Sintek Reviews

Windtalkers (2002)

You mean this isn't a comedy?

[29 September 2004]

I'll not let this film take any more of my time except to say this: If you like parodies of bad war films like those featured at the awards in "Naked Gun 3" and "In & Out," watch "Windtalkers." You'll snicker when you're supposed to cry and chortle when the 2-dimensional characters find redemption and/or rid themselves of personal demons. This is the best comedy in years!

Drinking game suggestion: Drink every time you correctly guess the method by which a character will die - don't worry, they're all incredibly predictable; and since almost every character dies, you can get fairly well smashed.

Strangers with Candy (1999–2000)

Great fun - surrealism you can only find on short-lived shows.

[11 March 2004]

I'm surprised to see only one negative review on IMDB. Having been a fan of the show since its debut, I knew from the start it would be a love or hate series for many people.

It's a great show not for its intellectual qualities (or on the surface, lack thereof), but its originality. Teen dramacom parodies have come before, though none as brave as this. SwC reminds me in part of the Nickelodeon series from the early-mid 90s such as "Salute your Shorts", which is perhaps why I and many others who grew up in that era have a soft spot for it.

It's sad to think we might not see many more divisive T.V series. The dumbing down of the masses by shows in which greedy people vote one another off fake islands ensures subtly and wit will soon be regarded as the real enemies of television.

MythBusters (2003–2018)

Fantastic series

[17 October 2003]

I rank this up there with "Junkyard Wars" in the Discovery channel's edutainment lineup. Every day myths to obscure urban legends are tested and either proved or busted in entertaining and sometimes educational experiments.

Recommended for Urban Legend buffs or anyone with any amount of interest in Science.

Late Night with Conan O'Brien (1993–2009)

Getting really stale.

[25 September 2003]

After ten years on the air, any show can and will show signs of age. "Late Night", however, has been exhibiting such signs since 1998. While one would not expect much variety from a late night talk show, a medium renowned for "traditions" (Carson's lists, Jay's "Headlines", Letterman's Top 10, etc.), "Late Night" seems to think it can succeed on doing the exact same things every night. Example: Conan comes out, dances, tells bad joke, acts surprised the audience doesn't laugh, pauses for what seems like five minutes, then dances some more. That may be humorous to some, but most people want a little more substance in their comedy. What was once tolerable is now cringe-inducing, and Conan doesn't seem to notice (or care about) his redundancy.

Another inexcusable tactic of the "writing" staff is their reliance on people dancing in whacky costumes. "Oh look", says one unfortunate viewer "that person is flopping about on the floor in a whale costume. I'm not laughing, but this is a comedy show so it must be funny." Sorry little Jimmy, but you're right. It's not funny anymore.

Darkness Falls (2003)

Attack of a Kabuki actor...

[1/10 · 16 April 2003]

Like the bland characters in this wreck of a film saw the ghost, I saw this movie, and also like them it gave me night terrors. Not because it's scary, but because it is so disturbingly bad.

Maybe I'm spoiled by good horror films like "The Thing" and "Cube", maybe I'm not in this movie's target demographic of 12-13 1/2 year olds, but you know something is wrong when the biggest fright of a horror film is a stagehand throwing a cat on the hood of 2DimensionalLeadGirl's car.

Speaking of characters, I don't believe any "actor" in this film was in one. I could feel their boredom and embarrassment as they delivered flat lines of clunky dialogue.

All in all, it is the worst movie I have ever seen. And I've seen "Thirteen Ghosts".

Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987–1994)

TOS' movies better than TNG's, TNG series better than TOS'.

[9 April 2003]

Let's face it: Next Generation's movies all suck. The writing is boring, the direction abysmal and all the actors look as if they're ready to run off stage in search of a shower to wash off the filth.

The series fares much better, however. While each week was just a lesson in morality, usually confined to a few rooms on the ship and some sets vaguely resembling a cave, planet or starbase, it was enjoyable on many levels, and to me took on from the start a notably different tone than the original series. It's just too bad they did away with Troi's ultra mini-skirt.

About Wesley. He was a mistake, and really brought down the show. Despite his "I can rebuild the warp engines using this rubberband and stapler" character, he was tolerable in a few episodes. The one where all the children on the Enterprise are kidnapped comes to mind--I find it Wesley's most "human" and likeable appearance...of course he saves the day like in all his episodes, the way in which he interacts with the children and kidnappers earned his character a lot of respect.

