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Zvyozdniy razum (2022)
Production value not enough to carry horrible "everything else"
First off, I cannot fault the CGI and set designs of this movie. The CGI is great and little details made it look very good. The sets, especially on the spaceship(s) were spot on.
Now the bad part. The acting. I don't remember seeing a movie with worst acting in a major film. They are flat and not convincing at all. The story itself has no character development, so we have no idea who these people are.
The logic of the story is iffy, but the dialogue and actors just drag it all down.
If you want to see some cool CGI, watch it...just turn off the sound.
Confessions of a Time Traveler - The Man from 3036 (2020)
Horrible. Robots and pod homes
First thing that should be apparent is in 1000 years, language hasn't changed. He sounds exactly like an American from 2020. I was expecting some slang or words we wouldn't know...like someone from the 1020 coming to 2020.
So he accidentally time travels here and makes a movie that people in the future can see and it's "off the record"... Just a horrible script done by a 3rd grader probably.
War of the Worlds (2019)
Only first episode, I hope it takes off. 1st episode is character development
As you would expect it is sortof like Contact/Independence Day on how a signal is received. I don't have a problem with the formula changing from the original. Every demographic seems to be hit and it's kindof annoying the blatant pandering to every type of audience member. I think there are some technical issues with the attack ... I'll just leave it at this: Can cell phones work inside elevators? I'll keep watching it until it gets stupid beyond repair. Hoping for the best
Curb Your Enthusiasm: Happy New Year (2020)
Over the top Larry, but funny
Just *more* of Larry and seeing how far he can push it. Sort of steals from his own Soup Nazi episode, but I did laugh constantly. He's just a interesting character that you love being the fly-on-the-wall audience member.
John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)
Hit-man who can't hit
First off, character development: NONE I could care less who lived or died in this movie
The gunfire scenes are laughable. None of the bad guys work together and they all come out of hiding and basically yell "shoot me". One after the other, they keep coming and yet can't seem to get the idea of hiding behind anything for protection
He does meet up with a guy who seems to be (almost) his equal and of course, no baddies are around to help
At least the female villain was dispatched of quickly.
Lots of "rules" that no one seems to obey.
Morpheus and Neo together again...uhhh, NO
Bad Moms (2016)
He-woman man hater's club
I watched with my wife and there were a few funny parts..but this movie is strictly for women to watch. It's not that the guys won't get the jokes, apparently, only women are parents in this movie.
You can't be in the PTA unless you're a woman in this movie All husbands are idiots Male bosses are idiots
It has the formula for a movie where there's something bad about 80% into the movie and then everything turns out good at the end.
This is a good brainless movie...I can't even imagine if I paid money for this at a theater
I only give it a 4 because I think women will get some of the obvious jokes. 1 if you're a man
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)
Straight to Star Trek V status
I've seen the original movie probably 5 times and really like it. This one has little to do with the first, which is good. However, unlike other franchises where the second movie improves, this goes straight to Star Trek V status IMHO. There are way too many jokes. This may as well be labeled comedy-SciFi. Everyone likes comedies, but the jokes are repetitive and I was wondering when a fart joke was going to show up. The plot/logic is just "poke you in the ribs" annoying. The first scene with the fight. Why? It's almost as if they had a purpose built arena to fight the bad guy with the batteries (which no one explains) there for the taking. The people who hire the Guardians clearly have defensive capabilities and somehow have knowledge of this bad guy coming and don't use them...even though throughout the movie, they are more than willing to.
Ego..Death Star..'nuf said
Lots of questions like why didn't Ego just take Starlord at anytime before his mother died. Ego clearly indicates that Starlord is very important to his plans.
And then there's Yondu's arrow. This is clearly 100x more powerful than the entire Guardians' arsenal. Him and Peter's ascent into space was exactly like Peter's and Gamora's in the first movie, yet....
Why does Ego have to sleep?
The whole time, during any shoot out, you'll be wondering when it will end because no one can hit anyone else. If they do get hit and crash. No big deal, they'll just bounce right back and repair it.
Little Groot is suppose to be cute and they over do that too...but that will get the kids into the movie.
Anyway, If you've seen Star Trek V, then you'll get the references when you watch this movie.
The Thinning (2016)
For a land of smart people, why is everyone so stupid
Just a few nitpicky things that will drive you nuts.
