pixiekatten Reviews

Willow (2022–2023)

The fairytale returns - without magic, humour and heart.

[1/10 · 25 December 2022]

I grew up with the many wonders Willow originally offered. A great story executed by actors with a sublime chemistry that made me watch the movie again and again. The film has both tongue in cheek and a big heart - and the magic was not only in the tale but it turned this masterpiece into a fantasy legend that many of us treasure even in adulthood.

This series lacks it all. The so called 'unlikely heroes' or 'band of misfits' are actually just a group of stuck up castle kids. These miserable adolescents provide only endless bickering, tiresome teen flirting or occasionally flat jokes that never land. They are insufferable and almost impossible to watch. I felt an instant dislike to the whole bunch and had to fight the urge to turn it off. Surely this could only get better.....!

But this is no fairytale. The script is so bad that within the first 10 minutes I could not take anything seriously, and it stays that way. And to make it all worse, Willow manages to crown it all with acting so wooden it becomes an added embarrassment. His stilted dialogue is unbearable - the magic is truly dead.

I persisted for 3 episodes in the hope that something somehow would reignite the flame and save what was once a dreamworld worthy of decades of awe. But there is nothing saving this heartless attempt of a sequel. This time the adventure ended with my off button, never to be pursued again.

28 Days Haunted (2022– )

Murder She Wrote meets Hillbilly Ghost Busters. (Unfortunately that makes it sound fun, it's not).

[1/10 · 25 December 2022]

It's almost blasphemy connecting this atrocity to Ed and Lorraine Warren. They must be tossing and turning in their graves over the fact that this is what became of their legacy. They suggested it takes 28 days to break through the barrier that separates the spirit world with ours. Now that sounds really fascinating and could've been a great series. But instead we got.... this.

What was Netflix thinking!? Is this a spoof? Surely they didn't put this out thinking we'd buy into this silly mess of scripted and (bad) CGI filled ghost hunting? It's a 'who done it' type of thing: Murder She Wrote meets Hillbilly Ghost Busters, was there ever such thing. And if fails to engage. It fails to scare. It fails to be in any way believable. Viewers are taken for absolute fools by these rather juvenile and ill-mannered teams of so called 'demonologists', 'sensitives' and 'clairvoyants' - who looks like they've all been scooped up at an 'all you can eat BBQ buffet at the local truck stop.

They're so called experts yet they jump every time something goes bump in the dark. Their goofy machinery seems to be based on the science that the more twinkling lights the better. The gadgets pick up random noise and yet somehow the teams conclude complete tales of murder and hidden horrors. Then there's the apparatus that actually blurts out complete sentences conjured by the demon world - but we all know it's really camera man Steve and his cup on a string....

No need for science or proof in this show either. Naw! We are simply expected to take their words for it every single time they "feel something" or claim to speak to the spirits, or something touches them. They lay out whole explanations and conclusions- solving 50 year old murders - all on a hunch ... oh no sorry, through the guidance of the spirits (that only they heard). And not only that, apparently demonic possession is somewhat of a choice, yep, one guy simply snaps out of it after his team mate has a worried one to one with him over morning coffee. Good to know! And hey, what about the guy who quite obviously watched Stranger Things one too many times and figured that Eleven's sensory deprivation tank could also work for him - and then it did! Yay! How about that. Now we can all unlock our abilities to talk to the other side, it really is that simple! Lastly don't get me started on the copper pentagram they dug out of the ground - why would you ever think to get hold of an expert to decider the age of the object when you can simply pick a year out of your kaboose! And then base all future outcomes and conclusions on this very scientific method. Amen!

Yeah as you might have figured by now, this is really bad. However, my biggest question is relating to the two gents "witnessing" the whole charade and apparently calling the shots: Tony Spera from good ol' New England Society For Psychic Research, as well as paranormal expert Aaron Sagers. Did they get a sort of 'best of' ghost hunting mix tape that they watched in a day and their 20 TV screens were just for show as their commentary was actually filmed all in one afternoon - OR - did they really do 28 days of witnessing and commenting, wearing the same clothes day in and day out - OR - is that red sweater and the leather jacket ensemble simply their fav looks for a ghastly, I mean ghostly "documentary" like this ..... now that's the biggest mystery of them all. Well done Netflix! One star.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Turned off the film to write this review

[1/10 · 10 January 2021]

Bad does not come close when trying to describe this film. A nonsense plot with mediocre acting! Utter rubbish. Annoying dialog throughout. No cool action scenes. I am ashamed on behalf of the actors who are part this monstrosity. Not one of them manages to save a single scene. I can't think of one good thing to say about this flop. And it goes on forever. With 30minutes left I turned it off as I just could not wait any longer to rate this 1/10! I do not care about how it ends. This is the worst superhero film of all times. Do not bother! It is a waste of both time and money!

