jllagunos Reviews

Kaleidoscope (2023)

What a let down

[4/10 · 10 October 2023]

Three attempt was very good and interesting. The idea of a series that you can watch in any order was a bold move. But I think the writers / producers got trapped in the same kind of cage as the GoT ones.

The character's arcs are very compelling, regarding all episodes except for the heist itself (episode white). You can understand almost every character motivation (save perhaps the chemist) and you start caring for all of them. Even the worst ones.

I even graded as "I like it" in Netflix by the pink chapter. The story has been straightforward and passionate and I was thrilled to watch the final episode. The heist itself. Episode White.

Do not watch that garbage. Is really infuriating. Just imagine whatever finale you can come up with. It will be far better, I can assure you. The producers / writers wanted to "surprise" the audience by subverting expectations, just as the GoT crew did it. And boy they let the ball fell. Characters you love because of their witt and preparation are dispatched in such a stupid way, they just lose any credibility. The "twist" is both eyes- rolling worthy, as it is stupid. All the relatable characters are either killed or destroyed. The interesting ones are forgotten. The troubled but lovable ones, become the most hated ones. And the "resolution" is just plain stupid.

Do yourself a favor and skip the White episode. You will appreciate the series better that way.

The Last Man on Earth (2015–2018)

Funny, but not really about the end of the world

[5/10 · 13 March 2023]

The show do have some hilarious situations, the acting is solid, the cast is ok, but it took me the first three episodes to understand, this is NOT about an apocalyptic situation turned hilarious. Is just a show about loneliness, and the complexity of human relationships. They could have set the show in nowadays LA, with a bunch of suddenly rich nerds meeting with some other cooler people, and all the jokes would sustain. So it's not bad, bad, but is also not as good as you could expect. Unless you just want a cheesy comedy, easy as a background noise while you are doing something else. The main characters are not that relatable. You may identify with some of each one's traits but that's it. And the whole "end of the world" situation seems to be the justification for their bad behavior, poor choices, etc. Somehow it just allows the show to portrait weird scenarios as plausible. But that's it.

Keep Breathing (2022)

Unrelatable and hilarious

[1/10 · 6 August 2022]

An insufferable lawyer, always being annoying and harsh to anyone around her, is abruptly alone to survive in the wilderness (because people supposedly to be experts in that matter suddenly decided to act as scared little toddlers). But that is just a pretext to show us in flashbacks just how unsympathetic and unrelatable she has been in her life because child-parent mild trauma. The actress did a good job. The problem was a script that gives the lawyer a plot armor against everything but that just makes the character unrelatable and the challenges hilarious. The funny thing is the positive "reviews" that try to discredit the negative ones by assuming the problem was the lack of adventure and survival elements when the show fails miserably to provide us a sympathetic character or a compelling redemption arc. Do not waste your time.

The Gray Man (2022)

Fun, fast paced, exciting

[10/10 · 27 July 2022]

God I missed a good movie like this! Action packed, with great performances, a good dose of comedy, and well written strong female characters. The Gray man is a good movie regardless of what some critics and some boring people may say.

I saw some comments on media and thought it would be far worse of what I found. It is really funny, exciting, has a linear story, action packed, with excellent performances and compelling characters. I loved the hero, the villain, Ana de Armas Is just GREAT (she deserves her own action movie flick), the recruiter, the niece.

It is a love letter to the original Bond films and Mission Impossible series. Do no let some people discourage to watch and enjoy this movie. Is great!

Yakuza Princess (2021)

Give it a chance

[8/10 · 11 July 2022]

I watched and found it funny, interesting, with some great visuals and compelling acting. Came down here and found so many awful reviews I even thought I've watched a different one.

So, I'll just say, is no "The Godfather", but definitively is not a bad movie. Good for a lazy afternoon, enjoyable and can even set up a new series.

