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theshadowoftheghost
Reviews
Sanctum (2011)
Save your money.
Don't even bother watching this if it's on TV unless you like to laugh at poor movies. This film was really bad. There's no articulate response I can give here; it's just bad. James Cameron shouldn't have even put his name down for this. You can see a few Avatar-esque shots and even the soundtrack remains vaguely reminiscent of the film with the blue people, but overall, this film does nothing for him and just shuns his name into a bad pit of despair. He was exec.producer, not producer or director. Seriously, the acting from all is dire from all except the main bloke (the dad- see? I don't even remember their names and I watched this yesterday- that shows how bad it is), and even then he's pretty mediocre, and there is no substance to the story or relationships between the characters. The best parts of the film consist of scenes with just the father and son, and even then the film falls flat. The confining environments do not offer a claustrophobic atmosphere as the blurb on the DVD cover would have you believe, it instead just confines the plot and variation in the story. The expensive cameras used in filming wont save this dud. It has an extremely unsatisfying ending and shouldn't be given the light of day, let alone the time. Leave it in the sanctum of the bargain bin never to be found. In fact, bargain bin's too much of a nice term to use here, "bargain" being an inappropriate word.
The Truman Show (1998)
Brilliant.
If you can't give something 10/10 to, what can you? This is an excellent film in so many ways. It's heart-warming, inspiring and tear-jerking at times. I was going to give it a 9, but this is exactly what movies should be about: originality, ambition, great directing & acting, and an immersion into a world built up within it. Truman Show has all those qualities. This is something that has never been done before. Those of you who want to take something philosophical away from this film and look into it deeply will find you can do just that; it's deep enough to incite thought, and those of you who just want to sit through a feel-good movie with a few twists and turns that will leave you gripped need look no further. I think this was the first time we saw Carrey shy away from comedy, and although there are parts of his humour that shine through, the film is all the better for it. He plays this part perfectly, right through to its epic climax. His humour is not utilised in this film to give his center stage and an open floor to be as silly as he can, instead this film allows you to laugh with him, and not feel as if you're watching a stand-up show. The rest of the cast are perfect, fitting in well, including Ed Harris as the "director". He surprised me here, because he is just the "right" amount of his usual badass self, mixed with some emotion and empathy. This is definitely an original concept, and executed well. I haven't seen this film in a few years yet still remember much of it. You won't be disappointed.
Inside Man (2006)
Great thriller.
This is a good title, all in all. It plays itself just right in thriller terms, being quite reminiscent of Phonebooth or perhaps The Negotiator in pace. The plot is nothing we haven't seen before, but it tries to tell us that story in using forks in the road we haven't often been down. It's final twist is smart, if not slightly expected, but will leave many satisfied with a good ending. Washington is his usual self, great acting, but it's nothing we haven't seen him in before. Owen again, pretty generic, but no one is hit-and-miss in this film, everything plays out consistently and there are enough comic moments to ensure an ease from the tension and strife. I sound clinical, but really, this is a good film, definitely worth watching. It doesn't have that special something that Phonebooth or The Negotiator does, but it is a good attempt at a keep-you-guessing thriller. 7/10 from me.
The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009)
Worth watching, nothing special.
I was tempted to give this film a 7/10 just for the performances of Travolta and Washington, but I expect nothing less than great acting from those two anyway, so settled with a 6 because the film itself, whilst definitely watchable, doesn't carry a huge deal of substance. I haven't seen the original, so I'm judging it from an outsider's perspective. As mentioned, Travolta is great, and Denzel plays his usual self, a worried, yet seemingly always in-control and reassured bloke (possibly a bit overdone in this instance?). We aren't really presented with any twists or ultimately exciting variants in plot, other than what can be expected from a film like this. It's a decent thriller, will keep you interested until the end, but that's only for Washington and Travolta value. The plot itself is mediocre and plays out very predictably. Negotiator or Fugitive, this ain't. Certain people (the young guy and girl on the laptop) are annoying but most of the cast hold up as believable and compelling enough to watch. You won't count this up there in your favourite films of all time, but it's worth a go if you see it on TV or something.
Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son (2011)
Dull as expected.
This film falls flat with every joke. As mentioned by someone before, you may smirk occasionally if this is your sort of thing, but this isn't even worth renting. Easily forgettable and a regurgitation of the previous instalments. Save your time and money. The themes in this are clichéd and ripped straight from every other teen movie with the whole "undercover" while getting in on the ladies' dressing rooms type-thing going on. Very outdated and I would recommend White Chicks over this any day, that's actually got some spirit to it. I think Martin Lawrence tries too hard with his comedy, I've never really liked him, but that's just my opinion. He's not a "funny" guy and can never get the balance right between action/police cop star and comedian. The Wayans brothers are "funny" and pull it off naturally.
Dumb and Dumber (1994)
Perfect comedy.