The Curse of La Llorona (2019)

An OK addition to the Conjuring-verse

[7/10 · 6 January 2021]

I rated this a 7 because there is no 6.5... So yeah it is full of jump scares. And yes you do get to see The Weeping Woman - a lot - perhaps too much as someone else said. However, I really prefer this to the Nun which I found bland and not meeting any expectations whatsoever. The Curse of La Llorona is not a masterpiece in the horror genre but neither is it such garbage as people here claim. Feels a little bit like many jumped on the bandwagon and trashed it which is just as generic and boring as they claim this film is.

I quite enjoyed this film. It passed the time and I jumped a few times. And I found a few scenes quite disturbing. Did it drag slightly? Yes a tad. But it is still an OK addition to the Conjuring universe with a fun cameo by Annabelle. Don't expect too much and just go along with it. The director might be trying a little bit too hard to scare us. But it's his first to give the lad a break.

The Haunting of Bly Manor (2020)

A ghostly drama with no scares

[3/10 · 14 October 2020]

Like many others I am a huge fan of Hill House and was beyond excited when Bly Manor was coming out. Despite the so-so reviews I sat down to watch it with an open mind. Hill House grasps you from the very start and holds you in its grip until the last episode. Despite not expecting quite the same brilliance from Bly Manor there surely had to be a few things going bump in the night in this series too...

Bly Manor is a slow burn but I still got through the first 3-4 episodes fairly easy. There wasn't really any scares but definitely an eerie feeling throughout and I was intrigued by what was hinted. This could become real good still!

Sadly each episode that followed went from slow to slower and the storyline really started to drag by episode 6. There were a few unveilings that I think were supposed to make us go "what!? no way!!" but they all fell flat. It became messy with the whole 'tucked away' thing and one episode I didnt get at all - I had to google it because it jumped back and forth in a confusing manner. I usually follow trippy timelines with ease and excitement so this felt like the writers were just trying a bit too hard to deliver something a bit mad and failing massively to do so. It did not intrigue me at all.

I also managed to guess one of the big twists which was quite disappointing. It just felt rather obvious. On top of that the sudden backstory to the meanest ghost was sort of just plonked in without being built up to at all. And as the story moves places at the very end (you'll know what I mean) I lost all interest because frankly I was too bored to care.

Overall I found Bly Manor poorly thought through with a script that could been cut in half. No interesting character arcs nor does it ever really hook you in. The acting is pretty good. Fun to see a few familiar faces from Hill House. Which by the way I am currently re-watching because wow - that series is a ghost story as it should be! I am sad to say that Bly Manor will be a huge disappointment to anyone who expects something similar. There are no bumps in the dark!

Night of the Wolf (2014)

Great addition to the wolf pack

[8/10 · 19 May 2020]

I really enjoyed Late Phases. There aren't many decent werewolf flicks coming out and this one is definitely one to watch. Side by side with the werewolf hunt there is another interesting story line nudging at small town communes and gossipy church ladies. There's a soft side hidden within the old veteran grump - I loved the lead character from the very first scene and he carries through to the end. A man and his dog, always a clever way to introduce your protagonist and make us like him.

I very much enjoyed that in a very Silver Bullet-esque way the film keeps you guessing who in the town is the one howling at the moon. There's a creepy tone carried through which make the film work, because even though it never really gets that scary, I was still kept on my toes. For those who like gore there's a bit of that as well.

The end could have been dragged out slightly. We waited a month (main part of the film) for the next full moon and when it finally arrived from behind the clouds it was all over pretty quick. That was the only letdown.

The creatures are costumes and not cgi - thank you for that! All my fav werewolf films have again and again proved that well made suits are far scarier than computer made wolfs. These ones aren;t great but they do the job. I've seen far better transformation scenes which again is a tad of a letdown as this is a high point for every werefan!

A well written script with a fantastic lead kept me entertained on many levels. A great addition to the wolf pack!

Cats (2019)

Never seen Cats? Go to the theatre!!!!!

[1/10 · 19 May 2020]

I cannot repeat that enough. Cats the theatre production is amazing! Please do not ruin a magical show forever by watching this strange mess.

I am not a musical fan to be honest BUT I do absolutely love the theatre version. It is super cool, both the set and the performers fill you with awe throughout! Songs are CATchy! A truly wonderful experience that I decided to happily relive when my local Playhouse put it up again a few years after seeing it the first time. It is that good!

