Landofree Reviews

The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978 TV Movie)

More memorable than the Sequel Trilogy

[5 February 2021]

The much maligned Star Wars Holiday Special is memorable for the many creative chances it took, while still maintaining the action, excitement, and characters of the beloved Star Wars film that was released a little over a year before.

We get to see our heroes again, and villains (Vader), and we get to see an inclusive look at our favorite Wookiee's family. It's really unfair and demonstrates Kathleen Kennedy's implicit bias that she chose to stay away from representing the Wookiee's in her new trilogy. Yeah, she gave us Chewbacca, and a couple of others, but she refuses to show them as anything other than prisoners, slaves (Solo), and as the new Han Solo's indentured servant.

Ford era Chewbacca was more dynamic, and the old Han was more inclusive and woke, and even celebrated Chewbacca's religion by attending Life Day with him and his family.

Lucas chose to return to Kashyyyk in his prequel trilogy that gave us new incite into the life and culture of the Wookiee's. Kennedy's portrayal of people of fur, was to rely on species stereotypes and continue to promote her specieist ideology.

Hopefully with Filoni and Favreau in control, they will finally show, and give equal representation, to Chewbacca and the Wookiee race. It is my hope that they show the people of fur in more everyday situations like people of privilege such as Kennedy. Why can't a Wookiee run a large entertainment corporation in the Star Wars galaxy? Are people of fur not equal in her Sith eyes?

It's time to reunite Chewbacca with his loving partner, their child, and the rest of his family. I call on Filoni and Favreau to continue Lucas' message of inclusivity, equity, and representation of all, but especially of people of fur.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 16: The Rescue (2020) Season 2, Episode 8

Predictable, but satsifactory.

[18 December 2020]

Not the best Episode. Where did Fett go? Why didn't he come back? More mowing down Stormtroopers like confetti. Luke's appearance was cool, but that wasn't his voice. My guess is that it was Sebastian Stan's voice, just so when it's not Mark Hamill next time, at least the voice will be the same as in this Episode.

The Girl Power things is a little ludicrous, especially the fight with Boba Fett...totally not realistic even in a fantasy space way. Oh, well.

Nice to see R2 and Luke, and Luke's X-Wing. You can be sure that we will be seeing the rest of the team in next season (i.e. Han, Leia, Lando, C-3PO, etc.) I'm sure we'll be running into one of Hutt's descendants.

Now that Mando delivered Baby Toy Sales, what's next for him. They should have delivered the kid last season, but they needed to drag it out. I don't get the emotional connection between he and the kid, it's forced and not organic. We didn't learn enough about Mando to know why this gremlin would mean anything to him and bring a tear to his eye. I didn't feel it as a viewer and wasn't buying it.

Well, the Empire is a total joke, and that makes for boring action scenes. Gone are the days when Lucasfilm actually made Stormtroopers a formidable foe, as in A New Hope, Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, and Rogue One. Disney can't have any real scary foe. I'd be afraid to suggest a drinking game everytime a Stormtrooper goes down, because someone might get very sick.

Anyway, this is not a "10", but almost an "8". Oh yeah, it was nice to see Luke do something different with the force, and by that I mean, when he crushed that Dark Trooper like an aluminum can...speaking of which, I don't care how much armor you have, when you get hit in the head like Mando did, your brain is still going to suffer some serious concussions.

That's all!

The Mandalorian: Chapter 15: The Believer (2020) Season 2, Episode 7

Fill out TPS Reports...classic reference!

[11 December 2020]

Why did Mandalorian have to wait until the last two episodes to make a decent episode? Well, I'm glad they finally put forth the effort.

This was a decent episode. I wish Boba had more to do, but it was great to see his armor painted again.

If you look at the concept art at the end of this episode it looks as though Mando was supposed to have taken Boba's jet pack, because you can see it on his back as he's hanging off the transport vehicle.

It was nice to see the Imperials finally destroy some people instead of simply being the targets for Mando et al. When the Stormtroopers took out those bandits, and then the Tie Fighters came in, I stood up and cheered. Those are how good the Imperials should be, not just mindless targets.

