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The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)
Compelled to review
Anybody who is a musician do not watch this. It will make your stomach churn. To take away the thing you love in life so callously and pointlessly makes me sick to the pit of my stomach. It'll take some time to wash away the bitter taste.
At first it is watchable and there are some occasional funny bits but it aimlessly descends into shock value and despair.
And to what end you might ask? There is no end, none whatsoever, nothing a punch in the face would not have achieved with much less fanfare, and we know this character doesn't mind dishing out a box.
The moral of this story? That which is so dullest I shalt make dull of my life to match thous dullness.
I really don't know, make it up, there is no story here.
I've noticed a trend with this directors films having no payoff, same again here. There is no emotional attachment to any character. As many more have said there is no resolution. Wish I had stuck to my guns and not watched this, my gut instinct of the trailer was spot on.
Lastly, the scene with the dim chap declaring his love was utter cringe, as I watched I declared it should have been cut. It was ridiculous and the payoff from it was utterly pointless.
The Social Dilemma (2020)
Less entertaining 'Branded' with Interviews
TLDR: This film is 'Branded' in Documentary form!
Firstly, This film is good. Might be a bit on the melodramatic side for the subject matter it discusses but no matter, I won't delve into the psychology or try to pretend I understand any of it.
What is evident is that these companies are vying for your time and these applications are addictive. The message is to reclaim all your lost time(In essense your soul). My own obsession was slowly becoming a mix of Quora(A bunch of nobodies proclaiming wikipedia articles they had quickly summarised), instagram and twitter. Half an hour of scrolling here, half an hour of scrolling there, what harm??
It's easy to associate with the issues mentioned in the documentary. It's also evident that people's opinions are generally supported by google searches. I've relayed people info which they look up briefly on google to immediately have a solid stonewall opinion without spending more than ten seconds researching the topic, this is frustrating on many levels. One can no longer have an informed conscious conversation with someone else's educated and considered opinion. Instead you can only have an informed semi conscious conversation with Google.
On to Branded, a Russian film made in 2012 that has struck me as having a greater sense of clarity and foresight having watched the social dilemma, like, wow, they just hit every nail on the head, the time consumption, the mindlessness of modern consumption, even the great big leeches!! And the most exciting brand war ever put to screen!! That film did not quite have the nuance to pull off the same message perhaps, or maybe just because it was Russian it doesn't make it onto our algorithms?
But If I had one complaint with the social dilemma it is they should have just screened clips from Branded in place of the 'subtle' Dramatisation they have here!
The Imitation Game (2014)
More Propaganda....
First off, the historical revisionism is testament to the pure and brazen ignorance of the production crew and lack of an historical adviser when this went into production, with the almost terrifyingly obtuse view to making a film that follows the cheap tried and tested Hollywood formula that we've all witnessed a hundred times already.
From the paper boy waving a paper saying bombs were about to be dropped in '1939', to god only knows how many facets of fantasy created out of a well documented Turing's life, and I can't remember accurately right now but I think they even mentioned Churchill as being Prime Minister in 1939 which is untrue, this film was an exercise in inaccuracies.
These inaccuracies I was quite prepared to forgive until I started witnessing the exact same structure of film as I would be expected to see in a comic book film. We introduce an antagonist who causes great conflict, we already know our protagonist who is a victimised target of bullies and the entire world is out to shoot him down but he must overcome great odds to beat a much more powerful enemy. We even witness the classic buddy moment where our heroes at their lowest ebb have a motivational coming together of understanding and mutual respect where their bond of friendship gives them renewed vigour and hope, and not least of all, the power to overcome their great enemy, 'The Commander'. Not to mention of course that this film even managed to chuck a twist into the mix as well. Sure, it wouldn't be a Hollywood style film without a twist now would it?
Add a couple of scenes that are so fake it'll make your head spin and you've got your film, e.g. 'his brother just happens to be on that exact boat!!??' Good grief, give me a break.
This sickened me to the core of my being. Can film makers really not appreciate that people have more intelligence than that of a wombat. I'm starting to feel like a zombie whose soul reason in life is to watch the same generic film again and again and again with the odd good film thrown in like a needle in a hundred haystacks. Originality isn't even worth speculating about anymore, it's a myth that died a death with cuchulainn.
It was such a bad ploy to create this absolute ass of a character and then have us empathise with him because the world is against him. It doesn't even try to speculate that he might bring it on himself. 'Just get the damn audience to EMPATHISE' said the director, I presume. There isn't much in the way of character here, he's an ass, played very well by Cumberbatch who can do no wrong at the moment it seems, but very one dimensional a character nonetheless, Oh yes, they try to get him to change and get along with everyone which he does, but just so we could have our great comic book buddy scene where the evil 'Commander' is put in his place until the next episode of Turing and Friends when the Commander tries to destroy the world with his next fiendish plot.
