TheOliveBranch Reviews

The Wizard (1989)

What can I say? This was My Childhood

[10/10 · 12 January 2009]

Well, not really. My life story doesn't resemble that of the characters in any way except for our collective love of video games. That said:

I watched this movie so many damn times as a kid it'll make your head spin. What can I say about this movie that you don't already know yourself? Fred Savage. Beau Bridges. Christian Slater. The chick from Rilo Kiley. Spanky.

And then Jimmy brings it all home.

First of all, I want to say that whatever pills the video game contest host was on, I want me some of that. Two, they should bring back the Powerglove. And three, road trip movies will never, ever die.

From Double Dragon to Ninja Gaiden or the nostalgic dinosaur park in the middle of no where, this movie will always remain a classic for me.

"Gimme, gimme, gimme...Jimmy...Woods!!!"

The City (2008–2010)

Haha, wow. Awesome Show. Guys may say I'm gay, Whatever, it's awesome!

[10/10 · 6 January 2009]

OK, whatever guys, call me gay all you want, this show is hilariously awesome. The staged fight in episode 2 between Jay and that model douche? The bitchy hot rich girl? And of course, hot Whitney? This show tickles me rotten whenever I watch it.

I live in Manhattan, I'm 25, and I'm a straight, non metrosexual guy (I swear). I will admit: I have never actually seen a world like this in the few years I've lived here, but that doesn't matter! This show and the other ones like it (Laguna, the Hills) never cease to amaze me. I know it's edited in a way that serves the purposes of the producers, yea yea yea, but isn't that what makes it more awesome? Hopefully they stage more fights between Jay and the jealous models who want Whitney.

Obviously there will be girls between the ages of 10-24 who will really love this show. That goes without saying. And yea, I feel a little awkward when Tampax commercials come on during the breaks. But hey, chalk this one up on my list of guilty pleasures. Bring on the hilarity, I'm gonna sit on my couch and eat potato chips on Saturday afternoon and enjoy the next marathon of this show on MTV.

EDIT: OK, the 1st season is officially over and I heard Jay and Whit broke up? Say it ain't so, Us Weekly! Anyway, I've been to a few of these bars on the show and they are definitely a whole lot grimier and dirty than the show makes them out to be. Brass Monkey in particular.

The Program (1993)

Underrated, Accurate Football Movie Starring the Godfather's James Caan

[8/10 · 20 October 2005]

Trips Bunch. The Power I. The Cover 2. If you know what these terms mean, and understand their uses in football strategy, then you'll really enjoy watching David S. Ward's the Program. Ward also wrote and directed Major League, a great movie; however, with The Program, it is obvious how much his sports writing style has evolved.

The movie traces one season of college football for a once dominant, but now struggling Division 1 powerhouse, the fictional ESU Timeberwolves. James Caan is hilarious and well-cast as the Head Coach on the hot seat, and it's really great watching him deal with serious issues both on and off the field. Craig Shaeffer does a solid job at both his role and the QB position. His character is like a young, much more tortured Steve Young: he can throw the long ball, he can buy time with his feet, and he can do it all while battling inner demons. Omar Epps (the Wood) is simply perfectly cast as Darnell Jefferson, the prototype freshman Tailback fighting for his spot on the 1st team (plus the beautiful Halle Berry plays his love interest).

The movie is filled with hilariously awesome lines and performances, and is a classic among people who actually play football. While the editing work could be scrutinized among movie Nazis (the editing job when Kane and his girl are riding his motorcycle is questionable at times), the good far outweighs the bad. Namely, the in-helmet camera work really puts you on the field with them. Overall, David S. Ward does an excellent job of jumping from perspective to perspective, and it quickly builds into this chaotic, early 90s mosaic of Division 1 college football. And surprisingly, the issues explored in the film really resonate with the issues going on in today's sports (i.e. Steroids, Motorcycle death wishes).

Listen, if you haven't seen this movie, and you love football, and are of mild intelligence, then you are either really young or really lucky that you missed it because I wish i could watch it again for the first time. However, if you have no appreciation for the game of football, you're better off going elsewhere. Football idealists, be warned as well. This movie is the anti-Rudy. It's the story of one school's fight for a bowl bid, and fighting for that bid at all costs.

PS- My vote is very biased. I love to quote this movie with friends. I love to watch football on both Saturday and Sunday. I play fantasy football. I play Madden. I played Division 3 football in college. You have been warned.