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Reviews
Three Thousand Years of Longing (2022)
interesting beginning, intriguing middle, long and disappointing end
So, just to be clear, the writing for this movie is actually incredible, but the ending is a little bit unbelievable and kind of sucks..what this movie really emphasizes is that Idris Elba can be a force to be reckoned with if the writing of the project that he's on is very exceptional...otherwise he seems to be a very lazy thespian. For this particular film, Tilda Swinton could've been anyone else. She added nothing to the film, and her character was so paperthin in terms of development that it didn't matter who was playing her. I would've rather seen a random British Indian woman upstart in acting. This scored review will likely correlate with the ROTTEN TOMATOES rating which means that it's pretty accurate seeing how on both platforms there is some sort of universal agreement on the quality of this film. It would've got a higher score if it hadn't dragged on for so long; the movie itself felt like it was 3000 years...and if they had casted a more amenable costar. Tilda Swinton was very bleh and not an interesting character at all. Finally, the writing at the end just kind of crumbled apart like an over baked cookie being pulled off the baking pan. The beginning and the middle was just too incredible that they couldn't find a suitable ending to match it appears.
Star Trek (2009)
You need to know why this film is a masterpiece
As a longtime superfan of Star Trek, I must share my thoughts on this film paying homage to the original series. Star Trek, featuring Chris Pine as Kirk, Zachary Quinto as Spock, Zoe Saldana as Uhura, Simon Pegg as Scotty, and many other notable actors not only has a star studded cast, but a truly galactically spectacular writing and film crew. The effects, score, choreography, writing, and acting is all phenomenal. When you first jump into the film, you hear this swelling orchestra with horns and trumpets playing what you will later know to be this version of Star Trek's majestic "theme song" almost as recognizable as the original. This film is not a remake, it is what we Trekkies refer to as the Kelvin timeline. Named after the U. S. S. Kelvin, the ship you see at the very start of the film. This movie is an alternate universe where James Tiberius Kirk did not become the youngest captain of the U. S. S. Enterprise at 25 years old in the normal, respectable way. But somehow the universe bends towards justice and works in astonishing fashion to achieve the same results. Even though the destruction of the U. S. S. Kelvin and death of George Kirk completely altered the timeline, Kirk still manages to enlist in Star Fleet and rapidly meet all the key figures that would comprise his main crew. We see as each member is elevated to the bridge and Kirk's inner circle by reason of exceptionalism and exceptional circumstances. Sulu becomes helmsman because his senior got "lungworms." Cadet Uhura becomes the head communications officer on the bridge of a flagship because the sudden and unusual circumstance of needing someone who can understand Vulcan and Romulan. Bones becomes Chief Medical Officer when his counterpart dies in an attack on the ship. Chekov gets a chance to prove his rare and amazing control of the transporter when Vulcan is attacked. Chief Engineer slot for Scotty opens up when Olson gets reckless in a space jump perishes. Scotty and Kirk become acquainted and close on Delta Vega after both being marooned there. It all comes together, the universe weaving itself around the unnatural gash made in space time. The plot is well written and executed. Each actor has a quirk to make the character that much more special. Pine as the dashing, boyish, risk-taker Kirk; he easily pulls this off with his cool, joking, jovial yet witty attitude. Urban may have overplayed Bones a bit, but I liked it. A doctor who fears everything. Ha! Saldana is great as the soothing, Black woman Uhura; secret charms, mysterious and compassionate and a quiet genius in her own right. Quinto as Spock will forever be celebrated as a stellar and bright display of acting. Pegg is hilarious as Scotty, it was a stellar casting choice. And Cho's portrayal of Sulu is great. The one liners and facial expressions are memorable for their flawless delivery. Even the ending is satisfying. Somehow Tyler Perry didn't overplay his part which is surprising. All in all, 10/10.
Star Trek: The Next Generation: Q Who (1989)
9 because they didn't off Ensign Gomez
This episode would be a solid 10 if it wasn't for the waste of introducing Ensign Sonya Gomez. It would've came together so well if they had her perish in their encounter with the Borg amidst one of the attacks and having this affect Geordi profoundly.
Red Tails (2012)
Bad, bad, bad
How could so many stars come together on so much bad. This is some of the worst acting and props I've ever seen. I wish for better, but none may exist or ever come.
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)
Classless film that should be forgotten
Funky, wonky, tacky, campy film that should be considered non-canoncial to the AVP series. Unknown (forgivable) and unremarkable (unforgivable) actors plunge their souls halfheartly into this spin-off AVP project. And simply terrible props inconsistent with the quality of the Alien series and Predator series, respectively. Story is lifeless as a stone.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
Garbage soundtrack kills this flick
I cannot believe how terrible this film could be in key areas with such support available. Bad soundtrack, mediocre writing and acting. Why can't Sony just give this back to Marvel already? We have suffered enough.