This is Jim Carrey at his peak and will not be, since it is very much him doing what is completely HIM, to everyone's taste. But you are surely the one person who has made a mistake if you've watched this film and disliked it without realising it's called "Dumb and Dumber"?. I will TRY and keep this brief (impossible), but this is one of my all-time favourite films and for good reason. The same way I have given Lord of the Rings the title of my favourite fantasy adventure movie, Star Wars the Sci-Fi favourite, and so on and so on, is the same way I put this among my top-ten of comedies ever. The duo of Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels is one of the best comedy match-ups since John Candy and Steve Martin. Both are dumb as each other in equally dumb ways but this truly is NOT a "dumb" movie. It's heart-warming, ridiculous and it's a proper journey of friendship and male-bonding. I won't go into the plot, but imagine the best road trip you could ever go on with your best mate, filled with memories you will never soon forget (for better or worse). THAT is this film.
The comedic timing is perfect. The choreography captures the scenery beautifully as they trawl from Rhode Island to Aspen, and I don't think the Farrelly brothers have ever made a film as great as this. I mean, the humour is perfect. The crass and gross moments aren't tastelessly done like in something like American Pie or some teen flick, this is smart yet incredibly thick! If you don't cry laughing at the kind of scrapes these two get themselves into, you've dislocated your funny bone. And serious applause is due to Daniels who isn't overshadowed by Carrey. As a big Carrey fan, I've never found anyone as funny or able to pull off dumb and wacky humour the way he is, but Daniels is the only person I've ever seen who works in perfect harmony with him, and with Jim being the big man of comedy himself, that is no easy feat. Daniels, I truly commend you for that. He confessed he never did a film like this, ever. And for someone I will always remember for Arachnophobia, he was outstanding and I could not imagine a better casting choice. A real shocker of a role for him, but acted flawlessly. The laughs just keep coming, and it tugs at your heartstrings at just the right moments.
As a side note, the soundtrack is also a great selection of memorable tracks that suit each mood accurately and work very well with the action on screen.
There's really not a bad thing I can say about this film. If you haven't seen it, well... You're dumber than dumb.
Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)
You can see the light, but it's mainly on the dark side.
There are spoilers in this.
Shia is getting better with every film. His comic timing is genius and he really is young talent. He's emotional in the right way, pulls us in and you sympathise with him and his relationship to the Autobots. The action scenes are becoming slightly easier to handle, with less of that crappy shaky-camera effect and the actual CGI on the Transformers has been improving since the first meaning we're starting to see more human features on them in comparison to what we've seen previously- just a clunk of metal making noises. They're getting slightly more colourful because I think Bay realised that some things were indistinguishable.
The CGI is, of course, amazing being a multi-million dollar film and we had a few nicer long shots that let you soak all of the battle scenes in rather than meshing it all up into a headache of an eyesore.
And that's all I have to say that's positive.
On the negative side of this moon, it's gloomy. Megan Fox's replacement is tripe, to be frank. She can't act to save her life and even Megan "one facial gesture" Fox does a better job, it's sad to say. Their relationship was more believable.
Rosie's brilliant acting skills are obviously not why she was chosen for the role. Inconsistency seems to be a major factor in this film with a few things. One minute she's whipped on her boyfriend and the next minute she's saying she can't deal with it, then she's riding off with him again. A blonde, dopey maiden who's in dire need of saving and can't do anything for herself. And Bay, the black-on-black, epic "homey slap" between two characters who have been given no back-story were palm-to-forehead moments. I thought we'd come a long way from stereotypes, but obviously not. Anyway, more inconsistency with the battle at the end: explain to me how Optimus Prime fights Sentinal Prime and nearly loses, then a fully-pumped and rested Megatron pulls him apart no problem, but then Optimus leaps up and rips Megatron open, easy-as-you-like? I hate that in films so thanks, Bay. I was kind of expecting an epic battle between the old foes to finish off the series, but we don't get that. Instead we get one of the most gruellingly tedious action montages that I've seen in recent years right up from when they're in the falling building to when the Primes start fighting. That whole last section lasted for a good twenty minutes or more. You could have had an extra few scenes with Megatron and Optimus to really delve into their history and friend/rivalry relationship (Magneto/Prof. X style). Bay's got no respect for the original program and displays this well.
Also, Hugo Weaving IS NOT Megatron. I cannot forgive Bay for this. What is even more bizarre is that Frank Welker, Megatron's original voice actor, took up on his old role for the first two video games of the movies AND did the voices for Soundwave and Shockwave in the last two films! Bay, where is your logic? I wouldn't even let him into my studio if he wasn't reprising his old role. It's a travesty because Optimus was given his nostalgic privileges, so why not Welker? For true fans of the original series, it's a major let-down and since we get some more dialogue from Megatron in this film, it's a distraction for those already familiar with the Decepticon they know and love. When I heard Soundwave and Shockwave, even I thought, "Wow, that sounds like the original Megatron".