1) This is a thinning of the population via testing scores. So why are all the security guards so stupid. Also, who is going to want to work at Burger Queen? 2) A test this important that can easily be cheated or manipulated..not likely 3) No funerals for the people killed? 4) I was gathering from the dialog that Texas has this test but other states may not. Why live there? (or in the USA if it the only testing country) 5) Did I mention the guards... not only are they stupid, they can't fight either 6) There is no twist at the end because wouldn't there be fewer people to take the test each year, hence no need to make LOTS of testing machines?
Elysium (2013)
Why can't Earth have MedBeds?????
This is a pretty good movie..lots of action. But the whole STUPID medbeds thing where they regen ANYTHING for humans...why is it only on the space station?
The whole point of a takeover was about money...think how much money a company would make with a medbed.
One other minor point is the main character who seems to morph in and out of radiation sickness
oh yeah, forgot.. why can't they have Elysium on Earth???
Other than those very annoying plot lines, it's a cool movie.
Lots of action and District 9 look
The Hunger Games (2012)
Running Man/LOTR meets every "last man standing" movie
First off, didn't read the books..get that out of the way. But my 11 y/o son did. I'll just mention that he said they missed a lot of important parts about the storyline.
There is very little character build-up. You just kind of have to guess what is going on with these characters. There are 24 selected combatants who are give about two weeks to prepare. First off, it's insane to think a 12 y/o girl can compete against an 18 y/o (professionally trained) man. However, that seems fair to this "advanced" government. So, after 2 weeks of preparation, their plans are to die instantly or run away. There are few battles and you get just a countdown of everyone dying off in the distance somewhere. There's a gang of 5 or 6 that KNOW only one can survive, but no one back-stabs (literally) anyone. The rules change and are very predictable. Somehow, without explanation, the controllers of the game can make fire bombs appear or mutant dogs, but for some reason "sponsors" can help. Why do they need help when there's 10000 lbs of supplies at the start? It's really annoying to watch..I can't imagine reading the books without being annoyed as well. I give it a 3/10 to my son's dismay.
Apollo 18 (2011)
There's a reason NASA kept it (the story) hidden
There are several aspects of the movie that I'll comment about.
1) Camera work
It gets REALLY annoying after a while with all the fake film effects to make it look like the early 70s..even though the sound is perfect. There are cameras everywhere and none of them seem to be pointing at anything except the action. The interference to the radio system also seems to effect rolls of film.
2) Sound effects
They use the same "scare tactic" sound effect to make you jump out of your seat. After about the 3rd time, you just plug your ears to save your eardrums from the abuse.
3) Story
The story if pretty weak. I won't give away the main point, but you know there are *things* on the moon and NASA/DOD is going to go about it this way to learn about them... uh...no.
4) The Ending Yes, I agree with the rest. The ending is stupid an implausible...especially the last 2 seconds...make that impossible.
You will squirm in your seat debating whether or not to leave, so wait for it on PPV when you're really bored.
The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia (2009)
OK film about not so OK family
I watched this film and didn't really care what happened to anyone. They are all selfish, self-centered, dangerous, manipulative people. There's a reason why they keep reminding you who the people are because you really don't care. The only one I really cared about was the newborn baby.
This movie can't compete with American Hollow for character development. This movie even copied the idea of showing what happens when you get out of the county.
I'm not sure what the goal of the filmmaker was. At the end of the movie, I just felt like it re-enforced my view of hicks in West Virginia. I know they are the minority and there are good people there that should have been shown somewhere in the film besides the officials pointing out the problems with the Whites.
4/10 for making me constantly shake my head...I must be dizzy for giving it that high of a score.
Dawn of the Dead (1978)
I can't think of one thing that was good
The "plot" is so bad that they don't explain how Zombies started or what the government is doing except for arguing...so I guess you on your own.
The acting is..BAD. After a short while of their stupidity and bad acting, you want the main characters to die. You are left wondering how they survived this far in the first place.
The makeup is pretty bad too. It wouldn't be so bad if they didn't use "hot pink" colored blood. This movie was obviously to showcase the makeup department and special effects..that's the only reason I didn't give it a 1.
I like Zombie movies and this one was just painful to watch. I have no idea how it has garnered an 8 on IMDb. Just because it's really bad doesn't mean it deserves a high vote. They didn't mean for it to be bad.
I think anyone who has seen a few zombie movies would also be annoyed at how bad this was written and why you wouldn't do 99% of the things these characters did to try and save themselves. They had no contingency plan at all.
