QinetiQ Reviews

Hawkeye (2021)

Average, comedic action at times

[3/10 · 28 November 2021]

I didnt expect much from the most boring Avenger, what can you do with Hawkeye? He's an excellent archer, and thats it.

That aside, this show focusses more on his successor, which ofcourse has to be a girl who can take out men 3 times her size with a single kick.

The action is comedic, with stereotype russians (because thats still ok to do in a time where racial stereotypes are a deathsentence) who are acting over the top, action scenes that make little sense, Hawkeye even does some LARPing - eventhough he would be able to just step up because he's bloody Hawkeye, which makes no sense because he reeeaally wants to be home for christmas.. yet decides to play along with some LARPers.

Still, I think the shows will get some decent numbers because there are not many new shows to counter it at the moment.

Friends: The Reunion (2021 TV Special)

Fun throwback, annoying camerawork

[7/10 · 27 May 2021]

Overall this was a great reunion, I like that they mixed up the couch questions with the set visits etc. One thing really made this less pleasant to watch for me and that was the shakey camera when they were visiting the set. I got nauxious from the start. I guess the handheld shakey camerawork had to add to the spontaneous feeling but it made those parts of the reunion just annnoying to me.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Trainwreck 80s style

[2/10 · 27 December 2020]

Well that was surprisingly bad. I already had my doubts seeing the trailer but I guess the New Order - Blue Monday song got me somewhat pumped for it.

It starts with a throwback to a young Diana, it's cheesy and very predictable, but I accepted it as a set up to something more. Well queue a very bad mall robbery which oozes 80s, more than the 80s ever did. Its bad, its over the top, and makes no sense. It made me think of Home alone- Mall edition. Our hero-ess swoops in and delivers some horrible action, gravity devying because shes that good. The acting isnt actually that bad, its everything else. It's like watching a disneyvillain who turns into a bad genie, and theres a over the top nerdy woman who suddenly becomes a bombshell, once again over the top. Diana's love of her life comes back because she wished for it, but hes actually some other dude. Huh? Yes, its weird.

I like Wonder Woman 2017, it had some flaws but was mature enough. This new one is far from that level.

The Umbrella Academy (2019–2024)

Good watch, very different from the usual superhero teams series

[9/10 · 9 August 2020]

So I went in not expecting too much of this. I did watch most other series about superhero teams like Titans, Doom Patrol etc. NOne of these series were able to keep me interested. So I wasnt expecting too much, and got pleasantly surprised.

TUA differs that it doesnt focus on the good team vs evil too much, it focusses on their own personal struggle as well, and its very well combined, or better said, interwoven. As others have stated, its not just the storytelling thats good, the music is great and the pace is good as well; it never really stalls, it gets slower sometimes to get some story in. The cast is great, and diverse, all perform well. I never really cared much for Ellen Page her boring way of acting, but it actually fits in this case. Tom is doing good, being the brute, although he isnt really cut out for comedy much I think. The comedic scenes he's always pulling that odd "duh" face as if he doesnt know how to look. Above all is Aidan Gallagher's performance though, his delivery, his intense look, he pulls it off every episode, he's definitely the star of this show.

The season 2 finale clearly makes the team leave their internal battles more and face a more common enemy, and it actually makes me look forward to season 3 more than season 1 did for me to season 2.

If you like Titans and all that but found them a bit shallow, you will definitely love TUA.

Glass (2019)

Weak story, strong Beast

[3/10 · 2 April 2019]

Well, I am reading all these reviews how this is a perfect movie, 10/10, best trilogy etc. I fail to see why. I went in completely neutral, as I liked Unbreakable, accepted Split and figured this could be interesting. The acting, everyone is doing fine, poor dialog isnt an actor's fault. McAvoy is delivering, as he did in Split. The story itself is acceptable, some nifty twists, as you might expect from M. Night Shyamalan, but the writing is just poor.

We have a serial kidnapper being caught (Bruce bumps into him pretty soon, the odds!) and he gets send to a mental hospital right away. Not one in a prison, no sir, just a regular(?) one, with minimum security. Even 'normal' mental hospitals would have more personell around, let alone one for criminals. Not only is the security minimum, the guards are downright idiots. No protocols are followed ("is he really a serial kidnapper?gee let me get close unarmed") and there's no sign of any police or justice department involved. All the relatives seem perfectly fine with this kind of treatment too, no policereports or so, no lawyers or anything...all good. Half way through I was already done with the writing, superpowers are more convincing than this storyline.

My hat off to McAvoy for saving this movie, he carried it.

The 5th Wave (2016)

Pretty bad and boring

[2/10 · 19 March 2016]

I don't understand how this is getting any good ratings, I guess people who benefit from it are the ones giving those ratings.

