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Reviews
Poolhall Junkies (2002)
Ultimately one of the worst films I've ever seen.
Seriously. This entire film was a bunch of incredibly contrived garbage. Alison Eastwood acts like a piece of wood. The writer/director/star of this movie couldn't act or write or direct.
Case in point, this ridiculous mini-scene at an RV lot: "I'll bet you (something ridiculous) I can tell you where you got your shoes." "Yeah, where?" "You got your left shoe on your left foot and your right shoe on your right foot." (Cut to next scene, with the con accomplished.) What a load of crap! Anyone who has ever been to New Orleans knows that old line.
I believe that this is a bold cinematic misadventure. This film is terrible on every level. I would encourage the filmmaker to cut his losses and go back to barber college or clown school or anything that requires him NOT to be in front of or behind the camera.
Nothing But Trouble (1991)
Quite possibly the worst movie ever!
I cannot even begin to tell you how much I hated this movie. I still have nightmares.
Hold on... that's misleading. I don't have nightmares resulting from anything happening in the film itself, but from actually being in the room as this film was playing on TV.
There has never been a poorer actor than Chevy Chase. Sure he did well in Fletch and Vacation, but seriously, when you see that Chevy Chase is in a movie, doesn't it just make you want to move to Lancaster and become Amish? Secondly, the entire film takes place in some sort of dump and Dan Ackroyd, the king of all schlock, plays some sort of centenarian judge with no teeth. It kinda reminded me of Strom Thurmond, but uglier and less funny.
That should be noted... this thing is purportedly a comedy. I did not laugh once throughout the entire running time of this film. I was consistently grossed out, and I believe this was unintentional on the part of the filmmakers. This film was just so terrible, thinking about it makes me nauseous. If you want to lose weight, just watch this film and you'll lose your appetite forever.
Let me just say this: I have never walked out of a theater due to the crappiness of a movie, but when I watched this film on my television, I walked out of my apartment.