vqld Reviews

The Grudge (2004)

worst movie of the genre ever made

[1/10 · 15 February 2007]

This movie is laughably bad.

Before you watch this movie ask yourself: "do I like predictable buildups, such as slow deliberate walking into "creepy" environments followed by loud noises intended to "shock" the viewer" "do I get scared by 5 year old kids wearing too much eyeshadow that meow like cats" If you answered yes to those questions than this is the movie for you! For the rest of us, this movie was the epitome of silliness. If you must watch it, watch the rifftrax version where Mike Nelson makes fun of it because it is actually enjoyable then. To know that this movie received a 5 on here, as well as doing well enough in the box office to elicit a sequel makes me weep for the idiotic masses. I guess teenage girls make up a significant portion of the public...

See No Evil (2006)

Bad

[1/10 · 14 February 2007]

After watching this movie, I have nothing but contempt for any of those who were involved in the making of this abysmal film. For one, as a general comment, the storyline was literally unbelievable and filled with incredible clichés all around. The same obviously goes for the dialogue which panders to the lowest common denominator and manages to offer absolutely zero unpredictable original lines. The acting was terrible as well with Kane showing, throughout the entire movie, at the very most 3 separate and distinct emotions. Even the use of modern special effects failed, as each prop was easily distinguishable from its real life counterpart. Overall, I would not recommend for anyone to even think about viewing this feature, as it will most surely waste 83(not even 90!) minutes of your life.