xhris Reviews

Transformers (2007)

Maybe they shouldn't have..

[6/10 · 28 June 2007]

I'm going to keep this short and simple. Michael Bay who remade Miami Vice saying this was not going to be an 80's staged remake did the same thing with the Transformers. All the real fans were expecting it to stick more to the original and why shouldn't they have kept it more to the original?? I think the original fan base aged between there mid twenties and early thirties is an more interesting audience, revenue-wise, then today's kids.

The movie is definitely putting all it's hopes on the effects. The storyline is slim, lacking depth.

Some specific let downs:

• Optimus Prime's character is plain old weak in the movie and his knowledge which made him stick out back in the days is has come down to some simple one liners. He did not live up to his role as leader of the Autobots.

• I could handle Optimus Prime's 2007 make-over because in basis he looked the same. But the whole Predator-look they gave Megatron 2007 -> what the hell were they thinking?!?

• The faces on the robots were too slick. We're talking about robots people, they should have kept them more mechanical.

• Transforming from a vehicle or animal seemed to take ages while transforming back to this state was just a matter of milliseconds.

• Did somebody order an 2 1/2 hour during GM/Mountain Dew/Panasonic/Nokia/Burger King commercial? Did I miss anyone?

The only reason I gave this a 6/10 is because the effects were great. But I'm still awaiting the 80's remake who really makes use of these pro's and combines these with a solid storyline, great character buildups and

Is this movie going to smash the box offices? Yes! Is this movie pleasing the original fan base? Not by far!

Maybe they shouldn't have..

Dreamgirls (2006)

Two hours and fifteen minutes of Beyonce promotion

[2/10 · 21 December 2006]

I felt like I was one of the lucky ones to get invited to the screening of Dreamgirls because it's due to release over here in the Netherlands on February 22nd, 2007 and I saw it yesterday (December 20th, 2006).

I have to say I'm not much of a musical fan but after I saw the trailer on the Internet a while back the movie actually triggered me to want to see it. As a kid I saw Grease several times, great movie.. but this isn't.

It's two hours and fifteen minutes of Beyonce promotion, who seems to get whiter (make up) by the day. The movie has a very thin storyline which we all saw before in numerous other movies. It's funny to see Eddie Murphy using his well known 'James Brown' SNL imitation voice, and yes the man can sing. But to conclude it was torture, especially Jennifer Hudson's voice.. it's beautiful and all but just TOO MUCH! I left the cinema with ringing ears, I'm serious.

I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer (2006 Video)

Yet another follow up let down.

[1/10 · 10 August 2006]

Yet another follow up let down. Cruel Intentions, Wild Things, Starship Troopers and so on, and so on.. when's the franchise killing going to stop? I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer was a real let down for a fan like me. I loved the first one and I Still Know was pretty good as well although it wasn't written by teen slasher God Kevin Williamson.

I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer is a let down on several fronts, not only bad acting or a weak script but they also fool around with the legend of the fisherman giving the guy immortal powers. There's no mention of the original town where the first part took down and two started in. The way they link this third part to the other two is just pathetic, it seems like the creators never took the time to even see them.

To be short, pure STV stuff.. I guess the studio wanted cash in for one last time on the franchise. They should have left it with I Still Know..

Mini's First Time (2006)

Unpredictable is getting predictable

[7/10 · 5 August 2006]

Although I liked the movie and it's plot. The relationship between father Martin and stepdaughter Mini, on which a great deal of the movie builds, somewhat reminded me of the tension between Kathryn and Sebastian in Cruel Intentions.

Plot twists like in Mini's First Time, Wild Things, Dead Mans Curve.. need I go on were refreshing a few years back. Nowadays the unpredictable twist are getting rather predictable to the regular movie viewer.

And let's be fair maybe looks like Mini's can get you out of trouble in the movies but the writers should have drawn the line somewhere and instead of looks let the whole plot support on more realistic excuses for her to come up with.

Hostel (2005)

This doesn't compare to Saw at all..

[6/10 · 17 January 2006]

Fried air is what the should have called this movie, not Hostel. A typical American bad effects movie which doesn't compare with good thought through movies like for example the first episode of the Saw installment.

It's terrible to see how yet again the Americans think everything over here in Europe and Eastern- Europe is the same. MINOR-SPOILER The movie starts off in Amsterdam, where I'm living myself, and yet again.. just like in Eurotrip and other movies the DO NOT film in Amsterdam and the residents all seem to speak German instead of Dutch. Which, trust me, doesn't sound the same at all! (I'm 1/2 Dutch and 1/2 German myself). And come on people, Amsterdam is a beautiful city with loads of culture and friendly people, all the Americans seem to think about us is that we smoke pot all day long and visit the Red Light district. Trust me all of those things were invited to attract stupid American tourists ;)

Back to the movie. I heard people say this wasn't going to be a horror movie which would look away when something terrible was going to happen..and indeed the camera doesn't look away.. it just goes blurry. Near the end of the movie you've seen so much blood that you don't buy it at all.

So Saw lovers, like myself this doesn't compare to Saw at all.. it has a weak to no story at all and if you watch the trailers and spots you've seen the best part of the movie anyways..