made for money, genric horror flicks and want something that takes you back to when horror was full of originality and humour
T2 Trainspotting (2017)
Why did you bother?
The first being awesome should have been followed by something equally awesome. But no..................................... Should have stuck to the plot the books take. Why the writer of this believes he/she is clearly better then Mr Welsh, the author is beyond me. There really was no need to create an entirely new storyline. Ok for the sake of a film, certain things may need to have artistic or creative license, but to almost completely create a new story without any homage to the original plot the books take is just an ego trip IMO. This film isn't funny, it doesn't have any real iconic soundtrack apart from the end track! and smacks of an exercise in money making at the expense of a film that should have been a million times better. Personally I'd avoid this rubbish because i wouldn't want it to taint the brilliant first film.
Momo: The Missouri Monster (2019)
Doesn't work
Why was this even made? The Narrator was really irritating and the mock 70's film was a poor attempt at comedy. don't waste your time
Ouija Shark (2020)
Errrmm
I'm assuming this is a first attempt for these guys, because if its not, they probably need to choose a new career. Lets assume its a first try, in which case this isn't in the realms of awful. The acting wasn't as bad as some. It did have a laugh or two. The shark was possibly the worst movie shark in history. The story was truly dreadful, but I'd guess this wasn't meant to be high brow entertainment. Overall not worth your time, but for a first journey into comedy horror for the creators, I'd say keep plugging away, there are far worse films out there
Brahms: The Boy II (2020)
about as scary as a fart in a spacesuit
Unoriginal paint by numbers amercian horror. Desparately trying to be English, but fails miserably. This is not an exercise in creative and imaginative film making, its yet another cynical attempt to part you from your money. Stop giving crap like this the oxygen it desires and instead support original and creative film makers.
Beneath (2013)
hhhhmmmm
Story was initially ok for a rubbery horror. Acting was bloody awful, overacted and underacted and everything in between, location was a joke, lake only seemed about 50ft wide in most shots. the only reason this doesn't get a zero is because the fish was actually pretty well done. Shame because the rest was not woth my hour and a half