The writing wasn't 100%, but it was a lot better. There are some weak moments, and lapses in story logic, but it was still way better than it has been for the first 6-ish episodes.

The TPS Reports reference to Office Space was unexpected, but awesome! I'm glad they referenced that generation, because we are the original fans.

That's it for now.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 13: The Jedi (2020) Season 2, Episode 5

Slow does not mean compelling. It just means slow.

[27 November 2020]

Mando is given a task to find a Jedi. He say's it's a difficult proposition and that his price his high. He walks out the gate, see's the giant geckos, and finds the silly looking jedi in about 30 seconds. Yikes. More terrible writing and directing....and acting.

Rosario Dawson is overrated. Can't act. Frank Oz was more compelling with his hand stuffed up Yoda's backside, than Dawson in a silly foam zebra head dress.

The music for The Mandalorian is dull. The only compelling piece is the theme song, and the musical callbacks to the original series. Other than that, it's forgettable, and uninspired.

More dumb villains that are taken down as easily as sprinkling salt on French Fries. No formidable villain = boring waste of time.

Oh yeah, pocket-pouch Yoda/Gumbo will be this Holiday season's biggest toy sales boon!

The Mandalorian: Chapter 12: The Siege (2020) Season 2, Episode 4

SO WEAK! SO BAD! BEST WORST STAR WARS SINCE RISE OF SKYPATINE

[20 November 2020]

Another weak episode. Bad Writing. Bad Acting. Bad Direction. Nothing can save this sinking Star Destroyer. It's going straight down the garbage chute. Get some real directors and writers on-board this train-wreck fast. Do not let anymore inexperienced directors helm anymore episodes, or you will lose the remaining Star Wars Fans, except the ones that don't know their their Bantha Poodoo from their Blue Milk.

There was no excitement, nor tension in this episode. You can safely bet that anytime you see any version of a any Stormtrooper, that they are going to be killed swiftly, easily, and without obstacles. What a boring joke this is turning out to be.

Baby Yoda vomits from eating blue cookies...give me a break. This is typical Disney Humor. I'm waiting for Mando to change Baby Toy Sales diaper in the next one. Then he can say, "and I thought they smelled bad on the outside."

Do yourself a favor and stop watching this, because all it is, is one or two callbacks per episode, and that's it. The rest is predicable, and horribly acted, directed, and written.

Anyone who thinks these episodes are better than a 5 rating, are sucking the same Kennedy teet that Luke did in the Last of the Jedi, and are intoxicated with their own delusions.

Star Wars Live Action is garbage in the Kennedy Era, and looks like it will continue to be for the foreseeable future.

I have to believe the 10 Star Ratings I'm seeing are meant to be ironic, a joke, and just trolls annoying everyone. No way they can be real. Way to stuff the ballot Disney. Talk about voter fraud, you see it first hand here folks, with Disney paid upvotes.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 11: The Heiress (2020) Season 2, Episode 3

WASH, RINSE AND REPEAT....

[13 November 2020]

Well, everyone had hoped for a better episode than the last one, and this is clearly only mildly better. Favreau has proven that he is not a strong writer, and Bryce Dallas Howard refuses to get anymore drama out of the episodes she directs. Short episodes are a cheat, and this formula of "land in new place, get into trouble, get out of trouble, move on." is starting to get very boring and tiresome. They need to bring in Vince Giligan from Breaking Bad to give this story an interesting and solid arc. Call backs are not enough to keep this barge floating. These stories seem to follow none of the story rules they set up.

When Mando was trying to save the Imperial barge from crashing because of the steep dive, why didn't the tower control start barking orders at him like they did in the earlier part of the episode when he was crash landing. Why do they also insist on making the Stormtrooper terrible shots, it makes the Imperials a total joke, and not the strong antagonists they were in the original trilogy. They are using too much of the model for the "imperials" from the new sequel trilogy, where the who lot of tthem were a joke, which only means that Moff Gideon is going to lose and get the Dark Saber taken away from him with no problem.