There are four main characters 1) Normal guy who for some reason turns into a lunatic 2) Normal guy who stays normal 3) Idiot guy who stays an idiot 4) Woman who smokes while pregnant...awesome
Besides #2, I was hoping to see the other three off'd within the first 30 minutes. There are scenes with roaming zombies for minutes at a time...ugh.
Again, just because it was made by some famous comic-con people...doesn't make it worth watching.
Rampage (2009)
Action was good, but direction and story fails
So, we have Bill...an underachiever...that's it. There's really not much conflict in his life. Story tries to portray a "Taxi Driver" type guy in the beginning, but they seem to give up on that idea.
Given that he's in a dead-end job and eats junk food all the time, you would think it would be difficult to purchase all the weapons he had...I guess not.
There "rampage" is the most interesting part. Even some humor in it. There's not much resistance, probably due to the budget ;)
There's a cameo with Michael Paré as a sheriff. He gets high billing, says about 10 words and gets killed so easily that they must have paid him by the hour.
The ending was lacking...as the audience, we want to see what Bill does with his "winnings". What was his end-game besides money? Then the worst part, the last 20 seconds. Here is the real **SPOILER**.
He's been so smart in planning all of this, but he delivers an internet video????? ... and it proceeds to tell us the police came and found incriminating evidence and he's sentenced to death..UGH. That's like ... I don't know... War of the Worlds. The equivalent ending would be: Martians beat mankind with their technology and got what they wanted... epilogue: Oh yeah, they got sick and died from bacteria..THE END.
Hey story writers...it's OK if the bad guys win.
Anyway 5/10 for the "rampage" part, just don't get frustrated if they don't explain the why.
District 9 (2009)
Average Sci-Fi Flick
Just because a movie is filmed in a Documentary format, does not make it a great movie. If you just go by what formulas movie makers go by, this movie has everything. They could have explained more about the Aliens so perceived plots holes would not annoy the audience. However, in general, no one really cares about the aliens because they look like walking lobsters. The film makers try to humanize them by having the parents protect a baby alien...but again, just because it's a small alien doesn't mean we have to like him.
The main character is really a bad..bad person. We are to believe this guy, who looks like a low level manager, is going to be charge of a mass migration of the prawn to another camp. Except, there are 1.8 million of them and he's going door-to-door to evict them...ugh. He clearly has no morals when it comes to the aliens. I found it very annoying when is he asked to shoot one later in the film that he has a problem with it based on the fact he killed several baby prawn earlier in the film (in a quite nasty way). He's also a mass killer of government employees (his direct colleagues in some cases). Again, just not a guy you are going to root for too much.
The actor who plays him is a nobody and that carries over to the character. He's actually hard to understand sometimes with his heavy South African accent.
His infection with alien DNA is believable, but the fact what infected him is a fuel source that can power ships is not so believable. DNA cannot do everything and it's not silly putty.
I do like the alien weaponry and the DNA on/off switch (ala Stargate TV series). Some pretty cool effects and those scenes are quite enjoyable to watch.
Overall, I do like the action and pace of the film. I enjoy Alien visits Earth movies, but this comes off as Alien Nation meets The Fly. I give it a 7/10 because of its uniqueness. Remember that 7/10 in the real world is a C- ;)
There is no way this is better than let's say, Alien or Aliens.
Would I recommend it in a theater? Yes, a matinée priced showing.
Autumn (2009)
Painful to watch
To start off, I really like end-of-the world type movies. You think to yourself what you would do in that situation and you can play them out in your head as the movie progresses.
Here, we have something "killing" people. No one knows what it is. No one who survives really cares why they are still living. No one is asking each other what common denominators they have that might make them immune to whatever is killing everyone else. That's when you need a scientist cast into one of the roles. However, the reason why everyone is dead is totally ignored throughout the film.
OK, so you are one of the survivors. What to do? Well, according to some of them (and by the way, we don't know how many there are...but a dozen or so seem to show up pretty quickly in the first few minutes and none after that...go figure) they need to get out of the city and go someplace safe. According to the logic, they should pick a fairly secure area where the awakening dead, general bad guys, and disease can't get to them easily. What do they do? They pick a farm out in the middle of no where that is easily breached..even by mindless corpses. I don't really care for Zombie type movies, but these zombies are worthless. They are like wind up toys who run into buildings...ooohhh, real scary.
The main characters themselves are just stupid people. You constantly want to tell them they are doing it all wrong. I think an obvious solution to the zombies would be to setup a noise making device far away from where you live so they are attracted to it...but no, that would be too easy. Why not make noises where you live and attract them. I'm sure they smell great and that's one reason to keep them around.
