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longshanks
Reviews
Ishtar (1987)
Horrible
I'm the kind of person who often likes "bad" movies because, even though they aren't very good, they're often cheesy enough to be entertaining and enjoyable. This is not one of those enjoyable bad movies. This one is just plain awful. I rented it with low expectations, knowing the reputation it had, but had an open mind. Well, it fell far below even those low expectations. I don't think I laughed once, either at the intended jokes, or the stupidity of the movie. Instead, I just watched in pain at how they seriously seemed to think what they were doing was funny, but wasn't in the least. This has to be about the worst movie I've ever seen, with no redeeming qualities to it at all.
Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)
Not that good
I saw Goldmember on opening night last Friday, and I've been trying to figure out since then why I didn't think it was very good. Sure, there were some funny scenes, such as one that was reminiscent of the tent scene in Austin Powers 2. That was hilarious. So was a fight scene between Austin and Mini-Me. On the whole, however, this movie was basically a dud. One classic way of knowing it was a letdown: about half way through the movie, I noticed that I and the people around me were starting to get all squirmy, which is usually a pretty good indication that a movie doesn't have your complete attention.
So what was wrong? It's hard to say. Partly, I think it took itself too seriously. I saw some interviews with a couple of the cast members, including Mike Myers, and they all said how much fun they had making this movie. It doesn't show on screen. Nobody really seems to be having that good a time. In fact, the movie almost has a bit a mean streak in it. There also wasn't much chemistry between Myers and Beyonce Knowles, nothing like what Myers had with Elizabeth Hurley in the original, or with Heather Graham in The Spy Who Shagged Me. It was almost as if Myers was just tired of doing the whole Austin Powers thing, and couldn't bring himself to really get into character, or the movie. He doesn't even have the trademark bad teeth throughout most of the film. Maybe playing 4 roles was just too much for him.
As far as recommendations go, if you like the second Austin Powers movie better than the first, you might really like this one. Personally, I thought the original was by far the best one, much more lighthearted and silly, whereas the second one was a little too vulgar for my liking. If you disagree, then, like I said, maybe you'll really like Goldmember. It's a tough call.
The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course (2002)
Disappointing
I'm a pretty big fan of the Crocodile Hunter, I watch both the regular Crocodile Hunter show and Crocodile Hunter Diaries just about every week (on Animal Planet, not Discovery Channel as is often reported, though Discovery does own Animal Planet). Anyhow, I was hesitant about dropping 8 bucks on the movie, because it did look kind of corny, especially since I can see the show for free on TV. But, since most of the reviews, professional and from fans, were good, I figured I'd go see it. Well, there were only about 25 people at the showing I went to, which was on opening night, and about three quarters of the way through, a group of 4 people walked out, and a few minutes later, a couple more people left, if that tells you anything. I think the problem was, and this might be surprising, is that it was too serious. Sure, it was kind of silly, but only in the same way he is on TV, so it wasn't really funny. It just seemed like every opportunity for a funny scene was wasted. For example, when the croc hunter finds some goanna poop, it could have been very funny. Instead, it was treated almost as seriously as it would have been on the show. I think it should have been a little more self-mocking and done more to poke fun at Steve's image as a crazy Aussie. Honestly, this would have been better as a movie on Animal Planet, rather than a Summer movie at the movies. If you're really interested in seeing this movie, I would recommend waiting until it comes out on video or dvd, and save yourself a few bucks, or just watch the TV show, since it's basically the same thing.