And what was with all the gay apologies at the end? I thought this film was about Enigma. I use the phrase 'about Enigma' quite quite loosely here since this film had very little resemblance to reality. But almost all the blurbs were about him being gay, and other gays and how they were mistreated. I'm sorry, was this film not about Enigma? Clearly not, they must have been afraid that people wouldn't want to see a film about a gay man? Looks that way.
So yea, I was disappointed with this, just didn't care about the main character, too much empathy mining was going on here. Not to mention the ridiculously simplistic way in which they supposedly cracked the code. But like I've said, dumbed down cinema for easy digestion.
La montaña sagrada (1973)
A boring art house film delivering the wrong message
What can you say about such a film? Some liken it to art, but as another reviewer said all film is art so that is not an appropriate justification. There is good and bad art and you'll have to do better than you just don't 'get' it. I hate when people have to justify that they 'got' a film before criticizing it.
This film is on the most tasteless level of film making. I think people have fooled themselves into liking it. I almost did, I really had to think about the rating I would give this for a while. In the end I based my decision on the emotional impact, nil, and the amount of depraved muck I had to watch to 'get' the satire, the satire being the redeeming factor of the film for me until I realised that it wasn't satire at all. It was glorification of debauchery. In films that satire a particular group such as the politicians in Dr. Strangelove we see them as inept fools and know exactly the people in real life they reference. At no point do any of the nine depraved rich come across as fools or can they be referenced to a particular person in reality. Only the Jesus character comes across as a fool. The other fools portrayed in the film are actually the normal people, i.e. you and me, who buy into the nine's images and marketing strategies. The audience. And that sickens me to the core. That he mocks the people of the world while at the same time the film is lauded by those same people buying into it's 'image' even when it is so obviously gross and depraved.
So the evil rich at the end gain enlightenment or truth, while the rest of us wallow in the mire forevermore. A purely evil theme if ever I've seen one and obviously I can't get behind that.
I probably went into this film way too open minded first time around, to the point where I had convinced myself I just needed an open mind to enjoy it. I had a chuckle at the art (satire?) scene where asses paint the new 'masterpieces'. But for a two hour film with only one memorable scene, the scene that is probably an allegory for the film that presented it, that's not good enough.
My conclusion is that unlike real art from the renaissance period where artists tried to capture the real world as perfectly and beautifully as possible, the same can be said of poetry trying to capture emotion or books trying to create fantastic adventures etc, this would be art, however, the advent of 'modern' artists in both the painting world and the cinema world has left an ongoing legacy of pure muck on canvas and film reels parading as art, this film achieves nothing artistically, it is not moving and emotional, it is not epic, it is not beautiful, it's not even entertaining for most of it, it's just a shock to the system for most people and fear of calling down the wrath of the critics or for being called out for not 'getting' it people laud its brilliance. This sort of 'art' is forced and is clearly not made to inspire and invigorate the soul and for all these reasons I'm out.
Even if this was art, what can we compare it with in our own experience to say that it is beautiful, there is no reference point in reality for something like this, not like a symphony stirring up emotions, or the awe of amazing landscape or portrait paintings or an uplifting or sombre story. This has none of the above, If this is solely an intellectual film, then I say to all these pseudo intellectuals to go out and get a PHD in physics or something and stop convincing us of your great intellect by saying you 'get' this utter nonsense.
Tekken: Buraddo benjensu (2011)
Possibly just for the tekken fans.... If even.....
From the point of view of someone who has only come across the game fleetingly in the past and not really cared whether the film turned out bad or good either way, other than for my own entertainment value I suppose, It has to be said that I found this film woefully wanting.
I can only assume that tekken fans liked this simply because of the 15-20 fight scene at the end and from what I've learned it sticks close to the story of the game.