Then this film came out and I was quite excited. But this is not anything like the theatre. It is not even a little bit good. It is not even bad. It is beyond disturbing. What even are they? They are strangely human and not feline enough to feel like cats - but nor human enough to feel like people in costumes. Cats with weird peoples' faces and bodies but covered in fur and added pointy ears. If it sounds sort of fun - it is not! Yuck! Odd. Creepy. Not haha creepy. Just really wrong!

I tried to watch the whole thing. I really did. Between feeling a tad sickened and really confused, I managed to somehow push through. Until they murdered 'Memory'! That's when the hurt and disgust got to much to handle. I had enough and turned off this godforsaken mess. Please listen to the reviews. Don't put yourself through this catastrophe!

Flu (2013)

Entertaining but unconvincing and dragging end.

[5/10 · 14 March 2020]

So like many others I stumbled across this film while bitten by the outbreak movie bug. And after reading the reviews, of which many promised a great Contagion-esque disaster movie, I was real excited to watch it. I am a fan of Korean film so that added to my hopes that this was gonna be good.

Entertaining, yeah ok, at least the first half.. But meh! It is definitely not anything spectacular that you'll remember once it finishes (and I did wish for it to finish in the end - wow those 2 hours felt rather long). My biggest issue was hot female doctor who is a specialist in her field only to break every rule in the book when it comes to her daughter. Even if it is a plausible scenario it is just not convincing in this flick. The fireman and male lead is a charmer and there's a bit of banter going on, but wow, obsess much! He really puts everything at risk, including his own life again and again and again, and also more or less adopt this kid he barely knows...and keeps chasing this lady who keeps making terrible decisions from start to finish, I mean that poor surviver and patient Zero should be on top of her list to keep alive and kicking (antibodies and all that)! Surely! Isn't that what they teach doctors in outbreak school!?

The non-korean characters are slightly laughable and people claim this is what would really happen if there was such a deadly outbreak, well, not sure I agree on that one. Attempts to start mass killing the innocent and very (!) healthy citizens while the world is watching is probably not high on any commanders list. Also the coughing scenes at the start are a bit in your face. We get that this is how it spreads. You don't have to dumb it down with zoomed in contagious droplets landing on ice creams and what not.

So yeah. There's a bit of action. And a bit of political tenseness. There's the quite strange mama-daughter relationship (why is she so easily leaving her very young daughter unattended all night to later on become an irrational mess over her wellbeing?). And there is sort of like a romance thing going on, at least one way hopes from the man who just won't give up. It tries to play on heart strings and it tries to make us appalled. I think the film makers hope us to sit on the edge of our seat... But it is a little bit hit and miss. It is not bad though! It is just not that great either.

If you have two hours to spend then go for it. But this is not Outbreak. It is not Contagion. And it is definitely not anywhere near The Host.

Cobra Kai (2018–2025)

Defeat does not exist in this dojo!

[8/10 · 17 February 2020]

I never ever thought I'd rate this series an 8/10. But hey, I have to confess that I am loving it. I started watching it when it first came out but for some reason I never got passed the first episode. I gave it a 2nd chance the other day - and happy I did. Because this is actually a worthy continuation of the 80s flicks.

There is a neat balance between playing on the sentimental strings of everyone who grew up with these guys a few decades ago, and to get a new audience to stick around too. There's the music, favourite scenes, famous lines... all reenacted in one way or another. Yeah it is cool to relive all those favourite moments and classic tunes. And they even managed to keep a decent script all throughout the first season, while introducing quite a few likeable new characters too. So what it get cheesy as heck every now and then... it's the Karate Kid... the whole thing was pretty cheesy to start off with.

I liked (and funnily enough rooted) for Johnny way back in the 80s. And it's just really awesome that this character get a comeback as a class A anti-hero. Larusso was pretty lame back then, and sorry I can't help it, he still is. But there is a nice chemistry going on and it is quite funny at times too - this is a great reboot. Nice touch with the flashbacks using original scenes from the old movies. Nostalgia does not get better than this! Cant wait to start season 2.

Christopher Robin (2018)

They could not have made a better film about this Silly old Bear!

[8/10 · 13 January 2020]

This is quite a remarkable film. It is humble, a tad sad, funny and full of heart - just like a film about Pooh should be. Expect to tear up. Expect smiling silly. Expect a fine walk down memory lane.