The reason that they make short episodes is because they have no real story to tell, with no point to make. If they want to add some drama to the next episode(s), then have Baby Yoda get kidnapped for at least two episodes. I don't know who they would have kidnapped him to give it enough drama and tension, because everyone that Mando runs into, he wins, which is a recipe for boring. At this point, it would need to be someone as imposing as a Darth Vader, or Emperor, but they are dead, so unless they create a villain whom the audience can respect, as well as Mando, then we know exactly how the rest of the show The Mandalorian will go: Land in new place, get into trouble, get out of trouble, move on, rinse, and repeat. The end.

Lights in the Sky (2020)

Unwatchable drivel.

[8 November 2020]

Zooming in on low-quality footage with "professional editing software, of something that was a speck in said low-quality footage, then changing the contrast and concluding that said object is "pure energy", is ludicrous. It's possible that if you are young, dumb, and high, you will believe this codswallop.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 10: The Passenger (2020) Season 2, Episode 2

Don't believe the upvotes/high ratings.

[6 November 2020]

A promising series devolves into eye candy leaving the viewers wanting more substance.

The Mando is racing back from not seeing Boba Fest, gets tripped up by some road warriors and loses nothing. Boring. Nothing new. Nothing Learned. Story not moved forward.

The Mando is then manipulated into picking up a passenger whose species depends on him delivering said passenger to their kind for sruvival. Isn't this already the main storyline we're following for the series? Why do we need the same story to be told to us twice? In the mean time the main story-line character, baby merchandise yoda toy sales, is eating the eggs of the last of the new reptilian passenger's kind. huh? The little stuff christmas ornament is always hungry, but Mando seems to neglect this, and barely ever feeds him.

They crash escaping from the Rebels. Get harassed by space spiders, in which baby stuffed toys does not help...again. What's the logic behind when baby Gizmo gremlin decides to help, or not? Very inconsistent.

Rebels help Mando out in a cheap and weak plot way. "Hey, you're wanted, but you helped one of our kind. We'll let you go." What a weak scene.

How could they have fixed this episode?

One: Well, Boba Fest could have saved him in the beginning of this episode and we could have learned why Boba Fett gave up his armor. They could have gotten in to some big battle with a clan of Road Warriors who had taken Boba's armor from Mando, and we could see in this battle how much of a bada## Boba still is. Then Mando could have asked Boba to join him because, "you'd be handy in a fight." But Boba declines and continues being a recluse on Tatooine, or else, he could say he's looking for a guy named "Han Solo" because "I owe him one."

Or, second: When Boba crashes on "not-Hoth", he could have been attacked by a pack of Wampa's, and Luke Skywalker could have saved them, taught "Big Christmas Toy Sales Yoda" a few force tricks, and told Mando where he could take the little stuff animal. Luke could then offer to take the little guy, but is called back to Yavin by Leia because they are being attacked by a surviving fleet of Imperial Star Destroyers. Anything is better than what they did.

Anyway, Star Wars fans are being cheated with weak non-stories wrapped up in a slick looking coating.

Please try harder, it's really not hard. You are half-way their with the ton, era, and callbacks, you just need better stories, no, wait, you just need stories, because right now, all you have is half-baked ideas.

Do better Favreau, do better.

The Mandalorian: Chapter 8: Redemption (2019) Season 1, Episode 8

Mediocre Cliff-hanger at best

[27 December 2019]

8 Episodes that lead to nothing. While the tone, style, era, and visuals are leaning in the right direction, the story-telling is very weak. There is more story and drama in the Bill Hader series "Barry", compared to this.

This show reminds me of the tv show "Lost" in the worst ways. Everything is a cliff-hanger, and leads to more cliff-hanging, that leads to nothing.

They should have delivered baby Yoda to where it belongs by the end of this season. Conclude that story, and move on to something else. Now we have to wait who-knows-how-long, until they pick up next season and cliff-hang us more, so they can sell baby Yoda toys.