Anyway, forgive an old fan's rant. I love Weaving, but not as Megatron. When I saw the scene between Starscream and Megatron, with him complaining at him as he always did, it felt good and reminiscent of what I loved about Transformers, but that was short-lived because then I had to endure some completely stupid and nonsensical scenes with Ken Jeong just there for "let's rinse out a popular actor of today" factor. His performance was funny as hell, as he is a funny guy, but it felt wrong for this movie. But nothing was more awkward than John Malkovich being a stern boss to someone who play-fights with Bumblebee the next... And don't get me started on the wealth of inconsistencies in the plot. It's just convolution handed out in droves. Bay, you're a confused, greedy and selfish man. As mentioned earlier, I can't stand inconsistency like this.
The movie actually starts off pretty well, in fairness. The plot seems as if it's going somewhere and that Bay isn't afraid to show the more "human" qualities of the robots. The Autobots make their trademark cliché phrases and stuff, and even Starscream sounds fearful of Megatron again, which he didn't in the previous two films which I thought was brave of Bay and it paid off. There are some interesting "cover-up" tangents, but it soon very quickly loses any momentum it had and then you realise it's the same old crap. Very pointless.
Anyway, everyone's a critic and you may have thought it was the best film of the year so far. I thought the film was entertaining enough if you want a decent action movie, minus that really long stretch of tediousness near the end, and was impressive on a visual scale (didn't see it in 3D because I don't believe in giving these companies money for something that hasn't worked since the '40s and probably never will- 3D is useless and gives me a headache) but was a 5 (6 at best) as a standalone movie, but overall, I gave it 4. Two stars for CGI, one for an OK action movie if you're not a Transformers fan and one extra for some MINOR improvements.
Call of Duty: Find Makarov (2011)
Hmm... Call this a preview.
For an independent, low-budget film, it looks surprisingly hopeful. But from what I've seen from the trailer, Ghost doesn't look very convincing (not manly enough) and Price's accent sounds ridiculous. Americans just can't seem to get the accent right, it changes from posh English ("Open this door!") to like, South African or something. It really sounds a bit stupid sometimes. But Shephard looks pretty good. From the looks of the FPS viewpoint they're utilising, it looks like it will make this the first film that will get it spot-on, rather than embarrassing. Let's wait and see. Just thought I'd write this now. But well done to the team for giving it a go and recreating the set in such a realistic way. Just expect a few cringe-worthy scenes along with some impressive ones.
Gnomeo & Juliet (2011)
Your kids would get more laughs out of Cannibal Holocaust.
Where do I begin on how dire this film is? This is my first review for any film on IMDb, and to start, can I just mention that I have never... NEVER, IN MY LIFE... walked out of a film in the cinema within the first ten minutes. I mean, seriously, it's that bad. OK, I'll admit, I'm not a child, admittedly (some would disagree there, though), but I will argue against anyone who says that you should be aware this is a film for children and you wont get much out of it if you go in expecting an "A grade" film. I'm sorry, but those excuses wont wash with me when you have to pay almost a tenner for a movie that was heavily advertised as being funny and "up-to-Disney standards" and then you find out you have to pay even more for the sodding 3D glasses. If you were buying El Chupacabra from Woolworth's old value range of DVD's, then yes, it can be used as an excuse. From the very beginning of this film, it was clear that the humour was intended for a young audience... but I didn't realise they intended it THAT young. Seriously, the humour wouldn't be out of place in an episode of Bob the Builder or something, and regardless of what people say, that IS surprising to someone who expects to be entertained whether they are an adult or not. The excuse of, "well, it's a kid's film, what was you expecting" just doesn't sit with me, because all you have to do is look at Toy Story, Aladdin, Shrek, Lion King, Finding Nemo, etc. They appeal to all ages and DO include subtle and funny (key word: FUNNY) references to more "adult" comic themes. I genuinely thought that I would be granted with something even remotely giggle-worthy. I really enjoy kid's animations, and I expected SOMETHING, at least, from this. I think it was terribly misleading that it was advertised the way it was. From the trailers (which were moderately funny), I thought I'd be treated to one of those little gems which were pleasing on the eye, conscious of all age groups in the audience and quite funny to watch. Anyway, the voice acting was adequate, but again, belonged, in terms of style and delivery, to one of CBBC's programmes. But I feel, on a serious note, that the film just lacked any kind of spark, given some of the talent that was attributed to it (ie. Michael Caine, Jason Statham, etc.). It ran dry really quickly, and the script (regardless of its boundaries due to it being based off of the original tale) wasn't up to much. It was wholeheartedly, a flop. Seriously, a flop. But ya know, who am I to judge? I didn't get through more than ten minutes of it. And I've seen some terrible films. I actually had to request to see The Fighter instead. I even MADE money from seeing this, how funny is that? I got the money refunded from the ticket and got 50p profit after buying the next one. But to save any amount of my dignity, I really am not one of those fun-sapped old gits, I really can have a laugh at a lot of films, especially animation, but this was poor. On a side note, the 3D was pointless and gave me a bloody headache. I hate this trend of everything having to be in 3D when it just doesn't work. It's all for money, and it's just a shame. The only ones that worked for me were Up in 3D and Toy Story 3.