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Mrcheeks
Reviews
Straw Dogs (1971)
THE WORST FILM I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!!
The plot is simply all over the place because it has no real plot. The dialog is absolutely awful and the characters behavoir is so absurd you would assume neither could ever have found success in love or career.
The rape scene is simply twisted and disturbing being the wife actually half wants the sex from the first guy and puts up a feeble fight though enjoys it an unbuttons his pants!! ...the second man however undoubtedly rapes her. There really is no point to this scene other than to try to convey a woman can be forced into sex while enjoying it??!? I MEAN WTF IS THAT?!!?!
From this point in the film we go into a tale spin of chaos and nonsense.
There was no point to this film WHATSOEVER!!!!
This is THE worst film I have ever scene.
I am dumbfounded anyone could think tis film brilliant OR entertaining.
What half retarded sicko could like this movie?!
BLAH!
G vs E (1999)
This Show Kicked Serious ASS!!!
This show was awesome. It was about ppl who had sold their souls to demons and the guys who were recruited to save them. Only thing was though, these guys were dead and brought back by a special agency. PPL who knew them weren't able to recognise them so they were free to roam the streets.
It was ORIGINAL, funny and well made. I hate it when shows like this get cancelled yet garbage like MTV's "Real World" will still be on when I'm dead!
The storyline was great and each episode had us begging for more. I really hated when this show would end and I had to wait a week for another one.
RELEASE THIS BABY ON DVD!!!!!
Dead at 21 (1994)
It was a contest that was a lie held by MTV
Although I thought this show was in fact quite good, there was a huge lie behind it that was never addressed.
MTV held a contest where the winner would ge their own show, Dead AT 21.
Jack Noseworthy who played the lead was already a working actor. This did in fact fool some ppl for a very short amount of time until they remembered him or heard by word of mouth, this guy was already an actor.
The contest wasn't even fixed, it was a complete lie! Now I think they may have given the winner a 5 minute part in the first episode or a later episode, but this was not in fact the prize promised.
Why MTV turned into such a sleaze ball network I'll never understand other than the ppl who owned it are greedy just like the owners of every other corporation.
The Punisher (2004)
THE DOLF LUNGREN ONE IS WAAAAAAAAAAAY BETTER, this one smells of Hollywood BS
If there is a sequel hopefully it is better and they keep the same guy for the lead. He was fine but the script was complete sh1t. This movie was simply AWFUL!!!!!!!!!
We just saw his family murdered and him come back to take vengeance.
I wanted to see the darkness born into the character. See him while he recovered and he went through the turmoil of emotion that made him change.
He isn't the same man he was before his family was murdered and basically in 30 seconds of scenes he is suddenly back, healed and a new man that is out for revenge.
This was a kids movie. There was nothing dynamic about the plot or character development.
I think they ruined any hopes of a QUALITY series of Punisher movies.
It's like they took a really bad late night B action movie script about a mans revenge, and ripped off the Punisher so they could release it in theaters on a national and regional level. Lot's of expensive explosions, fancy special effects and high quality camera work.
Hollywood needs nothing more than that to sell a movie to kids, that if it were a toy, it would break in the first 20 minutes.
I HATE how they used that Hollywood hype where they kept the movie very secretive like and had very dark trailers like this was going to be one of the biggest movies of the year......like we would have a killer new action series to follow.
Instead we got the same recycled bullsh1t used in B-movies and over budgeted, under scripted major film studio releases.
PEEEEEE EEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!!
Running Time (1997)
Not enough time but I liked it
This movie is a must see for aspiring film makers. It's goal was to make a diverse film while trying to show movies are an art form within their own right.
I didn't appreciate this movie until about 70% of the way in though. The story was original but at the same time a rehash of a dozen bank robbery scenarios we've all seen. Everything that could go wrong does, our two main bad guys fight a lot and people start dying.