All Milne's characters are crafted beautifully onto the big screen and the script is very well written too. Great performances from the entire cast. I did not expect to be this moved by the silly old Bear and friends, but I was blown and and loved every minute. It has to be said, wow did some scenes make me weep! Something fundamental happens within when a character has the nerve to shout and mistreat this loving bear. But, there is also giggles in the plenty - a great wee adventure that masterfully plays on many strings.

This is a film for all ages, not only will it entertain the younger folks, but it is also an important reminder for us older viewers, to find and stay true to our inner Christopher Robin and not forget what really is important in life. Cannot recommend it enough!

The Dead Don't Die (2019)

Judged on Jarmusch-ness, not the Z-factor.

[5/10 · 4 January 2020]

When Jim Jarmusch makes a Z-flick one should immediately realise it will not be a traditional Zombie movie. And therefor not even try to compare it to to the existing catalogue of Zombie gore, comedy, drama etc. Jarmusch will do what Jarmusch does - something entirely different. His style. His vision. And this might not be in everyone's liking as his film are often dialogue driven - the story is in the details of what's being said. And I however do enjoy many of his previous films. That's why I review this as a comparison to these, and rate "The Dead Don't Die' according to what I expected from him as a film maker.

The usual quirkiness is there. The social commentary is attempted but gets a little bit in your face. And I do like the characters - or what they could've been rather. I bet they looked good on paper and that's why so many signed up to be part of the ride. Just that it is not a ride. It drags and limps until it finally reaches the zombie stand off. An all star cast can't save the scenes - the script is simply not the usual poetry and the lines are delivered without finesse nor humour. It feels like the movie lacks decent directing too.

I never expected it to be a scary movie. But it's not a funny movie either - and I did expect at least a few laughs. Since when has Bill Murray not provided comedy gold! All in all I am disappointed, and sometimes slightly confused, by the lacklustre performances. 1hr40min feels long, though there are a few highlights. Iggy Pop's coffee zombie was slightly entertaining. I won't tell you not to watch it, but save it for a rainy day when there's not much else. It will not have you greatly entertained - but it will pass the time.

Shameless (2011–2021)

Flawless goes mindless - 10 seasons of Shameless.

[8/10 · 2 January 2020]

I saw the UK series years ago and absolutely loved it. But for some reason I didnt get around to watch the US version until recently. What a mistake. This show is utter brilliance. I got sucked in immediately and commenced on a serious binge watching journey. It is indeed an entirely from its UK predecessor but that was to be expected. To compare the two is ludicrous. The social commentary of Shameless US has different roots - it finds its identity in the american way - but still manages to hit home for someone in the UK. Its genius. The dark sense of humour makes you cringe and laugh. Some episodes real upsets you. It's a storm, blazing through its 55min playtime, and you can't wait to hit play on the next episode.

The characters feel slightly wobbly in the first couple of episodes but everyone quickly find their feet. And they start marching through season after season of pure excellence. It is witty, it is mad, it is funny - it is hellbent on making you shrink into your seat because it is hard to watch the deviousness and the darkness. Shameless dont beat around the bush. It hits you in the face with its brutal honest regarding alcohol and drug abuse, about mental illness, sexual orientations as well as poverty and teenage angst. It's all there. But it is also equally shamelessly laugh-out-loud funny. You hate some characters, you love some of them - and some take some time to grown on you. Just as with people in real life. One season ends, you can't wait to hit play on the next!

It goes on like that. For 8 whole seasons. One amazing episode after another. A few are a little bit hit and miss... but you still like almost all of them. There are giggles yet. And oh so many outrageous incidents and plots. There are a few twists and turns. Some less likeable characters are introduced (sorry Sammi). Some loveable ones take a leave. But all in all the high standard is kept and it is an enjoyable ride. Until the car crash that is season 9 hits the screen.

Messy writing. Unconvincing performances. Silly plots. Too many unlikable characters. The series suddenly feels shouty and very in your face with the all the over the top social commentary. It is no longer cleverly done with tongue in cheek. Every episode is uneven, and characters come and go, some return and some don't. It is rushed and sloppy, with some strangely ignored plot holes. What once was a thrilling ride full of surprises and punches has become a tad boring and rather stupid. The cast feels tired. A main character has jumped ship and it is apparent that there is a serious case of overcompensating frenzy trying to sweep that loss under the carpet. The laughs are less frequent. It's hard to keep up interest. And it is a sad day and a real shame to confess to yourself that by season 10, episode 8, you no longer give a darn.

I will keep watching though. I am hoping that perhaps this is another wobble. I really do hope they find their feet again and once more embark on a crusade filled with bold attitude and gritty fun. No matter what Shameless US has been a hell of a ride and you should watch it no doubt about it. If it was;t for the recent downfall in standards, then this series would easily be 10 stars!

