offshade Reviews

Knives Out (2019)

Terrible writing, not a whodonit

[3/10 · 7 January 2023]

Presenting this film as a whodonit and - even worse - putting it in the same sentence as Agatha Christie, is simply misleading. The film shows you who did it after 30 minutes, no matter if this is misleading and is reversed at the very end. The matter of fact is that you as a viewer, don't have any questions regarding the murder.

The only supposedly agonising thing is whether the detective is going to discover that Marta did it, and that requires for the audience to actually not want that to happen. As a viewer you can't possibly side with her though, since she has made a terrible mistake that led to a man's death, no matter whether she intended to or not. Would you forgive your mother's nurse if she made a mistake like that? I guess not.

Furthermore, the old man's children are underachievers, but not terrible people for him to leave all his money to his nurse just because she is a nice person. They are not keeping him tied up in a basement, they even visit him on his birthday. They are his children for God's sake.

Goodnight Mommy (2022)

Dumbed down American version

[4/10 · 16 September 2022]

A shockingly dumbed down version for American audiences of an outstanding Austrian thriller, that lacks the impact, the brutality, the shock factor and the intelligence of its original. Instead you get the cinematic clichés, the sentimental overtones, the cheap musical dress-up and the spoon fed explanatory breakdown of a Hollywood style second class thriller. Watts is getting dangerously close to being typecast as the go-to actress for remakes, which can't be good for her legacy. The performances are fine overall nevertheless, are not sufficient however to even soften the crush that is the comparison between the two films. If you haven't seen any of them, do yourself a favour and watch the original without getting spoiled by this mediocre attempt of a crowd-pleaser.

Extraordinary Stories (2008)

An experiment

[5/10 · 1 August 2021]

240 minutes of voice-over narration with visual aids of multiple stories that do not intertwine, don't compel and are not extraordinary either. It might be an experiment in storytelling, it doesn't make it good cinema though.

A Quiet Place Part II (2020)

Too many weaknesses

[5/10 · 9 July 2021]

There was not a single person in the whole writing/production/acting team to say, "wait a minute, you know that a vinyl record can't play in a loop on its own, right?" And there you have it. This is the level of stupidity and Illogical decisions you have to simply ignore to enjoy the good aspects of the film - some moments of tension and a few very well made action sequences. However, the editing is poor (cutting back and forth to different storylines way too often and too harshly) and there is way too much music (especially compared to the first film, making it a much less quiet film), resulting in softening the tension. Definitely a step down from its predecessor and somewhat disappointing.

Bodyguard (2018)

Two thumbs down

[2/10 · 5 October 2018]

First episode was half decent due to its tense intro, second was simply painful to watch. Laughable storyline and horrendous acting. Pass.

Toni Erdmann (2016)

Referencing Von Trier is a joke

[4/10 · 30 December 2016]

I feel amazed (and sorry) for the critics and their praises. How narrow a filmviewing horizon they must possess. The premise of the film has been dealt with many times before with flair and originality and this is not one of those instances. Referencing Von Trier for validation, offers more comedic value than the film itself can muster - after all it is being presented as a comedy. You will read about character development and cinematography and narration in excess. The truth is there hardly no character development in sight (emotional outbursts don't count as such, merely as a character snapshot if you will), below par cinematography (following protagonists with a handy is not the archetype of masterful camera-work or framesetting), a narrative that is neither resourceful nor original, which coupled with an entire editing room on strike results in a near 3 hour experience at which any German would exclaim "da ham wir den Salat". The acting is good and therefore I'm not slamming it completely to the ground, but if you want to see something European towards that direction try Cantet's 'L' emploi du temps' instead.