But that was only on the surface. The robbery storyline needs to be overlooked and the three main characters given our focus. Towards the end of the movie we begin to see they are much more dynamic than assumed. It's at this point where the story takes second stage and the dynamics of Carl, Patrick and Janie truly come forward.
I liked the artistic sense this film had a lot and being made to feel as if it was one continuous camera shot beginning to end was very cool. Some scenes had that old black and white feel and line delivery of the classics.
It did leave something to be desired though. For a low budget indi film it was great and I really feel the plot and characters had a lot more to offer. This would be an excellent movie to make a larger budget version of such as which was done with Desperado.
I think the biggest problem was trying to capture elements of much older movies and everything being done in one take. The supporting characters should have been developed more which would of allowed for a longer movie. A little work on the script here and there plus more willingness to do more than one take for scenes could have made it the success the low budget B&W film Clerks was....honestly the genres weren't too far off.
As a true film lover, indi film maker or simply a Bruce Campbell fan it's well worth seeing but best without expectations.
Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)
Slapstick Element in Martial Arts Fight Scenes make for an AWFUL movie
Here we have Quentin Tarantino's latest attempt at the success he had with Pulp Fiction. This movie was so awful I should have asked for my money back and in fact by federal law they must refund your money!! (Maines Implied Warranty Act)
The combat scenes were such slapstick they just ruined the movie.
For anyone with an IQ over whats average, 100-110, this is a hard sale.
.....but that's average meaning the majority of our population falls within that measure. So he had no trouble finding an audience!!!
The story was good but just here and there could have used work. Overall I can't bash the storyline. Nice work Quentin and Uma.
But Quentin soon you will have this reputation with REAL movie fans as a B movie maker that makes s***ty B movies. That's not good.
Only lack of an imagination could have you liking or buying into this movie it's so awful! The action scenes just ruined it overall.
The scene where Luci Lui gets the top of her head cut off yet her brain is exposed is just STUPID. I mean suspension of disbelief is a given for any movie but for those of use with over half a brain YOU ARE ASKING TOO MUCH. END OF STORY.
Dude just break down and make a prequal to Pulp Fiction. I mean at least STICK WITH WHAT YOU KNOW. ....keep the slapstick out of martial arts movies because I think they are a genre you could really be successful in.
Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)
AN "Out There" Masterpiece
I must start by simply saying I loved this movie. I was expecting more action but honestly it didn't need it. Bruce Campbells performance was hilarious which to me shows his range as an actor full throttle now....granted you have seen most of his work.(X-Files episode is great example of this)
The story takes place in a nursing home where a mummy is sucking the souls of the...barley living, to continue his existence. Telling you any more than that would quite frankly ruin this movie for you. The storyline, characters and form of comedy would be too easy to spoil if I prepared you for any of it.....your response to the opening joke seems it was intended for you to guage whether you are going to "get" this film or not.
Don Coscarelli has simply made a really great movie that I am sure is to be a cult classic. If you buy it which I'm sure you will, granted you like it, get the DVD so you don't wear it out!
I'm not sure if this film would even be considered an indi film but I'm guessing so. I wish the crap we get in theaters nationally was more creative like this movie.
I also really liked the score of this film. From the first second I heard a chord I knew it had been done by Brian Tyler who scored Six String Samurai.
I give it a 10
Walker, Texas Ranger (1993)
Family Programing
Yeah the show is really bad but some how I still really like it(in reruns that is) because it's so out there and I simply absorb it as entertainment nothing more. The story lines are simply ridiculous and everything is just so convinient you would need a serious head injury not to see what's coming next.
A bar is gettin shaked down by some gangsters? Well Walker will just send in his two best undercover rangers and there just so happens to be a bartender and waitress job open. The one plot that really cracked me up one time was with the guys that wanted to execute a country music pair and sell the video tape of their last performance and deaths. ....Is Texas really full of criminals this retarded???
Story lines like this is what got this show ignored by so many. That and the laughable acting and action scenes. Sometimes when Chuck is fighting it goes so slow and square that it's like he's actually trying to teach you step by step how to execute a series of combos with a super spinning, jumping finishing kick to your enemy.