It Comes at Night (2017)

Out of frame suspense

[7/10 · 1 January 2020]

This is not a film with zombies or gore. It still beats most horrors from recent years. This is a movie about the monster of man, about what resides within us... ready to be unleashed when fear hits.

The suspense is hidden in what we can't see. Out of the frame. In the dark. In symbols and dreams. We are forced to make our own guesses on what is actually going on. And don't expect answers. There's a disease out there - it scares the hell out of people. We don't get to know much more than that. The soundtrack is out of this world. Despite daylight scenes where not much is actually happening the music feeds us a notion that things are about to go south. And it does.

If you like an easy follow plot dished up on a plate, with a conclusive ending or a clever twist, then this film has none of it. But it is good. It is scary. It is well worth a watch. Great performances from the whole cast. 92minutes flies by.

Heroin(e) (2017)

Heroin(e): Generations Lost and the Women who Fight.

[8/10 · 18 November 2019]

Firstly, and I'll say this first before I start my praise, I can agree with some other reviewers that this documentary does not show the darkest side of heroin addiction nor the most wicked and horrendous world of the addicts. However that said, this documentary is still very very good and 40minutes well spent.

The power and sadness of this documentary lies in the dialogue, as well as the heartbreaking monologues. "I fear that we have lost a couple of generations" (Jan Rader) followed by captions informing us that Huntington is the overdose capital of America with a death rate 10 times higher than the national average. Does the viewer really need the picture painted to them with shocking gory scenes? Abuse. Violence. Self-destruction. It's all there - inbetween the lines. In people's eyes. When the guy in the fire department says that 'all you see is the bad, it's constant, bad bad bad." He pauses, and there's such pain in his eyes as he continues "And then you drink". The subtle destruction of those working around the clock to save the lives of those using. I found that so incredibly tragic.

A beautiful juxtaposition takes place in this documentary. Against the eerie shots of 6th Avenue, where prostitutes waste away for drug money, and scenes from the drug court, where the failure to follow the program sends dead-eyed addicts to jail, there is the power and persistence of those who will not bend to the drug and the massive problems it causes. In focus are 3 women who in each way of their own, try to make a difference. I found all of them extremely admirable - and in all the misery that is the hard world of drugs, we need this kind of hope. We need to see the fighters that do not give up - who keep at it even in a battle that seems lost. Giving space to hope is not the same as whitewashing a problem.

I watched this with both smiles on my faces and eyes tearing up. I think there is a clever shift between despair and optimism. This documentary is not out to shock. It tells a tale of extensive drug use with calmness and that can be stronger than in your face footage. I hear the words 'elephant tranquilliser' from a former addict, and cannot even grasp what that would do to a human being. Lucky to be alive beyond doubt. A point also worth to raise. People do get clean, even if they often relapse as old heroin ghosts whisper lies in their ears and minds. This documentary shows us that too. It also gives way for recognition and wonder - the 3 women are indeed true heroines! The title delivers. This is good.

The Death of Superman Lives: What Happened? (2015)

Movie art, costumes, spiders - and Nic Cage with great hair.

[6/10 · 18 November 2019]

I did enjoy this documentary. It interviews some great visionaries, craftsmen and filmmakers and it was a treat to see how they think and their creative process. The issue I had with it though, is that after watching the documentary you end up wanting to know more, much much more. Instead of taking a proper dive into what really killed 'Superman Lives' it merely scratches the surface and goes on (a lot) about the art and design of creatures, monsters, costumes and that famous S on the chest. The documentary maker had all these amazing people at his finger tips - but yet the audience gets none the wiser to what actually happened, and what a Super gem of a movie this could actually have been! We're being slightly teased.

The Superhero movie that could've been sounds quite extraordinary and very 'out there' - actually it sounds absolutely bonkers! And with the team ready to start filming there must have been a proper storyline and interesting character arcs. A whole other level to build on for the documentary. But unfortunately the it sticks to talking mostly about design and the production of monsters and suits. Waste of potential. We get to know a little bit about which actor/actress were planned for some of the parts. And we get to see glimpses of an outstanding Nic Cage, owning the movie entirely through archive footage. I give the movie a 6/10 because it is slightly above mediocre. Listening to Tim Burton and Kevin Smith is always a pleasure. And all of the people being interviewed brings something worthwhile to the table. The old footage of Cage trying on suits is worth the movie alone. But in the end the film kinda drags on, and I really don't feel like seeing more creature designs or hear about spiders.

