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Reviews
The Rockville Slayer (2004)
Can't be spoiled because the story is unintelligible
Someone below said that this film insults real rubbish. That line is funnier & more interesting than anything that appears on screen in this unending and unendurable "movie." There is a lot of people on screen coming and going and saying stuff but no one does or says anything interesting and you never even know who the hero is supposed to be until the end of the movie when there are only two characters left on screen. I guess that's the writer/director's way of telling you who you were supposed to be rooting for all along. I could tell you everything that happens from start to finish (murder, red herrings, late-entering characters trying to add some twists, and a limp cop who would be better cast as Ichabod Crane instead of a policeman) and it couldn't spoil the story for you because you could never enjoy it in the first place. I don't think any of the actors who's name you might recognize have done a major film since this one. Perhaps Rockville slayed their careers. The actors you've never heard of before you will never hear from again. The shame of it all is that it looks like they threw a lot of money on the screen, production values are high. The problems are many: bad direction, bad self indulgent impenetrable story, bad acting, poor sound, and a very bad quality DVD release.
I Bury the Living (1958)
I'd bury this film
I wanted to see this film for many years thinking that the combination of a lurid plot device (a man who can decide who lives and dies by placing pins on a map), a great old actor (Richard Boone), and the cheesiness of the wave of 1950's horror genre would create a classic. Man, was I wrong.
The plot device is unique and for that reason alone this film deserves to be remade as a subtle intelligent horror film. But Richard Boone turned out to be the most uninteresting hero/antihero that I have ever seen in a horror film. He's not likable and he's not hate-able. He just happens to be the guy stuck in the middle of everything. You never care about him at all and you wouldn't care if he lives or dies. Such a disappointment from this otherwise worthy actor.
There is plenty of delicious cheesiness in the film with a map that looks like it comes to life at times and the low budget is always apparent but never intrusive. I would have really enjoyed the film if the central role had been changed.
They should remake this film with someone more appealing in the lead role and it could be a hit. Maybe a low key performance by Ed Begley, Jr. would do the trick.