At least the show is entertaining and is geared to have good morals and family values which would make it a show suitable for the really young ones and bareable/laughable for us really old kids.
It may have lost a lot of viewers but to last 9 seasons it obviously found and kept an awful lot too. Though the show was poor in many ways, it wasn't meant to be taken seriously or as some well thought out, thought provoking series about real Texas Rangers. It was accepted for it's simple entertainment value that can get an hour to pass awful fast.
As far as entertainment value goes I give it a 10. I can watch this show and pay intense or litle attention to it any time!
(....I'd really like to see Nia Peeples get her own show now that Walker is over. It could be the hour long Nia show where she does ....well whatever!!)
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)
Pirates, action and comedy. It made for a good film.
I must start with I did expect it to be better but at the same time did not watch it with any expectations from the storyline. I was actually quite surprised by Johnny Depps performance because I sometimes feel his performances could have been better based on his previous work. Also I knew he'd be speaking with an accent which I anticipated my be very poor like the way he spoke in the 9nth Gate. It was anything but.
His character was by far the most likable. Orlando Bloom was decent but I think many not so well knowns could have given an equally good performance if not better. By the end of the movie they try to pretty up his character with his glued on facial hair and weaved in extensions hanging and styled which are so obviously fake and so obviously loaded with hair gel. Hollywoods desperate for sex cymbals I see.
Anyway the film revolves around a group of pirates that have been cursed for their greed and misdeeds by a bounty they were paid in cursed gold. Captain Jack Sparrow is out to get revenge and his ship back which the cursed pirates who committed mutiny on him now live their curse on. Will Turner(Orlando Bloom) is the son of one of these pirates that was murdered by his own shipmates and is needed to break the curse. Basically its a story of boy loves girl, girl protects boy and by doing so gets kidnapped. Everyone in the film is after the Black Pearl for one reason or another. There are some great action scenes, a good amount of humor and of course pirates. The special effects were pretty good too and added just that much more to the films plot being carried out.
No I wouldn't give it a ten but just for the opening scene where Johnny Depp arrives in the docks it gets a 7. It was a classic Hollywood moment where art, humor and reality meets up in a way we just love to see, and don't often anymore with most films. Worth watching more than once for sure.
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
The ending was a major disappointment
The Matrix Revolutions is said to be the final installment of the Matrix movies and is said to close out the series. As entertaining as it was it leaves the viewer with unanswered question as the first two did but in a whole different sense. The film certainly puts to rest the rumors that Zion city was part of the matrix. It also has a climactic ending for the future of the city and the battle between Neo and Agent Smith BUT WHAT BECOMES OF NEO??? What becomes of the Matrix world now that the people it contains will have the option to be free...what is to become of those people?
All in all it was a good movie but it leaves too many questions with infinite answers we shouldn't be stuck pondering. Quite simply the answers are boring to imagine with the gaping wound of an ending we are left to close. I myself would bet even if it's not for 5 years there just may be ONE final installment. This films plot was simple, the storyline simple and the ending was also very very simple. There was less explanation of things and the films primary action was the battle with the robots. Not a lot of hyped up Kung-Fu fights in this flick. Anyone satisfied by this movie as the final installment has low standards and wasn't expecting or asking for much at all for their dollar. That's quite sad really. Synapsis: dull storyline, great action and the thinnest plot of all three movies. I very much enjoyed it but was left feeling unsettled by the ending and yes some what disappointed.