Along the way you get a feeling for this flick and starts imagining how cool it could've been, you suddenly have so many questions. But the documentary answers a mere few. Which in my eyes is such a fail. It is obvious that everyone involved had a vision and a great passion to make this movie. When the end finally comes it's a bit of a let down. The death of this weird Superman project deserved more than a 5 minute round up at the very end - just quickly letting us know why the plug was pulled, and sort of by who.

The 'what happened?' at the end of the documentary title suggests it will spill the beans once and for all. But it fails to deliver on this promise. If you are into art and design, and specially movie fan art - watch this and you shall be happy. If you're into documentaries about movies and also want to see entertaining behind the scenes with the one and only Nicholas Cage (with superb hair it has to be added) - then watch this and you'll have a good time. Just don't expect to learn much more than the simple fact that someone in Hollywood made us all miss out on a Burton-esque hell of a Super ride! I think we already knew that....

Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016)

Majestical movie with the Knack!

[9/10 · 19 October 2019]

This film captured me from the very start and kept me smiling to the very end. So much warmth. So many giggles. Likeable characters, and some unlikeable ones too, all portrayed to perfection. Sam Neil is great as the old Grumble, and the wee boy is an absolute star. And who better to play mad Sam the Bushman than Rhys Darby! That guy is comedy genius. The script is down to earth with a funny and heartwarming dialogue. The pair grow and develop - the story moves ahead without ever running wild. And it all happens to the backdrop of a breathtaking NZ scenery (and they even managed to fit in a nod to LOTR, well played). This is 10 chapters of goodness. Grand storytelling on a humble scale. Watch this film!!!

Hereditary (2018)

Gruesome horror - heartbreaking drama.

[8/10 · 12 October 2019]

This film is so good. It builds up a tragic family drama and adds an unsettling dose of mystery in in a perfect blend. A chill tauntingly runs along your back while you simultaneously feel a sad knot in the stomach. You know something is going on but can't put your finger on it. The film deceives and throws you off the track. It shocks you and makes you uneasy. As the end draws near it gets creepier and creepier and the horror finally kicks in. It doesnt rely on jump scares - this is a clever flick! Great performances throughout. The cast captures and so does the script - great job from the director to tie this bundle of feelings together into a fantastic film. Some viewers complain about the ending. But for those who follow the clues and the foreshadowing the ending should be all but a disappointment. 2hrs7min well spent.

The Fanatic (2019)

Not Arthouse. Just very bad.

[1/10 · 11 September 2019]

All limp. No bizkit! Just because a movie contains a stupid hair cut, mismatched clothing, flaky animations, touches on the topic of autism and is directed by a musician does not in any way make it an arthouse flick! Big fat no no. This is just a very bad movie. Any reviewers giving this a load of stars are wearing Travolta fandom googles and are oblivious to the fact that this flick sucks. It is so bad. Unconvincing dialogue and a makes no sense monologue. Overacted. Did I mention the silly haircut (it frankly owns this film and makes it hard to concentrate on anything else)! Travolta 'needing a poo' line sets the standard (or lack of) in the film's first 5 minutes. This is what to expect. This is what it delivers. To quote other reviewers, this film is so bad it is funny. Not good. Just funny. One simply does not make a movie like this one and expects anyone to take it seriously. It has to be a gag. Because it sure feels like the joke of the year. But. Ultimately funny bad is not funny enough. This cracker gone flabby. Do yourselves a favour and pick something with a crunch. Practically anything else will do.

Bumblebee (I) (2018)

Humblebee

[7/10 · 30 August 2019]

I just really enjoyed this movie. It has heart and a bit soul - a likeable bot and good paced plot. It has also action and a few laughs. It does very well without pouty trout lips and survives on a script that works, acting that is far better than in any of the other Transformer movies, and come on - it's Bumblebee. Whats not to like! The CGI is great. Since the very first T movie I have been blown away by the transformations, and this flick does not disappoint either. So happy this bot (my fav bot by far) got a spin off that does him credit. Watch it.

The Nun (2018)

Just re-watch the Conjuring 2!

[2/10 · 1 October 2018]

In the Conjuring the Nun scared the hell out of me. The creepiest thing on film for a decade at least. So I had pretty high expectations. And was so let down. Did not find this movie scary at all. Cheap scares and non of that chill up your spine that so creeped me out in the Conjuring. Get it on DVD. Acting is OK. But felt like the end scene is chucked in there just to tie things up and make us remember that Oh yeah, the Warrens are still pretty cool. This film is not though.

Twin Peaks (2017)

This is not Twin Peaks! This is a slap in the face!