From many of the 8,9, and 10 star reviews I see, it shows me that fans of the Star Wars brand have come to accept mediocre story-telling as top shelf stuff, and that is sad, both for the fans, and the brand. We should expect better from this brand, and they should too.

The stakes are too low in this show, so it's hard to engage in it. The Stormtroopers are treated as jokes, and that gets old...is old. The problem with Star Wars is that the good guys always win, and, so, the Mandalorian will always win. This is a recipe for boring, uncompelling drivel. I'm afraid to see what they do to Kenobi.

Favreau is not the savior of this brand, neither is/was Kasdan...let alone Kathleen Kennedy. As much as they may push "inclusion" and "diversity" in their directing and creative choices, and such, they forget that strong, compelling, story writing should be the priority, and is a must.

If any of these 8, 9 10 star reviewers of new Star Wars movies and shows tell you to forget criticism of it, because they are the only true fans, you can rest assured, that they may know enough to believe they are right with their review, but don't know enough to know they are wrong, because the people that know, know this new stuff is mediocre.

Rambo: Last Blood (2019)

Remember: DON'T F... WITH RAMBO!

[21 September 2019]

When Rambo got in his first conflict in this film it startled me. It reminded me that this guy can be a cold-blooded killer and doesn't have time to take prisoners. They didn't know who they were messing with when they drew first blood. They got what they deserved in a way they could never imagine.

Rambo seemed to have become even more cynical in this film. I guess because he's old, he just doesn't have time to mince words. You're bad = you're dead. He's seen enough life that he knows people never change, including him.

I did find some of the production value to be cheap, like the driving down the highway scenes inside the car. Don't know why they couldn't of used a Process Trailer, instead of green-screen, cause those moments took me right out of the movie.

When the child-traffickers came to Rambo's ranch and were hit by that Napalm-like first strike, they should have immediately reconsidered what they did. I didn't quite buy the cocky-ness of the leader after they were hit with that. It was pretty badass, and would have made anyone immediately more cautious...anyone.

The scenes underground had some moments that were very reminiscent of the original Rambo...with the traps. Problem is, in the original Rambo, we kind of got to know who the Sheriff Deputies were, so it was a little bit more impactful when they got attacked. They were more developed as characters. Most of the gang that got killed in this were meaningless, except for the leader. So, it was just more inventive and creative ways to kill people, then it was revenge on characters we came to hate through their development, not just "because" they were part of the gang. But, I did like how they choreographed that sequence, and I definitely felt Rambo's anger. Stallone really sold this movie. He was a superior actor compared to the rest, and that's because he's played this character enough times to know him, and has over 40 years experience as an actor.

It's a must see for Rambo fans, and more memorable than "Rambo". But, I give it only a 7 because it jumped into the story too fast, the casting was "meh", it was too short. Apparently there is a 20 minute longer version in overseas markets, and I'd like to see it, it may help. Also, some of the cinematography was bad...mostly inside the cars. I think it should have been directed by someone with more experience, or have been put in the hands of the director of the Bourne Series. Rambo deserves a more epically style, scaled, and toned film, like the first 1...even first 3.

Bottom line: I liked it, but was hoping for a little better quality. But, Stallone is still tops with me, believable, and I'm glad his still kicking ass.

The Danish Girl (2015)

Overwrought, overdone, overly dramatic performances...

[30 July 2016]

This was basically a PBS/BBC/Lifetime Network TV movie, but due to it's content and budget it became an independent feature film.

The cinematography was not good, out of touch with the story and moments, and basically seemed a little self-indulgent. Many of the shots seemed like they were chosen because of how cool they looked, and not because it was a reflection of the moment, nor furthered the story. The wide angle lens was the worst choice out of all the lenses...were they saying it was warped?

This movie would have made a better stage play, in story, but mainly due to the over-dramatic nature of the performances that suits the theater and not the cinema.