Cabin Fever (2002)
Winner of the worst film of the year award
This movie was so awful I don't know where to start. From bad acting to a seemingly dialog-less script this film has to be one of the biggest stinkers of all time. The plot was pitiful and the outcomes for each character were just plain VERY stupid. I have watched all of Peter Jacksons horror films and the man needs to stick to elves, wizards and warriors. The kids in this film are supposed to be college kids or something I guess but thats yet another part of the story that's not quite explained. This is one of those R movies that's really geared towards the 17 and under crowd and even 17 is pushing it. How it earned a 5.7 from voter ratings I'm dumbfounded. A thin boring plot that the kiddies can grasp with a bit of nudity and gore to wow them with. This film was just pathetic!!! From the mystery disease that they all catch to the p*** poor acting by the town folk that were mirrored straight from the script of Deliverance, it's just so god awful I can not explain. How someone wrote a long detailed review of this movie praising it ...it's just pathetic to see other human beings are so shallow, dense, lack personality and insight along with a whole other slew of personality and character flaws. I'm disgusted by the reviews, the votes and most of all the film. It's an edgier immature teen/pre-teen film. Nothing more.
Here's the summary: 5 teens or...young adults, the film never really specified though they were drinking, go off to a cabin for what reasons we have no idea. Simply to drink and soak in the environment from the film Deliverance. A stranger shows up with an illness after having an encounter with the most unruly of the 5 kids. He begs for help, there is a confrontation and in turn the man is set on fire, running off into the woods where he collapses in the towns water reservoir infecting the first of the kids. Ok here we go. None of it made any sense. It all just happened to happen. It was a made up story and a very poorly one at that. Zero sense of reality here folks! This film definitely didn't have a script it was an outline at best and thrown together very poorly on set. From the reality of the disease that spread so easily to the p*** poor reaction of the kids is just ignorant. I do believe the average 21 year old would react as foolishly and childish as they do in the situations that arrive, but in the world of reality none of this could ever happen. If this film were made of toilet paper I wouldn't wipe my butt with it!!!! More so anyone who actually saw something in this film deserves the nasty rash the kids got in this poor excuse of a movie. No wonder people download movies. Why pay $14 for a ticket a soda and some popcorn and get ripped off on this piece of crap!! I'd demand my money back and in fact by law that have to refund it! If you did actually like this film I'd almost pity you but rather wish you dead so as to have one less mindless, personality-less idiot on the planet. ...Two good things about the movie I'll admit. Some of the acting from the 5 kids was good and the very best thing about this film is when the stupid thing ended!
GATTACA (1997)
Running thru my vains
This film was exceptional. The plot, storyline and character development is excellent. It's relevancy to our reality runs deep(particularly what is to become). The artistic aspect of this movie is simply brilliant. While it tells the tale of Vincents journey of deception into the genetically elite, the abstract insinuates everyone knows his ploy while also reflecting OUR genuine reality. The world has been contoured, so to speak, by the genetically purified and elite. This group of so called, superior bred humans, are actually cursed by knowing their exact limitations which is the movies abstract underlying tone. Vincent shows us that though knowing for certain you are above the normal expectations of the normal, having no true measure of limitations is what truly makes you superior. Instead of going into detail about this movies plot and storyline, I choose to get to the core of the story. Everyone knows/suspects what Vincent is doing and are not only amazed, impressed and secretly envious of, they have a deep respect for him which is unsaid. Knowing you will reach certain limitations in everything you do would likely be quite unsettling and have an emotional consequence most of us would never want to know. This is unsaid through the film but if you are sharp you catch on to it. On top of this there are scenes that just shove this in your face. When percentages say you WILL live this long, meet these projected abilities (exc), the same measuring system saying you MAY, leaves for an untold future. Uncertainty of the future leaves the recipients of this information with the power to overcome what may be. You make yourself in the word of Gattaca, as long as you are not the foretold and so called elite. This film is worth owning for countless reasons. Rarely do I find a film worthy of comparison to music such as (god forbid) Stairway to Heaven or Hotel California. I will watch this movie from time to time for the rest of my life. It's ashame it didn't receive countless awards or even better yet a sequel. SEE THIS FILM!!!!!!!!