There is nothing interesting about this movie, the story is very flat and everything is predictable. It is filled with illogical decisions and the alien race, who is intelligent enough to come here and rule on landing, has no clue what to do and how to do anything efficiently.

The so called waves are a fun given fact but make little sense. If if an alien race would go with that, I am sure they could come up with a more efficient 'wave' than to just infiltrate the human race. Their drones seem to be having no use at all, other than flying from point A to B.

If an alien race has such technology and are in such dire need for living space, I don't think they will go with such a slow and pretty stupid method. They were already observing the earth for decades (if not longer) so I am sure wave 3 could have been a lot more efficient.

Even setting all that aside, the movie is just one cliché event after another. It's one of those movies you go watch if you have really, really nothing else to do.

Bob's Burgers (2011– )

Worth it

[9/10 · 11 July 2014]

When I first saw the commercials about a new cartoon-series I wasn't really impressed. Bobs burgers, about a burgershop, really..? The style was a strong reminder of Beavis and Butthead and the short commercial didn't really impress me much. Maybe I was a bit skeptical because the last years no cartoon or animation series has impressed me much. Brickleberry for example never made me laugh and I didn't like any of the characters.

When it comes to that, TV is riddled with the McFarlane cartoons and even though I still like family guy (not love), its all becoming a tad repetitive.

So I gave Bob's Burgers a chance. I had to get used to the style and wasn't convinced a Burgershop could deliver anything fun, but after a few ep's I am pleasantly surprised. The pace is really good, dialogs are fast and you have to take notice of all or you will miss a joke or clever pun. The cartoon-style works, it gives a bit of 80's nostalgia and it just looks funny - seeing Louise go nuts wearing those ears is just a funny sight.

The characters all work for me, I noticed a lot dislike Gene but I can see him fit in. He delivers a lot of clever (superfast) jokes (scrotumwax!) so for me he adds.

Even the 'recurring characters' deliver, my fav would be Teddy ("we need a bigger restaurant!").

All in all its well-made and reasonably original (wich is rare these days) and it's actually funny. It may need to grow on you, I needed a few episodes but now I am a fan.

Hostel: Part III (2011 Video)

More actionbased, less gory

[5/10 · 14 December 2011]

If you never saw the previous Hostel movies you would probably say, it's entertaining with a decent pace. The overall acting is good, camera-work is nice and the sets are equal to that.

However, compared to the original Hostel this is more an action-getaway movie than the torturehorror it was supposed to be. There's no eery atmosphere like the first one had, the setting is too clean and bright and the 'torture' is mostly ruined by the CGI.

As for the killscenes, they didn't make me cringe at all. There are still tools used, weapons and even bugs but none gets close to that dark torture from the original (slicing achilles tendon anyone?). In my opinion they took a wrong turn in making the 'torture performances' into a social gathering instead of the devious maniacs who tortured for their own pleasure.

I give it a 5 for the otherwise well-made movie (the intro is pretty surprising) but it didn't bring what I hoped for plus the ending is a bit over the top.

Sniper: Reloaded (2011 Video)

Not bad but had more potential

[5/10 · 13 April 2011]

We see the son (Chad Michael Collins) of the original Sniper (Tom Berenger) in a story that goes up and down a bit. The part where the whole team gets wiped out shows some good directing and camera-work in my eyes, but the whole story goes a bit downhill after that, and with it, the directing and that same camera-work.

There's a whole lot of running back to bases and then back into the jungle, on the way there's a very stubborn rebel that can take about 6 snipershots and the skirmishes and battles get more and more amateuristic near the end. In the final I found the "feared evil" sniper being rather clumsy and he didn't come across as a well-trained soldier.

Maybe I am just a bit disappointed that this is not really about the sniper, it is about finding the sniper. I never got that thrill from this movie of what a sniper feels and sees - thats basically what I wanted to see.

Last of the Living (2009)

Disappointing

[1/10 · 18 May 2009]

No. Not that good. I must admit I was fooled by the other (2) comments here on this movie, so I might have expected too much of it.

The start is an exact copy of 28 Days Later and soon it becomes a slapstick of how to bash a mindless/slow (badlooking) zombie in a cool way. The moment I saw the first zombie appear I knew this wouldn't do it for me. It's like a few blokes made a homemade zombie flick with some You-can-play-the-zombie friends. It never held my attention, it never got scary. And thats basically it. Some new characters are added to add..nothing, more zombies appear (I guess if you can't act you can always play a zombie) and the bashing continues. If you like boring kick-the-zombie movies, this is for you, if not just skip it.

Laid to Rest (2009)

Entertaining

[7/10 · 4 April 2009]

A girl wakes up in a coffin with memory loss and manages to get out and escape. Some weirdo with a skeletonmask is chasing her while she has no idea why or who he is, or even what her own name is. On the run she meets some people who try to help her.

