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Thraeryn
Reviews
Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020)
The perfect capstone.
It's hard to imagine a better finale to the saga of Bill & Ted.
Watch the film. Try to imagine a better story that incorporates more callbacks, more of the good-natured silliness of Bill S. Preston and Ted "Theodore" Logan. They've always been kind-hearted dummies stumbling successfully through their troubles with a little help from their unexpected friends; this film takes that to its next level.
If you enjoy the characters, you'll enjoy the film.
People Just Do Nothing (2014)
Very English, very much a waste of my time
So, y'know that thing in comedy these days where awful people are so painfully well-written that they're not actually funny characters? Where, instead of being over-the-top, they're just the idiots that live 'round the corner, and all the situations are boring dross that could happen on a Tuesday?
Yeh. It's one of those. The BBC is trying to bolster the economy with them now that The Office has been so long off-air.
The essence of humor is the unexpected, and there's nothing unexpected about a bunch of bell-ends stumbling through a world of mundane cock-ups.
Braindead (1992)
Ugh.
If you loved Garbage Pail Kids trading cards, you'll probably think this film is absolutely hiiiiiiiii-larious.
I am not part of the intended audience for this film. Things that had the rest of the room chuckling and laughing had me ready to vomit all over Peter Jackson. If this movie is any indicator, my doing so would probably give Mr. Jackson a good belly laugh.
I really don't know how to describe the film. Let it suffice to say that every time I think about it, even for a moment, I wish I could go back in time and destroy my friend's DVD so I wouldn't have been subjected to the "comedy" of the movie. The images disgusted me. The story was insulting to all but the lowest intelligence. The "jokes" made me want to weep for humanity's sinking so low.
Here's hoping that one person sees this review and avoids the film. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
Magnolia (1999)
What in the world?!
Sorry, this comment will contain a few spoilers. It's my sincerest hope that, by the end, you won't want to watch this horrible film and will have lost nothing anyway. (It might even save you some lost time.) I was astounded to learn that "Magnolia" was written by one person. Watching the movie, I got the idea that the screenplay came about after a night of the old' "story game", where four or five friends sit in a circle and take up for the last person. The problem with THIS story circle, however, was that one guy had to bring along his obnoxious cousin: the one that everyone knows, the one that no one likes. We'll call him "Jimmy".
The story starts pretty well and everyone's having a good time, . . . and then it's Jimmy's turn. Whenever it's Jimmy's turn, the plot flies out the window and is replaced by utter nonsense. "Okay, so there's this new guy, and he's a woman hunter!!! Yeah! He's so good at hunting women, he gives seminars on it. He's interviewed for TV because he's so good at hunting women! The reporter tries to ask him dumb questions about his background, but he knows what's what and steers her back to what's important!" It only gets worse. Three characters, none of them in the same location, none of them with radios or television sets on, all start singing along with the movie's soundtrack. I don't want to share the ending, but if you were playing the story game and someone tried to foist this ending on you, you would throw your hands up and walk away in disgust. (Look it up elsewhere if you're curious.) There are several other moments in the film that made me shake my head and practically curse at the stupidity; I've managed to block them from my mind.
Aside from Jimmy's moments, the movie is arguably an enjoyable "slice of life" film. There's just no way to suspend one's disbelief when those moments roll around. I broke the DVD in half after watching this one.
The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)
Quality!
The Royal Tenenbaums is a quality film. The writing is as close to reality as I've ever seen in a film, and each and every actor takes that reality a step further until the viewer becomes immersed in the Tenenbaum family and their respective quirks. This is the best acting I've seen yet from Gene Hackman and Gwyneth Paltrow, and Owen Wilson continues to gain my respect as both an actor and a writer. See this film, become a part of the family, and don't be surprised by the range of emotions it'll run you through.