The Crow: Stairway to Heaven (1998)
Once you get passed the differences of what you know, it's a really great show
The show is basically a different take on the first Crow movie. The storyline varies to different degrees at times but they same characters and essential storyline including the murders of Draven and his girlfriend are the same. Draven wakes up to the reality his girlfriend is dead and as far as the world is concerned so is he. He has been sent back to take vengeance on those that murdered them, but in this version there is a twist. When vengeance is taken on those that took away his life and girlfriend shellys, there is a consequence that he must face and it is brought to him by those he has punished. The twist in plot took some getting used to but it still ran well with the first movies. Draven finds himself sent back here to set things right for others and more so to stop them from going wrong, usually being introduced to their stories when the characters are halfway there already. Draven does get SOME vengeance but in turn learns that no matter what he does he can not change what happened and retribution against those that so wronged him will be payed in the next life. One reviewer says this show isn't worth watching for "The Serious fan of The Crow" because of the differences from the movie, but evidently this person isn't one of them. In the original storyline in the 1st comic and book Draven and his girlfriend are murdered by a pack of Satanic bikers along side a desolate country road after they break down and are in turn stranded. The new installment of The Crow movies is based on this story from what I have read about it and hopefully won't be as disappointing as the 2nd movie and well as far as the 3rd goes it's not even worth mentioning!! If your a true fan of The Crow this series is well worth watching. Not every episode was great but plenty were and all were at the least good. Plenty of guest stars and some really great bands are in the show and soundtrack. Just forgive Mark Dacascos' scenes when he is on stage playing and singing. They wanted to stay true to the character so it was worked into the show but it was obvious to myself, a musician and anyone really, he was given a crash course in guitar and even less in singing. The show aired at around midnight or so, I don't specifically remember and was canceled all too abruptly. I know Dacascos wasn't real big on doing a TV series and would bet he was the main reason it was canceled. When he asked to close the series with a made for TV movie he was refused and we were left hanging. Way to go you Hollywood jerkoffs! The money's more important than the art! Anyway, it's definitely worth watching if you have the opportunity. Worth adding to the movie collection for that matter.
The Rundown (2003)
Decent but we expected more
After all the hype and well edited trailers for this film I was expecting a really great movie. This it wasn't. The previews made it look great on top of the critics reviews but lets face it these guys are owned by the film industry and say what they are told to. The action scenes were good to decent. At some point after a series of well executed fighting manouvers, suddenly we would be hit with some combat moves that looked simply terrible. It was like suddenly out of no where the choreographer suffered a fit of A.D.D.! The beginning fight scene and fight in the jungle are by far the best hand to hand combat action scenes of the movie. In other parts of the film they were decent but there was some stuff just too elaborite with flashes of very poor choreographed blows. The humor was also decent but sometimes went weak at crucial points of the character interaction when it really should have delivered stronger laughs. I think this film had a lot going for it in the planning stages but much was lost when it came to the actual shooting. Walken played the bad guy the best he could with how the character was written and the lines he was given. The Rock truly delivered a likable hero performance and his acting was a bit better than what I was expecting. Something tells me a lot of the films dialog was done improvised because it simply hadn't yet been written! Probably taking a lot of pressure off Dwayne by doing so and hoping for more naturally delivered lines. Sometimes it seemed to work and well... I am disapointed but was still entertained. I wouldn't count The Rock out from doing action movies but to last in these roles he's going to have to do much better in his next film. Scott was stuck in the same type of role we often see him in. A smart mouthed s*** talker that has a comment for everything! I wish I could elaborate on this film more but theres really not much to tell. Some good fight scenes, some bad at points during, a solid amount of action with flashy gunplay at the end but the film just seemed to get too thin at times. Definitely one for the kiddies and teenagers. I give it a 4 out of 10...maybe a second screening would help but I can wait till it's on TV or someone rents it for that. Oh and I certainly wouldn't put it the category of VanDamme films or Schwarzeneggers older films. It doesn't deserve that big an insult!
Get Shorty (1995)
WHAT A PIECE OF POOP!!!!