To be honest, it was awful, i thought this was going to be an action film but it turned into a bore snoozefest pretty quickly. OK, a number of problems 1). What exactly do they think an untrained teenage girl can do for them? Oh yes, and lets throw a knife at her head at point blank range for the fun of it. She should be dead, film over. 2). She's asked to find out what she can?, I swear, this is the worst reason for getting someone to do anything. What does this mean, find out that he is gay or straight?, find out where he lives? find out what he eats for dinner? Find out what they presumably already know, that he is an 'immortal person'? Moving on. 3). Look everyone, An immortal kid is jumping off a building. Now everyone already knows what he is, so, eh, i feel embarrassed pointing this out because it's so stupid, but, Jin, jin's father and grandfather, he's over there, get him, film over. 4).Between 30-45 mins of teenage girls whining, enough said, moving on. 5). Why was there some guy in the shower with shin????? Quickly moving on 6). How does shin know that the two girls are agents? 7). Robot grows feelings... Enough said, moving on 8). Weirdo teacher just happens to find them in the woods, creeper or what? 9). Shin is immortal but dies in two seconds, film over, oh wait. 10). they killed off the main character this film was revolving around and then dumped him like a rag doll, just, what??? 11). Cheesy 15 minute fight scene for tekken lovers, the only redeeming factor I would think for many. 12). Cheesy fight scene has typical good guy gets ass whupped for a few minutes before remembering that he can fight and starts ass whupping the bad guys. 13). Let me just fly around aimlessly here for a while dodging the giants arms swinging just to give the studio more time for this completely pointless fight scene before I remember I have this giant laser that's all bad ass and cool and will rip my enemies to pieces. 14). So why was heihachi in hiding.... 15). Why was shin so sure he could lure heihachi out of hiding? 16). Why didn't someone just kidnap him one day as he went to school. Would have saved us this complete dross. 17). Typical Japanese moral at the end about humans fighting, blah blah. 18). 'I know you'll come for me some day, I'll be waiting', This line was just as bad as batman's 'I know there's good in you', Completely pointless and you're left wondering what the character is seeing that the audience can't.
Anyway, absolutely awful, couldn't believe how bad this was.
Starman (1984)
Not Great....
This should have a 5 point something score as opposed to the dizzying heights of a 6.9, for what is essentially a somewhat laughable romantic (comedy) about a mentally challenged alien.
The first quibble I have with this film is Jeff Bridges acting, at first, the ridiculous speech patterns of the alien are quite funny, and perhaps people liked that and can empathise with a charming, delightful but ultimately not quite all in the head extra terrestrial. After a while however I found it grating and annoying. Why can he not learn to speak properly? He figures everything else out without too much trouble but speaking seems beyond him. Even if we assume that his species don't use the medium of tongue flapping and instead communicate through their minds this doesn't explain his awkwardness using a tongue, he gets to grip with legs, arms, eating, pretty much every function he probably didn't have before this movie begins he picks up in no time at all. OK, so he has those little head twitches which show he is not comfortable using a neck I presume. So why isn't he stuttering using his knee joints or any other myriad number of joints the human body has to offer. If this had been done right there would have been a progression throughout the film of him coming to terms with all the human faculties, but the ones they decided to let him struggle with leave us with an endearing? alien. He had the means to learn the language before he went to earth so why didn't he?
The dark descent into ridiculousness continues when he uses his magic 'balls' to uproot a few trees to scare off a guy shouting at him, to bring a deer back to life, and of course the lonely heroine. He doesn't think to use a ball to knock around the guys beating him up at the diner? He doesn't have any sense of self preservation which is essential to the survival of any species, speeding through the lights even though a lorry is bearing down on him. They have presumably evolved to a point where nobody dies but this is inherently ridiculous, and just paves the way for some bible bashing for the rest of the movie about how primitive and barbaric we are. It's easy for him to give his self righteous garbage about no living thing needing to die since he doesn't need to eat to survive. Let's all be vegetarians?
Then we descend further into the murky abyss of ridiculousness with him apparently being able to tell the future of his unborn son who was conceived only the previous night using at least some of his magic 'balls' I presume. Then we learn that the lovable, preachy, deers have a right to life alien is in favour of abortion. Now this is murky water, but I think the moral ground liberals propose that abortion is alright is that the baby isn't actually alive, but it sure as hell smudges the moral lines when you know the child's entire future, suggesting that yes, the child is actually alive but this alien doesn't care. I presume that this is how his species who never die keep a firm grasp on population control on their planet. Their generation has an iron grasp on life and they aren't giving it up for future generations for anything, not even the right to life that he's been magnanimously drawling on about subtly throughout. It's almost as if someone with a strong pro abortion agenda wrote and produced this film as a mass pro abortion campaign. I guess we'll never know.
Then he magically turns a quarter into a small fortune without using any sort of ball at all this time, by going into the nearest casino. Must have been lucky I guess. That ridiculous government guy is as cheesy and as forced a baddie character as I've ever seen. Then we get some more sloganeering at the end to give the false sense of something deep and meaningful. The sheer lack of anything having happened in this movie is offset by an overly zealous government official who gets the national guard out of bed to give the audience some helicopters to look at. At the very end you are left wondering why in god's name he even bothered to come to earth at all. He didn't do or talk to anyone important at all. You'd swear his mission was to impregnate the woman and leave since that's all he accomplished.
All in all, a very average movie which I felt compelled to review since I don't understand the amount of positivity this is getting. Maybe Jeff Bridges nomination convinced a few people that this was a good performance and not what it actually is. An outrageously over acted and ridiculous film with every cheesy stereotype in the book for good measure.