I think this movie is well-made, there's blood and gore for the fans of the genre and the follow-ups aren't that bad either. Bobbi Sue Luther's performance was good, although it mostly meant she had to be confused and scared. Still, she didn't annoy me at all, I've seen plenty of movies where the chased girl annoyed the heck out of me.

Lena Heady's role (who you might recognize as Queen Gorgo from 300) is very small, which surprised me.

It's not just chasing, blood and gore (well, the biggest part is but) there are also some moments where they managed to squeeze in some emotional moments that worked well.

Overall, I was entertained, the effects were OK, the camera-work good and, well, I have a weak for Bobbi Sue Luther ;) (I'm Dutch, so pardon my English)

1968 Tunnel Rats (2008)

Only good underground

[5/10 · 3 February 2009]

Tunnel Rats is about clearing out the VC tunnels and it is clear this movie dedicates to that. The fights in the tunnels are good and refreshing, movie-wise. There are a lot of Vietnam movies around, this one separates itself from those because of the main theme.

Now, the fights and..well,everything besídes the tunnels is just poorly done. Nothing is right, from uniforms to weapons, to action scenes, all is badly done. Apparently these tunnel rats work independantly (?) and just have a hippie-gathering somewhere in the jungle. They have it all set up, showers etc, all is there. What they forgot to make is a perimeter of some kind. To everyone's surprise they get attacked (wich can only BE a surprise since they had no line of sight at all around the camp).

So the VC's storms the camp, and while they are in a (badly acted) fight,explosions everywhere, there are still soldiers walking out their tent like it is a sundaymorning.I cant believe any director would let scenes like that be in their movie.

With the well-done tunnel scenes and all the innovations shown within them, I was sadly disappointed by the rest of this movie. Which is a shame, since it had a fresh look on things. A 7 for the tunnelscenes, a 3 for the jungle-scenes, is a 5.

They (2002)

Good one

[10/10 · 6 January 2009]

With all the low(er)-budget horrors/suspense movies popping up, this one really surprised me the most. I read the backside and thought "Oh well, could be entertaining" ..and it sure was. I prefer to watch these kinds of movies alone and in the dark, so nothing distracts me, and that sure worked. The sounds are well done, fitting, and the creatures appearances are perfect. You don't see them much which adds to the shockeffect of every attack. "Wtf is it" -moments.

I read many comments on this title and disagree with most, I don't think it is average at all. It doesn't drag, the camera-work is good and the acting is not bad either. Sure it doesn't deserve an Oscar but hey, I don't like most Oscar-winning movies anyway. Grin.

Alien Raiders (2008)

Not bad at all

[7/10 · 23 December 2008]

Like everyone else I agree that the title is the worst part of this movie.

For a low budget movie it turned out pretty good. Good acting, right pace, all that. There's nothing that really bugged me, apart from some usual 'why-do-that' moments.

I didn't have any info what it was about (apart from it being about aliens/infections) so I was going in blind. The start is nifty, with what seems like a robbery but turns into a bloodbath right away. It is not fully packed with action, but it doesn't really get dull at any points. One of the few things that annoyed me was the shaky cam when the alien roars, it wasn't needed IMO.

One could start about lack of CGI but come on, it's a low budget movie and they did a good job making it entertaining. I enjoyed it.

Minotaur (2006)

Not all that bad

[5/10 · 23 August 2008]

I watched it on TV tonight, and I must say I watched it till the end, which is pretty rare for me when it comes to watching special-effects movies on TV (since I watch most 'good' SE movies in the theater).

I didn't even mean to watch it, but I zapped passed it just when it started and bascily thats what kept me interested; the atmosphere, lighting etc was interesting. It starts of rather slow in my opinion, but it picks up speed half way through.

I think the title is a bit misleading since it doesn't involve the real minotaur, but a creature that people in the movie believe it is the minotaur. It's entertaining, surely not a top movie but still they managed to make it interesting using the various characters. The effects are OK for a movie with this budget, I never thought it was too fake. Some stuff did bother me, as example, the gas; He can smell the gas when he sticks his head in the hole. In the end he managed to light it, and it suddenly blows through the whole labyrinth, up to the pitholes in the palace. I am no chemist, but it doesn't make much sense why it would do that. The fire would just follow the gasstream, not create a massive stream on its own. If the gas was already streaming so badly, no one would be able to live in the palace.

Another thing that make me think, since the minotaur was actually just some strange monstrous bull, how could they been feeding it for centuries, or at least more than a human lifetime? Age affects every living being, even hideous bulls.

Other than that, it was entertaining, the casting was well done, the girls pretty, dialogs were OK, and effects pretty good for a lower budget movie.