This movie is simply TERRIBLE!!! It's another one of those movies people rave about because it got a ton of hype being it was Travoltas next big project after the success of Pulp Fiction. Travolta in fact didn't even want to do this picture! From its poor story line to its really bad scenes I couldn't hate this movie more!!! The worst part of this movie is...well all of it!! But anyway the worst scene of the movie is when another mobster shows up to kill Travoltas character and is shouting and announcing himself before getting to the room Travolta is in. Travolta then shoots a shot that basically no man on earth could achieve!!!! Grazing the guys head leaving a bald stripe down the center of his hair!!! This movie was so far from reality in every sense!!! ONLY A GULLABLE CHILD WOULD BUY INTO IT!! But then again that's exactly who Hollywood has spent the last ten years specifically catering to and targeting. Naive children with no sense of reality!!! Even Sonnenfeld greatly regretted making this movie before it was even finished. This movie actually had a point which it in fact completely seemed to miss with its poor humor and overdone scenes. I guess there's enough sheep in this world to convince this movie was quality entertainment whith a solid story line when in fact it has niether! It's like Meryl Streep. If everyone is saying something particularly popular and powerful people, the group of mindless people who can't think for themselves, others will agree and run with what they are told to not be outcast and simply suck up and fit in. Finding others with no real sense of who they are or what they like so to fit in they go with the majority of mindless nonpersonality drones that are following someone else without a clue. I'll give it to Travolta because the only thing this movie had going for it was him and his performance which in fact is very good. I give this film the STINKER of the decade award for movies that were supposed to be a top box office release. PEE UUUU!!!
Lone Hero (2002)
Solid, original story with plenty of guns and action while still having depth and a plot
I couldn't say I like this movie more. I gave it a 10! The characters are very like-able and the story is really good yet simple. Bart(Lou Diamond Phillips) is head of a lawless biker gang that has a strong dislike for cops as you'll see in the beginning. While Bart and one of his biker brothers are on an excursion of violence and mayhem, they encounter John(Sean Patric Flanery), a simple guy from a very small town that works in a wild west show locally. After Bart and Dog, his biker gang companion, rob and beat down smoky their local bartender,Bart makes it clear what will happen to anyone who is witness from his biker brothers. John is the only witness with enough guts to tell the police what he saw and who they were. From here on the story really gets moving. The following day Bart and Dog show up in the mock wild west town John and his fellow bar companions work at. John without really thinking gets the drop on them with his stage gun, a real gun but loaded with blanks. Once in jail Bart uses his one phone call to call some more of his biker brothers who dispatch the sherif and his deputy, setting Bart free. From here on it's John versus the bikers with some help from another West show worker Gus(Robert Forster).
Flanery's is very like-able as the character John. John's not too sure of himself in the beginning and just in general but finds his inner courage when he is confronted with the harsh realities that a small town such as his never see. Phillips I think has made a great accomplishment with his portrayal of Bart. Evil to the bone but somehow you still like him. Bart feels a connection with John as if John is his soul opposite or something along that line. John couldn't do more to show Bart he is connected to him in no way and is determined to make sure Bart doesn't find an untimely death and serves out his life in prison. Forster as Gus is somewhat of a rougher good guy and is very cool. An excellent supporting role to Flanery and the theme of the movie. This movie is simply too good to be a B movie. I would have payed to see it and infact bought the DVD.
This film shows a solid script with some imagination can produce a very good movie on a low budget. I wish more movie exec's would catch on to this and stop showing the brainless, tasteless garbage in the theatre's that caters to mindless teenagers and young adults that simply have no taste or understanding about what makes a film good. Maybe a little more budget and this film would have made the theatres. You'd be amazed what you can learn about film making from lower brow movies such as Lone Hero. My final statement is this: Story and acting REALLY CAN carry a movie without being all flashy and in a pretty package to get your attention and dollars. This movie is really worth seeing and when you do you may find yourself watching it repeatedly as myself and many others have.