Last Night in Soho (2021)

Such a promising idea, wasted

[5/10 · 3 July 2022]

The trailer look good. The general idea sounded nice. But the execution... Oh my... The script is so bad that makes us despise the protagonist since the very beginning. All characters are like cartoons. The whole movie gives that feeling of a parody, where every situation and character are just exaggerated in what try to beat dramatic way, but failed miserably. As is the director haven't shake Scott Pilgrim's from him.

Kimi (2022)

Nice idea, badly executed

[4/10 · 15 June 2022]

The idea is interesting. The dialogue and the construction of the main character, poor. Angela Child (Kravitz) is the most annoying, insufferable entitled person, who uses her traumas to treat everybody like trash. The bad guy was revealed to early and the evidence was so thin, I hoped for a twisted ending, but no. Cliché.

Clarice (2021)

Do not waste your time

[3/10 · 4 June 2022]

I did have it several episodes to catch me. Since the first one I felt it disjointed, the bad writing, the poor portrayed characters and the bad acting. But I tried... Till they managed to transform very interesting premise into just another show to push agendas. (* insert meme of Brando as the Godfather saying "Look how they massacred my boy" *)

Zero Dark Thirty (2012)

Not passing the test of time

[5/10 · 29 May 2022]

I watched on its release, 10 years ago. I thought it was good back then. A little ill paced, with grey characters, but I assumed it was because of the docu style. I just watched again and boy it was bad... Bad script, bad direction and bad acting, make Maya unrelatable and annoying. The rest of the great cast members, are just shadows before getting to the actual raid... Terrible movie.

How to Survive Being Single: The last show (2022) Season 2, Episode 8

Never ride a bike

[4/10 · 13 May 2022]

Twice in this show, riding a bike proves bad business. The series have it's moments. But in this season's finale they managed to make you hate the protagonist's love interest, in one of the most obnoxious "here me out" moments in sitcoms history...

Gunpowder Milkshake (2021)

Fun, but silly

[5/10 · 16 April 2022]

Great visuals. Good acting. Nice fighting choreographies, (though stealed from great action movies). Some unfortunate dialogue. And, again, so badly written, so stupidly trying to rip of John Wick, but in a cheesy way. It could have great. But no. Just silly. Fun, but silly.

Inventing Anna (2022)

I really enjoyed it

[9/10 · 13 February 2022]

I binge-watched in a couple of days. I was aware of the original story and didn't expect anything. I found the show interesting, fun, will paced and I liked a lot. The characters really spoke to me. The pack of old writers were delightful. So I came to share my point of view and was shocked by the reviews here. I read a lot of them. Some were just unintelligible to me. I didn't find any of the things some other criticized so harshly. I may be wrong but send to me some of this reviews were a little biased. Anyway, I loved it. I found the acting compelling, the story well written and the pace perfect. I loved the music, the cinematography and even the little details, as how the story ties with all of this other scammers, like the Fyre festival guys, the Shkreli guy, and even Elizabeth Holmes. Looking at all this it is hard not to feel worried for Americans right now...

Reacher: Reacher Said Nothing (2022) Season 1, Episode 7

Finally, some action, but meh

[2/10 · 8 February 2022]

The episode flows ok. Finally we get to see some payback, but the confrontation with the death squad was dull. Specially the last one, against the cousin. Are we supposed to believe that small guy can be a challenge against Reacher? Some naive screenwriter, or old school executive decided that was an exciting way to end the fight. It is not. You set up a great hero, you don't put it in danger against a small, hot blooded kid. That's just a rolling eyes moment.

All of Us Are Dead (2022– )

Cheese and forgettable

[2/10 · 6 February 2022]

There is no coherence whatsoever: zombie turning may go from seconds to several minutes depending on the character. The amount of stupid decisions and unrelatable characters get me siding with the zombies by the 2nd episode. Save yourself from this.

Blade Runner: Black Lotus (2021–2022)

Nice idea, poor execution

[1/10 · 1 February 2022]

Why does they keep handing this series to incapable writers?

A nice idea, to connect both movies, but with a script so bad, I fell sleep at least in three episodes. There is no consistency whatsoever in characters, abilities, etc. A third of the episodes are just fillers. It seemed to have been written by a 7 year old, for his classmates. Very disappointing.