Stuck (I) (2007)

Not what I expected

[4/10 · 31 July 2008]

Well, let me be the first to be disappointed.

Before watching this movie I knew very little about the storyline and didn't read any comments, so it was all open to me. All I knew was it was a horror and partly based on true events.

It starts of OK, getting to know the main char's, personalities, problems and so on. Then the poop hits the fan, I put my helmet on and arm myself with chips and some coke. The crash is pretty brutal and... well, that was 1 out of 3 brutal scenes in the whole movie. After that there's little to no action, just a pretty retarded blonde who doesn't seem to care that there's a man stuck in her car in the garage.

For some reason I just expected way more action from this, I cant really place it in the horror-box. But then again, a guy gets hit, flies through a windshield and is stuck there, how much action can one expect from that.

I give it a 4 because of the not-so-bad directing and the 15 seconds semi-naked skirmish between the girls, grin.

Alone in the Dark (2005)

Yawning in the dark

[1/10 · 18 June 2008]

Yes it is awful. This is the first movie I actually log in for to give a one on the scale. Could it be worse? No.

Slater is trying and trying, but cant save the movie. I wonder what he thought of the final result, I don't think he would have had a good feeling about it. And I honestly cant imagine Reid getting another offer for a movie after this one, she was a joke.

I watched the movie 2 hours ago, and already cant remember the deeper lines of the movie, maybe because there were no deeper lines..? It just didn't make any sense. Movies that don't make sense should have something to make up for that gap, this movies doesn't have anything. Skip it. I mean, really.

30 Days of Night (2007)

Good vampireflick

[7/10 · 7 February 2008]

Well, I read some of the comments before watching the movie (doh) and had a good feeling about it, so I was looking forward.

And I must say I find this one of the best vampire movies I have seen , though I have to mention I normally hate them so it doesn't make this an oscarwinner.

It starts of decent, from the first minute on one can tell this movie is filmed and directed by someone who has a good eye for it. Nice cameramovements, the right lighting etc. Then the mayem begins, the typical first victims who are clueless to what is going on and then the part where everyone is getting aware that 'theres something fishy' going on.

I can cope with all that went down until they started hiding in the attic, after that, the storyline got pretty messy. They keep running back and forth and the joy I had watching it so far kinda went down the drain when I saw the huge leaps in time. If you had to hide days and days in fear for vampires it would get to you, but the characters look the same as on day 1.

A lot of stuff obviously doesn't make sense, like if they can smell blood (as said in the movie) why didn't the vampires find them. One was in the same house and díd smell them, but then never came back. Also the fat guy surviving that blast was not very realistic and since he dies 20 seconds later I would have let him evaporate in the blast.

And finally the last part, where he injects vampireblood in his arm, sigh. If he really got their strength minutes after receiving the blood then why didn't that guy under the house (forgot the name)who was also infected (..and stayed under the house for days in that weather?) also get so strong? And so useless.. 15 minutes after injecting himself, the sun is rising! Stella and the girl have to get away from the car otherwise they would burn. Uhm, It took a few minutes for that sunrise to kick in, they had way more chance when staying under the car and wait it out. Then he didn't have to inject himself.. ah well, you get my point.

In short, not bad, good effects (overhead shot is cool) good start, lame middle and ending. Camera-work/atmosphere is well done.

Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

Ups and downs

[7/10 · 2 February 2008]

Well, reading some of the comments here, people seem very diverse in their judgment.

I guess none of the people who watched this move was expecting a academy award winner, so burning this movie down doesn't sound right to me.

Surely it has many flaws, I saw one commenter sum up a whole list of flaws, but why? What Sci-fi movie doesn't have any flaws in the script? I agree that some things could have been better, like , why was the brother an ex- convict, it didn't add much to anything. But questioning why a Predator would use his shouldergun in his spaceship is just plain stupid.. It was it's only chance (one might say, he could have activated his bomb, but in my experience it still takes a few seconds to do that, and he only had one second). Well, things like that will always be around in any Sci-fi movie.

It was too dark. Of course, nighttime adds some shock-effects, and rain just makes the situation look even worse, but boy, a bit more light would have been fun. I guess it was to cover up the low budget they spent on the CGI.

I think AVP is a bit stuck. IMO, the problem is, none of them has any dialog. They HAVE to add humans, otherwise there is no speech or whatsoever. But humans don't add á-ny-thing to the AVP action.

If there ever will be a sequel, I hope they will make a full-time war on some shitty planet between masses of Aliens and Predators. Give them all ranks, the higher-the bigger/cooler and somehow,somehow find away to add some dialog. Yeah. That'd be cool. ;-)

Well, I enjoyed it, not an awesome movie, but entertaining.