I don't know how they surpassed it as a worse movie, but somehow, they managed.
"Shark Night" is, without a doubt, the worst shark movie I've ever seen, and I've seen plenty of bad ones. "Shark Night" is worse than "Shark Attack 3: Megalodon." It makes "Megashark vs. Giant Octopus" look like high art. To quote Steve Martin in "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles," it's not even amusing accidentally.
The "surprises" were all just one big barrel of "duh" from start to finish. They were cliché even for clichés. Let's see: two guys speeding through a shark-infested lake on a jet ski... hmm, wonder wonder if they're going to make it. A boat gets rocked with someone sitting on the side; no sir, never saw that coming. A caged woman tries to seduce her captor - whoa, that was completely out of left field!
One of the things that had me laughing out loud the most had to be the "acting." Between Sara Paxton's robotic mouthing of her lines and Dustin Milligan's late reactions, I can't decide who was worse. I mean yeah, nobody goes to horror films besides something along the lines of "Alien" or "Silence of the Lambs" to see excellent performances, but honestly, these two made Chuck Norris look like a thespian. The only real talent in this movie probably belonged to Joel David Moore and Joshua Leonard, both of whom should have handed the script back after one glance at it.
Another of the things that had me laughing out loud was the dialogue. For example, Nick passes out, and the sheriff says he "thinks" he fainted. That wasn't obvious enough? Did the sheriff also "think" that Sara was wearing a bikini? Did he "think" they were at a lake house?
But the absolute worst part of this movie had to be the fact that it was rated PG-13. Let's think about this for a minute; it's a horror film, for starters. Furthermore, it's a horror film about sharks, which means there's going to be plenty of carnage. Well, let's just say that there SHOULD have been plenty of carnage. The level of violence in this movie made a pimple look like a bite from a brown recluse spider. Why are so many directors trying to "appeal to younger audiences" by toning down everything? It's a HORROR FILM! Horror films are supposed to appeal to adults! Why don't you just have Disney make an animated "Saw" movie, for God's sake? They didn't even have the decency to release it unrated on DVD!
Oh, and speaking of PG-13, you know how it says "for brief nudity" among other things? Just a warning to all the guys out there who thought that may be some kind of compensation for this chum bucket of a movie; it isn't, though you ladies may find it to be mild compensation.
You'd think David R. Ellis and company would know better after giving us a decent first sequel to "Final Destination," but no... and, sadly, "Shark Night 3D" was his last film. Even "Snakes on a Plane" had its moments of entertainment, at least compared to this. But "Shark Night" seriously has to be the most one-dimensional three-dimensional film ever released. It's almost as if they had a shark type the script.
And speaking of sharks, here's one final little tidbit of trivia I'd like to repeat for the millionth time in as many shark movies: SHARKS DON'T HAVE VOCAL CORDS. That's right; they can't roar, they can't growl, they pretty much can't do anything with their mouths but bite. And biting is the one thing that "Shark Night" does best.
"Shark Night" is, without a doubt, the worst shark movie I've ever seen, and I've seen plenty of bad ones. "Shark Night" is worse than "Shark Attack 3: Megalodon." It makes "Megashark vs. Giant Octopus" look like high art. To quote Steve Martin in "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles," it's not even amusing accidentally.
The "surprises" were all just one big barrel of "duh" from start to finish. They were cliché even for clichés. Let's see: two guys speeding through a shark-infested lake on a jet ski... hmm, wonder wonder if they're going to make it. A boat gets rocked with someone sitting on the side; no sir, never saw that coming. A caged woman tries to seduce her captor - whoa, that was completely out of left field!
One of the things that had me laughing out loud the most had to be the "acting." Between Sara Paxton's robotic mouthing of her lines and Dustin Milligan's late reactions, I can't decide who was worse. I mean yeah, nobody goes to horror films besides something along the lines of "Alien" or "Silence of the Lambs" to see excellent performances, but honestly, these two made Chuck Norris look like a thespian. The only real talent in this movie probably belonged to Joel David Moore and Joshua Leonard, both of whom should have handed the script back after one glance at it.
Another of the things that had me laughing out loud was the dialogue. For example, Nick passes out, and the sheriff says he "thinks" he fainted. That wasn't obvious enough? Did the sheriff also "think" that Sara was wearing a bikini? Did he "think" they were at a lake house?
But the absolute worst part of this movie had to be the fact that it was rated PG-13. Let's think about this for a minute; it's a horror film, for starters. Furthermore, it's a horror film about sharks, which means there's going to be plenty of carnage. Well, let's just say that there SHOULD have been plenty of carnage. The level of violence in this movie made a pimple look like a bite from a brown recluse spider. Why are so many directors trying to "appeal to younger audiences" by toning down everything? It's a HORROR FILM! Horror films are supposed to appeal to adults! Why don't you just have Disney make an animated "Saw" movie, for God's sake? They didn't even have the decency to release it unrated on DVD!
Oh, and speaking of PG-13, you know how it says "for brief nudity" among other things? Just a warning to all the guys out there who thought that may be some kind of compensation for this chum bucket of a movie; it isn't, though you ladies may find it to be mild compensation.
You'd think David R. Ellis and company would know better after giving us a decent first sequel to "Final Destination," but no... and, sadly, "Shark Night 3D" was his last film. Even "Snakes on a Plane" had its moments of entertainment, at least compared to this. But "Shark Night" seriously has to be the most one-dimensional three-dimensional film ever released. It's almost as if they had a shark type the script.
And speaking of sharks, here's one final little tidbit of trivia I'd like to repeat for the millionth time in as many shark movies: SHARKS DON'T HAVE VOCAL CORDS. That's right; they can't roar, they can't growl, they pretty much can't do anything with their mouths but bite. And biting is the one thing that "Shark Night" does best.
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