Da 5 Bloods (2020)
Disjointed, discombobulated
Not Spike's best work and a sore waste of talent by those cast. My goodness, what utter trash. Attempts and fails at deepness. So disappointing. Maybe Spike should hang up his directorial hat for the next generation.
Zoo (2015)
characters that earned their deaths
Network television loves producing shows with random and often ridiculous premises and stuffing them with a smorgasbord of unlikable characters played by c-list actors all for a quick buck. clearly tossing whatever at the board and hoping something sticks to get their ratings up. zoo is one of those productions. i can't feel any empathy for these humans and find myself rooting for the animals, jot because i'm a peta activist, but these characters are just that unlikableZ but, hey, if you've got nothing to do...go for it. that's what i did. for approximately three episodes.
Eye for an Eye (1996)
One of the worst revenge flicks
Irresponsible Premise, horrid acting, terrible plot. Death Wish if it was the worst rendition. Sally Field just sucks as an actress, but in this role, it's her worst one yet. Ed Harris is usually great, but he is so lifeless in this flick except for when he gets upset in the kitchen scene. Nobody wants to see Ed Harris as a dad: he's great as a general, a Hardened criminal or cop, but the emasculated father? No. And Kiefer Sutherland as a criminal! No film with KS as a bad guy is ever good. His character had zero depth, just a pure evil idiot who somehow is immune to prosecution. What a dumb flick. It must've had people shaking in their boots when it came out.
Undercover with the Clerics: Iraq's Secret Sex Trade (2019)
The horror at the nexus of patriarchy and religion
This documentary reveals horrible facts about a widespread practice in Iraq facilitated by certain sheikhs and clerics. The phenomenon of "pleasure marriages" run by these religious leaders creates a systemic power imbalance between men and girls and women in Iraq. Pleasure marriages are short-term informal "contracts" in which men can have sex and/or rape women and girls under a religious veil of protection. Even though Iraq civil law says women can only be married at 15, these clerics marry girls as young as 9. These marriages are essentially prostitution as they can be as short as 30 minutes and the middleman (cleric) is paid a fee for the arrangement and the ceremony (which can be done over the phone) as a pimp would be and the girl is also paid sometimes. The problem is this is exploitation because many of the women don't know the marriages are temporary and that they will be discarded and abandoned after the man has sex with her. Women are ostracized by society if they are divorced, have sex outside of marriage, lose their virginity, etc. while men are not held accountable at all. Since women are the only ones who face negative consequences, this practice makes women vulnerable because they have nowhere to go and they are pimped out by clerics undergoing endless "pleasure marriages" until their life ends. It's unconscionable and something needs to be done, but who knows if anything will ever happen. I commend these brave women for speaking out and for the reporters and producers who made this investigation happen.
Atlanta: Teddy Perkins (2018)
Darius meets someone weirder than him
Didn't think it was possible for there to be a character more eccentric than Darius, but it was hilarious to watch!
King of the Hill: Junkie Business (1998)
Never laughed harder in my life
This is the funniest episode yet! Especially the ending.
The Hate U Give (2018)
A movie for whites
I found the plot and execution to be worn and lame. But for non-black people, it's perhaps a perfect introduction to lived experiences they'll never possess.
Friends from College: Party Bus (2017)
So bad but hard to stop watching
I really thought I would stop watching after the disastrous episode four but I was actually interested in seeing these forty year old idiots keep up with their nonsense. It's just hard to pry your eyes away from a massacre. It was partially funny
Friends from College: Mission Impossible (2017)
Jeez, drop the hammer on the head of this cow of a show
This was the worst episode I have ever seen. It was bad, but bearably bad up to episode four. Now I just want to quit it. These characters are written to be so ridiculous and the acting is completely over the top. I just don't understand how a star studded cast could create such hot garbage.
Troy: Fall of a City (2018)
It's just a poor rendition
Everyone seems to be hung up on the fact that there are some black actors and actresses in the show. It's unfair to focus on that, many shows and films whitewash African folklore. Gods of Egypt for example. And this is fiction and it doesn't affect anything at all to take such liberties. That said, the show is horrible because it takes one of the most exciting stories of all time and makes it dull as a bag of rocks. None of the actors are any good at all. Troy with Brad Pitt may not have been accurate, but it was a damn good movie. This series is terrible because they can't remake that magic.