One thing that was great was to see the same road shot over and over again with the same cars on it. It's even in the trailer. Since the audience is assumed to be so dumb, why not just re-shoot the same road; no one will notice.
I was half expecting there to be at least some competition for the lone female...that didn't happen. I guess she was not attractive enough to fight for.
We are told the zombies have no pulse and I'm thinking how they are suppose to have locomotion. I would think that after about 2 months, their corpses would have fallen off the bone or at least the animals/bugs would have taken care of them.
I could go on and on, but if you want to be annoyed beyond comprehension, feel free to watch this movie. Oh, and whatever you do...if this happens in real life, make sure you ride around in a piece of junk van instead of a fully loaded luxury SUV. I would...because we all know we would want to make our lives as miserable as possible since we could do anything we want.
Ali (2001)
So when is the sequel?
I watched this with my son and wife since he was doing a report on Ali for school.
I normally enjoy Will Smith movies and he does a good job portraying my ideal of Ali.
However, there is little substance in this movie, even though it is more than 2 hours long.
For one thing, the movie ends just after the George Foreman fight. He had 14 more fights after that. Apparently, Ali's life wasn't very interesting after 1974.
There is ZERO relationship building with his corner... Jamie Foxx's character is built up a bit, but not much. His wives??? I guess they didn't play much of a role in his life. There was one sentence about him having affairs on the side.
What happens is that the audience is suppose to be an educated audience. They are suppose to know the whole story already (i.e. rope-a-dope)
Even the boxing was in slow motion. No excitement at all. Writer/Director: Hey, since they know the outcome already, let's just fill in this part.
The political commentary...well, if you're going to do it..do it right!
I only give it a 5 because Smith played a convincing role. No one should be giving this a 1 or 2, but no way is it a 9 or 10 either. ...right down the middle. If you have 2+ hours of your life to waste..have at it.
100 Million BC (2008)
Claymation would have helped
OK, saw this on SCI-FI the other day. The story had some promise. Going back in time to save stranded scientists. The pseudo-science was "solid"....kindof like Stargate. However, if I left a wormhole open, wouldn't you test the gadget and send someone through and come right back before sending everyone at once.
However, it all went wrong with the HORRIBLE special effects. It would have been better if they left them out. The CGI isn't even at Jurassic Park levels from 15 years ago.
Also, why bother shooting dinosaurs if either they can't hit them or bullets have no effect. But they'll fall right onto spears and die.
Why is this called 100 million BC if they go back 65-ish million years? WHY!!!!! That's like calling the movie 300, 450. I'm sure botanists were having a laugh-fest at all the trees, grasses...etc that should not have existed.
No one being rescued seemed particularly interested in being rescued. I would like "let's get the heck outta here".
I could go on, but you get the point. I can't even recommend it for viewing on TV, you'll just get annoyed watching it
Blindness (2008)
Extremely frustrating
First, I IMDb needs to filter out anyone who reads the book before the movie. Hated it, Loved it, Read the Book...
My wife and I saw this movie together. The premise of everyone going blind was interesting in the beginning. However, there is no explanation as to why it happens or how it spreads...nothing. So we are left with..."OK, it's contagious and everyone is getting it"..fine.
Then the blind are send to a quarantine camp...which nobody seems to care about. There are no doctors testing them, they live like animals, and the inevitable in-fighting occurs....big surprise. Why? These are the first infected people (basically patient zero).
There is a woman who can see...the wife of an eye doctor (another guy who could care less what happened). She should be "queen of the blind", but relegates herself to nurse duties. Even the other blind men easily take control of the facility. This would be truly impossible if there was a sighted person there. It would be SO easy to do whatever you want...sortof like the invisible man. This is where my wife and I were having real problems with the movie....the woman is not an idiot, she just has her parts written that way. Oh yeah, why do the bad guys want jewelry and such for food??? Why would they do this? Food is 10000x more valuable.
They make their way back to civilization after a brief fight with the bad guys. Everyone is looking for food and she finds some pretty easily (what you would expect). And of course almost fights to the death to keep it after some blind people attack her. I wanted to scream "Just go back and get some more!!!"
Again, no one seems to care why she was the only person who didn't go blind (that we know of)... nothing was answered and there was no real conclusion to the movie. We were to assume everybody got "better'???
Nudity. I understood the reason for it in the beginning and in the camp. I had no idea what the *#*$# the shower scene with the girls at the end was for? Anyone want to explain that? Trying to sell tickets I guess.