Kung Pow: Enter the Fist (2002)

Fortunately not what I expected

[3 April 2003]

I have to agree with the many previous reviews stating only fans of MST3K and similar styles of humor can truly appreciate this film.

Deceived by the horrible, unfunny trailer I avoided this in the theaters. Now that I've seen it on HBO, I am once again reminded that low level editors who haven't even seen the films shouldn't produce the trailers by putting together random scenes from the movie with their eyes closed.

There's not much to say about the movie itself as it's pretty black and white - like it or not. That is, like good humor, or processed pre-packaged, shallow, glossy Hollywood junk like "American Pie".

Crank Yankers (2002–2022)

The Hype was better than the show

[14 March 2003]

While I never had high hopes for this show (prank calls are rarely funny), I did watch the first few episodes based solely on the advertisements that ran weeks before it premiered.

The first episode was mildly entertaining, and the second bearable; but by the third it was obvious the show had jumped the shark. It's tedious watching washed up comedians perform the same joke over and over (Ex: the guy who burps loudly while applying for a job over the phone, the ever-annoying handicapped "Special Ed" who screams for five minutes STRAIGHT), which wasn't funny the first time.

Comedy Central has no right to cancel GOOD shows like UCB and keep garbage like this on the air.

Damned If You Do (2000)

One of the best shorts I've seen

[10/10 · 6 January 2003]

Absolutely amazing.

A professional quality film--in all areas, including acting and character and plot development, which is quite a feat in just 17 minutes--without the indignities of a Hollywood production.

A good dark comedy that somehow passes for something more innocent than it actually is.

Red Ribbon Blues (1996)

Yup.

[10/10 · 4 January 2003]

An oddly charming film from what I can remember. Not as intelligent or thought-provoking as I'm sure it wanted to be, it's still a fun caper with a narrative unique to the genre, and a message, albeit somewhat trite, that prevents it from becoming another "little guy vs. big corporation" movie.

The Hot Chick (2002)

Ohh! It was a comedy.

[31 December 2002]

Let me say right off that I do not, nor have I ever, thought of Rob Schneider as a comedian: he wasn't funny saying "[name] makin' copies" over and over and over and over on SNL, nor as the sensitive naked man. The "You like-a the sauce, yes? The sauce is very good, uh?" character? I'd rather watch "That 80s show" for an eternity than be subjected to that wreck of a sketch.

He definitely wasn't funny in Deuce Bigalo, and he certainly was anything but something that might be misconstrued as humorous in "The Animal".

I don't know; maybe it's his agent, but I think Rob can do better than this infantile garbage. Usually I can enjoy a stupid-funny movie, like "Scary Movie", but this doesn't even have [good]camp appeal--it is just stupid, unfunny, baby-green fecal matter.

Save your money and watch a movie with some self-respect, like that scat film where the Asian girl eats the dog crap.

Quantum Leap (1989–1993)

A part of my childhood

[4 December 2002]

Looking back at the television I watched and loved growing up, three shows come to mind: Mystery Science Theater 3000, Beavis & Butthead and Quantum Leap.

While not all episodes of QL were as intelligent as I would have hoped (some were just downright hokey and super-saccharine), a lot of the classics make great memories (Sam as the T.V space captain trying to prove he's not insane [awesome ending]; Jimmy; the "evil vs. good leaper" series and, of course, the last episode--it's some more of that sort of surrealism that T.V could use.

Now for the preachy section of this review: Network television is dying a slow and painful-to-look-at death. When I see shows like "The Bachelor" and the latest episodes of "The Simpsons", I feel like I've lost a best friend. The essence of QL or MST or even the early Simpsons must be injected into new series if "good" television is to have a future. Otherwise, buckle up for "Survivor 27: The Cornfields of Nebraska".

Space Truckers (1996)

A "fun" movie that doesn't take itself seriously

[10/10 · 3 December 2002]

I love a good movie (or bad in this case) that knows it sucks, and revels in that fact by going to the extremes of B-cheesieness.

Of course if you go in expecting a space opera and end up with a rodeo, you're going to be upset. Don't set any expectations and just have fun with this film.

Unbreakable (2000)

Shallow tripe

[22 November 2002]

What happens when you put a bunch of random things on screen, hoping people will look at it as art, desperately trying to understand the underlying references and metaphors the obviously genius director/ writer so carefully placed? That's right.

Avoid this amateur garbage.