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

Unnecessary, disrespectful, and avoidable

[1/10 · 19 January 2022]

The actresses and actors are the only thing that are good about the movie. They did an excellent job with a garbage script. The visuals are somehow "less perfect" than the original trilogy ones. The music is definitively not on point. A shame, because it was some of the elements that allow us the immersive experience of the original movie.

But the script... oh my, oh my. The script is an abomination: filled with ill-inspired humor, making fun of its own concept and universe, portraits a disoriented hero, as confused as the audience, going along a story you cannot care less about. You can almost feel the total disregard for the fandom, the franchise, the series and its original material.

Its disheartening to watch Hollywood destroying its movie franchises this way. This is another "lastjedization" of a saga, and a shame in that regard.

Do not waste your money or your time in this. Better watch again the original and forget this monster exists.

Eternals (2021)

Speechless... As in "bad"...

[3/10 · 16 January 2022]

Basic dates that do not add up, poor research over mythology from different cultures... But the worst part is the script, again. No substance, no empathy for any of the characters, whom, by the way, betray and forgive each other every 20 minutes or so. Really, really a poor film...

Station Eleven: Wheel of Fire (2021) Season 1, Episode 1

Dialogue. Dialogue, please

[6/10 · 15 January 2022]

The story is interesting. The cinematography, delightful. Even the music is great. But the dialogue was written by a sleepy, detached person. The first scene alone was as beautiful in it's imagery as it was awful in the script...

SAS: Red Notice (2021)

Written and directed by 12 year olds

[3/10 · 5 October 2021]

It's a shame having such a big budget, great actors and actresses, even interesting plot points, and let all go to waste with an incompetent script and even worst direction. You may use this movie as background noise. Nothing more.

Jolt (2021)

Fun, agile, exciting

[9/10 · 29 July 2021]

Finally, a good movie with strong female characters that do not try to preach on female superiority or whatever (I'm looking you, Marvel). Things are well explained, Lindy is funny, crack jokes, and is a relatable hero. The cast is excellent, the story flows and you really can enjoy it..

The Outcasts (2017)

Avoid this and just watch Mean Girls

[1/10 · 28 June 2021]

Just for a brief moment I thought this movie would be something fun, clever, with well developed characters, an interesting conflict, and perhaps even a smart satire about teen angst, school and society... You guess it, I hoped for "Mean Girls". But no. It is just plain dumb, stereotypical, full with clichés, prejudices, tasteless jokes, under developed characters.... It's a shame because of the very good actresses they got. But bad scripts, bad filming and a very pool conception of life, can't save anything. Avoid it at all costs. Really, just watch Mean Girls again.

(they even dared to call out Tina Fey during the movie... not cool guys. Not cool).

Together Together (2021)

Heartwarming, funny, deep.

[9/10 · 19 June 2021]

So is not a romantic comedy. But it dwells deep into what love is. About friendship, about woman-man relationships, about what it means to be a parent, a partner and also to let go. And it has a lot of laughs. Definitively a most watch.

World War Z (2013)

It has aged like a good wine

[9/10 · 2 June 2021]

At first I rated 7, but now, after watching the last Netflix entrances about zombies, this one starts to look like Citizen Kane of zombie lore. Great action, people and warriors who are actually intelligent. A really good Zombie movie.

Black Summer: Diner (2019) Season 1, Episode 5

FCS

[3/10 · 2 June 2021]

So, you get stocked with the guys that made you crash. And some of them has the nerve to tell you that "what's done, is done". It's like being trapped with a guy who actually enjoyed TLJ. The only humane decision is to put all of them out of their misery... (And the writers too)

Black Summer: Alone (2019) Season 1, Episode 4

The quality keeps going down

[1/10 · 2 June 2021]

This episode could have been really good. But it wasn't. By far. A character who already had proven to be an incompetent idiot is the one who gets to be alone. And such a waste of time and possibilities... Had to skip it also...