There was no real sense of drama, and the stakes were very low. Society doesn't accept you...we get it. Most doctors think you're nuts...we get it. You aren't happy with yourself...we get it. Any conflict that was in this story was easily stepped over, and we never, not for one second, thought this guy wasn't going to go through with it. By the way, Eddie Redmayne played this character as more of an effeminate homosexual, than a trapped woman. Alicia VIkander had more balls, sexuality and femininity than Redmayne. There were a lot of woman in this movie, and Redmayne wasn't like any of them.

The more I think about this movie, the worse it seems to get. Too on the nose with every moment, too much Lifetime Network styling, too much theater sensibility. And too much piano. The Kings Speech was better, but still like a stage play.

It's no coincidence that Tom Hopper has a background in both Theater and Television...that's were he should stay. These films aren't cinema, they are filmed TV Plays, and they are better suited for those mediums.

Come to think of it, this movie seems like a parody. The ending was just plan silly (insert introspective piano melody).

Rock the Kasbah (2015)

Quietly Subversive (Spoiler Alerts)

[24 October 2015]

Yeah, I basically saw it because I like the cast, but it was under-whelming, and I was so bored at some points, I almost walked out.

It was a very thin story, and they promoted the heck out of Zooey in the trailers, only to have her gone in the first 10-15 minutes. Kate Hudson's character didn't do much other than root for the home-team. Bill Murray was good, and did what he could with the material he had to work with. I actually liked Scott Caan in this film, better than anything that I've seen him in, and he had flashes of his dad in his performance, which was cool to see. Danny McBride, well, he can't go wrong anymore than Bill Murray. It was nice to see Willis with Bill Murray, but his character was all over the place, and it would actually be nice to see Willis and Murray in a better film together.

The story was a quietly subversive anti-Pashtunwali story, and therefore very liberal, and a little presumptuous.

Finding the girl in the desert was completely contrived and cringe-worthy.

The Cat Stevens song at the end was very clever.

The ending also felt false and hollow, even though this is supposedly inspired by a true story...which would have likely been better told in a more dramatic way.

It seemed to remind me of the film The Men Who Stare at Goats, and was equally as bad.

I give this film about a 5.4 out of 10.

Hollywood Vice Squad (1986)

A remake of the Paul Schrader/George C. Scott film "Hardcore" (1979}

[25 December 2006]

Without seeing this film and reading the plot outline, I can see that this is clearly a rip-off of Paul Schrader's classic film entitled, "Hardcore" starring George C. Scott from 1979. Check out this plot outline from Hardcore: "A conservative Midwest businessman ventures into the sordid underworld of pornography in California to look for his runaway teenage daughter whom is making porno films in the porno pits of Los Angeles. " Sound familiar?

What a rip off of the Scrhrader/Scott classic. It is funny to note and to Carrie Fisher's delight that there are a few references to Star Wars...watch and see, you won't believe your eyes.

Before Sunset (2004)

Linklater did it again...great film, perfect title.

[29 January 2004]

I never expected to see a sequel to Before Sunrise and had I heard that they would be making one, I would have simply asked why. But having seen a screening of it, I profess that Linklater has managed to capture the magic again.

Linklater, et al, have successfully brought us another wonderful and intimate film with Hawke and Delphy. Their characters have grown into adults in a way that you would have hoped and expected without being predictable. Delphy and Hawke have a unique and pleasant chemistry that keeps you rooting for them the whole time. I'm sure these two are very close in real life.

The setting and scenery are perfect and left me longing for a trip to Europe and lamenting the fact that I wasn't actually watching this in Europe.

One of the many things that impressed me the most about this film is the fact that you need not see the first one in order to understand this one. Another thing that impressed me is the perfect title, "If Not Now". I'm glad that this is the title. It would cheat the whole charm of the film if they went with something like, "Before...this", or "After...that". A title like that would only be pandering to the marketing department, not to mention the fact that it would make it sound like Ice Cube's "Friday" series.

Before I conclude I would also like to applaud the fantastic ending. Not many filmmakers can pull and ending off like that without leaving an audience feeling cheated. In this case the opposite is true and I left feeling rewarded and satisfied.