[2/10 · 11 March 2018]

Did I wait 25 years for THIS??? I am at episode 7 now, and only reason I keep watching is because I hope and pray that the next episode will be better, that it will find it's roots and pick up in pace. Because let's get one thing straight: there's no magic in 2017's so called revival of the show. Just one episode more boring and lacklustre than the previous. Nothing happens. Nothing at all!!!

The story is for the most of the time not even set in Twin Peaks. We're in New York, South Dakota, Argentina... The old cast is mere cameos and the new one brings nothing to the table. It is overacted, underacted, and completely and utterly pointless. Who green-lit this mess???

Can someone please PLEASE explain to me why nobody is taking Coop/Dougie to a doctor??? The guy is walking around as if he had a stroke or five, unable to speak, eat, drink, walk etc - but wifey just keeps yelling at him, and at work a colleague lends him a helping hand or two, and pushes him about the office as if this strange behaviour does not at all call for medical attention. Arrrrgh, it's so dumb!

Will I be able to get through this? I honestly can say! I am a die hard Twin Peaks fan - having watched the original 2 seasons quite a few times since they first aired. I belong to the (un)lucky few who grew up fearing Bob for all eternity! I had the soundtrack on vinyl and boy, did I have a crush on Bobby! I sat like glued in front of the TV and was blown away by one episode, after another, after another. Nothing compared to Twin Peaks!

That is why this is a complete slap in the face. It uses (abuses more likely) fan nostalgia and our love for the show to air pure trash! I give it 2 stars - one is for the music at the end of every episode. It brings back fond memories of Jullee Cruise performing songs like 'Falling' in the old show. The other star is for the original cast who deserve so much better than this failure of a show. They are Twin Peaks.

Fear the Walking Dead (2015–2023)

Rooting for the zombies! (But it's going on me)

[5/10 · 3 December 2017]

First reviewed Dec2017 - then 2/10. Update Jan2020 below. FTWD has been consistent from the very start. Consistently bad. The script is laughable, and fails to deliver one single episode with a believable and engaging plot. The acting is beyond a joke - stale and completely without any charisma. There is none what so ever chemistry between the cast nor their characters. The world is filling up with flesh eating monsters and every single person in the show faces this new threat with dead eyes and a mind boggling stupidity. Every episode is filled with so many dumb decisions that it makes you want to throw your TV out the window. An example; without giving away too much: 'Kid runs off into the desert. Dad decides to go look for kid in the desert. Dad also decides, for some unexplainable reason, to leave the house without putting shoes on! Dad gets very bloody feet. Kid is an unappreciative little prat'.

Compared to TWD where you have a whole bunch of exciting or likable characters, FTWD is the complete opposite. I want the zombies to munch away on every single person in the show, and I want it to hurt! I want them to suffer for their stupidity, carelessness and nonchalance! They cause so many avoidable issues - it does not bring the story forward, it just makes the audience despise the characters! Rooting for the zombies!

The only saving grace, and the only reason I still watch this show, is so I can follow Funny or Die's 'The Most Ridiculous Things From Last Night's FTWD'. The blog rips on the series and its nonsense plots. It turns the failed horror show into top notch comedy. Nowadays I watch TWD for the action, and FTWD for a good laugh. Because you can't, and shouldn't ever, take this show seriously!

Update Jan 2020: I managed to get through season 3 in agony when this series suddenly picked up the pace and became slightly interesting. Despite there's being a petition to get rid of the new writers I have to say this series is finally worth spending some time on. Annoying characters are all long gone thank you very much - Alicia has gone from whiny to kickass and the addition of June and John is nice, truly a heartwarming duo. I am enjoying the crossover of a couple of TWD characters too. Stupid and annoying decisions that made no sense what so ever and was far too common is previous seasons are no longer as frequent. Compared to TWD this series used to dumb and laughable but that is not the case now... I am currently on s05e09 and no more rooting for the growlers as much as before - on the contrary, these folks have started to grow on me and I find myself to actually enjoy quite a few of the new episodes. So hey, bumping this up from 2 stars to 5. I'd like to bump it up a wee bit more but it is early days and it might still stumble and fall flat... because let's face it... it is still eons away from TWD which was massively revived by the oh so wonderfully messed up whisperers.

Justice League (2017)

Entertaining, but still eons from Marvel.

[6/10 · 26 November 2017]

So I didn't hate Justice League. And that is a big step up. I had big problems with Batman vs Superman, as well as with Wonder Woman. Batman's anger issues left me rather dumbfounded in the first, and CGI the was laughable in the latter. However JL kept me entertained and I left the cinema actually looking forward to the continuation, because let's face it, they managed to end it with a pretty good hook (and I am talking about the very end, after the closing credits, so make sure you sit though them). Anyway, let's take it from the start.