Dumb. 3/10...for the beginning only.
Watch 28 days later...even with the zombie principle, it's so much better.
Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008)
Not too bad. 8 y/o liked it
I had to look and see how many actors were credited. They must have spent all their money on Frasier because they only had like 10 people in the whole movie.
One dinosaur, one kid, one girl, one hero, one easy movie to watch.
They could have done a lot more with it. The premise is kind of silly, but somehow they survive. There is zero suspense.
I think it's a good kids movie. Don't bring your brain or you'll hate it.
The CGI is "ok". There are OBVIOUS green screen shots in many places. I'm not sure if that is a side-effect of the 3D technology.
6/10
The Dark Knight (2008)
No way is this #1, but not too bad
There were just too many "what the ???"'s in this movie for me. Like the hospital blowing up. Wouldn't anyone notice someone placing all the explosives...etc...there's lots of things like that in the movie where the Joker somehow comes out of nowwhere to be the most powerful villain in the city.
His demise at the end is another worthless scene...I have no idea what happened.
Batman's voice is very hard to understand at times.
He has like 1 or 2 cool toys..that's it. James Bond out-does him there.
Another love story...ugh. I had enough of that with Spiderman...not to mention that she looks EXACTLY like spiderman's girlfriend.
The action scenes are good, but nothing extreme and there aren't a lot of them.
Of course, you knew the commish was gonna get it when you heard the Lt.'s name was Gordon.
I personally think Aliens or T2 should be #1, but hey, that's just me. There is NO WAY you will come out of the theater like I did when I saw Aliens or T2.
Almost every scene is basically dark/and or wet. Typical batman movie. Kind of annoying.
7/10 because it was a pretty good summer flick. It might be a while before I watch it again. I think the more you watch it, the more it "might" get better...at least, that's what I hope.
The Happening (2008)
War of the Worlds without the Martians
Just a quick comment. I thought the movie was interesting, but the actresses in the movie are...terrible. The lead woman character is mind-numbingly boring to listen to. The 8-year old girl (looks older) has the personality of a fish.
It's a pretty good horror-flick...as those go.
There was no real(good) explanation as to why everything was Happening(sic).
I can't imagine it cost very much to make this movie. Very little CGI and only a few shooting locations. This requires the story to carry the movie, but of course, unlike the sixth sense, there is no conclusion to the movie.
5/10...wait for the DVD.
The Man from Earth (2007)
Total letdown and too little story
First, this "movie" looks like a play put to the big screen. I looks like it should be in a theater. It does not translate well.
Second, the story just has too many holes and not enough answers. The guy has 14,000 years to finally tell the "truth" to his friends and this is the best he can do? He has very few details and the story goes too far to explain why the author couldn't provide those details by saying that it's too hard to remember details.
He provides no proof, which, like believing in a god, would be a clincher. Waiting for him to provide this proof, I guess I was asking too much. How hard would it be to show a 100 year old picture of yourself?
He studied with Buddha and was Jesus...ugh. I think the writer must have evolved the whole story around that. (i.e. No childhood of Jesus and appeared around 35 y/o, and survived a crucifixion)
The ending was SOOOOO weak. He "accidently" blurbs out the he use to be some guy who happened to be the father of one of his friends, who happens to die from the shock. Hey, that's convenient. Why bother telling your girlfriend, when you can tell your son?
Acting: I think the main lead guy did a good job with what he had. The director must have told everyone else to overact by acting "intelligently angry" the whole movie.
Science Fiction is a generous genre to put this into. I think the poster art is cool and obviously was hoping for more.
My wife walked out 1/2 way thru and I had to tell her the rest of the story, which took 4 seconds of my time.
Son of the Mask (2005)
Not as bad as the mob mentality suggests
Actually, Son of the Mask did make me laugh a few times...mostly due to the cartoonish jokes that made Bugs Bunny and Roadrunner so funny. The CGI is very impressive and is used extensively in this movie. Garfield, for example, is no where on par for CGI, but I would give it the same vote.
Everyone knows the story...which wasn't that bad for a KIDS movie. Yes, it is a KIDS movie...and therefore should be treated as such. Jamie Kennedy is not very good in his role. His attempts to act "crazy" are not very good and overall acting is poor.
Everyone else is not too bad.
Basically, my 2 and 5 year old watched the whole thing without complaining. At least I was able to sit through this.
There is no way this movie is worst than **shudder** Class of 1999
4/10 for the CGI and a few laughs.