Introducing the new characters. A little bit messy and un-engaging. The film tries to be funny but falls pretty flat. I compare it to latest Thor or Spidey flick where the audience laughed out loud constantly. JL got a few hah's or hehe's, maybe a giggle or two. But nobody in the theatre burst out laughing.

The Flash has a naive excitement that perhaps is supposed to woo us and remind us of young Tom Holland aka Spiderman, however The Flash is quite a few years older, so he doesn't come across at all as charming, more a bit dumb. Cyborg's past is briefly hinted but he sort of just shows up all moody and it takes a while to warm up to him. Aquaman, the protector of the sea, is a pesky litter bug; thinking it is a cool move to throw a whisky bottle while walking down a pier, tsk tsk!

The Villain. Aaargh! NOOOO! Not a stale CGI bad guy. Steppenwolf is a big fail and ruined a lot for me. Guardians of the Galaxy (pt1) did the same mistake with Thanos, and it is painful to watch. In Guardians however, Ronan saves the film by being a pretty badass antagonist, as well as a person. Justice League lacks that saving grace. The para demons are better CGI than Steppenwolf, and thankfully there is a lot of them!

The Plot The film moves along in a good pace and there's a lot of action. JL keeps us entertained. A few flaws, like why the hell did NOBODY pay attention to the last mother box? C'mon guys that was beyond sloppy. So yeah, we all knew that Steppenwolf would snatch it at some point, but at least fight him for it...

The Twist Not going to give away too much but... definitely the best part of the film! Well-needed addition to the team. Gave a great boost to the plot as well as to the on-screen chemistry between the actors. Suddenly I found that I actually quite liked The Flash. There was a bit of banter between the characters. I laughed a bit more. I enjoyed everything about the film a bit more. Wise move from the screen writers to add this superhero to the mix.

Overall MUCH more likable than previous DC flicks. OK plot. Great action. The CGI had improved and specially liked scenes with The Flash (even though I think Quicksilver did v e r y similar moves in the X-men saga).

Justice League delivers a good time at the movies, but - it is still miles away from the MCU. The dialogue is more stilted, the sense of humour is hit and miss and Ben Affleck's Batman has the wooden charm of a tree trunk.

Once again, stay until the closing credits! 95% of the cinema goers left the theatre as soon as credits started rolling (something that never happened when going to see a Marvel. It seems DC lacks curious fans who are aware of the fact that there is ALWAYS more to come). The hook for Justice League 2 is a must see. And there is also a good laugh mid credits. Enjoy!

The Punisher (2017–2019)

Stick with it; The Punisher grows and explodes.

[7/10 · 21 November 2017]

I had high expectations as I really enjoyed Frank Castle aka The Punisher when he appeared in Daredevil Season 2. But it took me a while to get into this series. It started off slow, and much more 'chatty' than action packed. I grew rather sick of the 'pretty wife smiling' flashbacks. I even had to re-watch parts of episodes a few times as I lost track, and interest, a little bit.

Then suddenly the plot hooked me, the characters grew on me and every episode felt shorter than the last one, because it just got better and better. By the end we finally get the Punisher that we were introduced to in Daredevil. The tempo is high and blood splatters across the screen? Too graphic? Perhaps. But then The Punisher has always had a different beat that other Marvel comics.

I can however understand the criticism that this series does not belong in the wider MCU, as it does not mention the existence of superheroes and does not relate to it in any way. If feels more like a stand alone show. Which is a shame. However it is still a good series, and should not be disregarded. Perhaps a season 2 will tie The Punisher more closely together to the other characters in the Netflix/Marvel word.

I give it 7/10 because it is a great ride - but the slow start and the lack of fellow superhero mentions means it aims and fires, but it does not quite hit the mark.

Peaky Blinders (2013–2022)

A series that has it all and that always delivers.

[10/10 · 17 November 2017]

This review can be a short one - because there is really just one thing to say; watch Peaky Blinders!

Excellent characters are brought to life through classy acting. Storyline remains Interesting and intriguing in all seasons, there's never a dull moment. The plot has twists and turns and the action hits you in the face, it is wild and beautiful at the same time. The backdrop is gloomy and always visually stunning.

And what a genius move to set it all against the music of industry titans Nick Cave and PJ Harvey. Fits like hand in glove. Heavy tunes that turn your nerves into knots, as you sit on the edge of your seat, wondering what will happen next. Without doubt one of the best shows to ever made.