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Star Trek: Catspaw (1967)
The poor little things
This episode held my interest up until the end--the technology that can pose and pass for ancient Earth sorcery, the rivalrous game of malice the aliens "Korob" and "Sylvia" play with each other, the old-school horror movie ambience, the sight of the Enterprise being overheated by something very like a Voodoo doll...
....then it ended. Korob and Sylvia were revealed in their true forms as two strange-looking little invertebrates, too weak to survive on the harsh planet they're marooned on without whatever protection and life support their power crystals provided. And so they died, twitching and panicking, screeching with terror and pain in their shrill little alien voices, and shrivelling away to nothing as the Enterprise watched detachedly (with Spock even making a rather cold blooded observation about how it's too bad they can't preserve them for specimens) .It just struck me as sad, cruel, and pitiful. I really felt sorry for them. They were tiny weak things trying to survive in a vast and hostile universe (as are we all) who failed and died miserably. It says something good about Mr. Bloch's skills as a screenwriter that these villainous characters, too strange and feeble to even exist, moved my emotions so strongly.
Fresh Airedale (1945)
So cruel, so unfair
I get that it's satire, but even as a little kid seeing this one on Mr. Cartoon, I was struck by how cruel and unfair it was. The poor cat (wh tries to be a good pet) is kicked, insulted, framed for a household crime, and worse, while the smarmy evil dog is repeatedly awarded for his ill behavior. And it doesn't get any better.
The nightmare sequence ("Number One Dog! *Number One Dog!*) is the funniest part of the whole carton,but the end just makes me sad and tired.
Elephant Walk (1954)
Turgid tropical soap opera with a thrilling conclusion
The last ten minutes, when the thirst crazed pahcyderms break the wall and come onto the plantation--where they smash things and chase Elizabeth Taylor, and finally burn down the mansion--is exciting or even hilarious in spots.
Too bad the elephant marauders don't make the previous two hours of tedious jungle soap opera worth watching.
Land of the Pharaohs (1955)
the conclusion [spoilers, obviously]
The last few minutes are the best part of the movie. The moment when the big budget, sand-and-sex soap opera turns into an EC HORROR COMIC STORY!
The machinery of the tomb tomb sealing itself is visually fascinating what with the breaking glass and sliding slabs of stone and the sand pourimg everywhere. It's sort of genius ancient Rube Goldberg macinery.
. Then Nellifer realizes what she's bought for herself is a horrible death in the dark with a man who literally hates her, and she screams and screams and screams, it's exactly a classic precode horror comic's twist ending. and almost makes the previous two turgid hours of cinema worthwhile
Alfred Hitchcock Presents: Revenge (1955)
Based on a story from pre-Comics Code horror comics!
The story first appeared in EC Comic's *Shock Suspense Stories* circa 1954; in the original, the traumatized victim isn't the narrator's wife, but his mildly demented father.
A sort of copycat version appeared in Harvey's *Black Cat Comics* that same year, in which the victim was the narrator's new wife and concludes with the line "My beautiful wife...was CRAZY!"
Dastardly and Muttley in Their Flying Machines (1969)
Pretty darned funny, especially for late-60s HB
As even the most shameless of us old-cartoon freaks will readily or reluctantly admit, most of Hanna-Barberra's made-for-TV output from around 1966 onward was, to put it plainly, *c*r*a*p*!. Severely limited, almost minimalist animation; lame premises; imbecilic storytelling and humor, and those uber-repetitive characterizations and chase sequences and whole entire series....BUT every now and then even the humdrum HB hive knocked one out of the ballpark. "Dastardly and Muttley in Their Flying Machines" aka "Stop That Pigeon!" was a rarity in its hilarity -- it couuld make you laugh until your head almost fell off. There was a lopt of funny there -- the flabbergastacious flying machines! those two maladroit minions! (especially KLUNK with his psychotic genius-jargon babble-gab)! The heroic pigeon who was just so freaking OBNOXIOUS with his little tootly-tootly bugle that you wanted the bad guys to shoot him right out of the sky! And of course that greatest of all bad meany cartoon canines, the masterful MUTTLEY! Oh, how I loves me some Muttley. He's one of the funniest two-legged dogs who ever walked the cartoon Earth on two legs, especially when he gets pissed off or disgruntled. I can still do a passable Muttley Mumble myself: "Saggafrassinbaggamakkinsuggasuumbtcgmuttafubbarickrassrdly!" Not his sneaky wheezy dirty-old-dawg laugh, though; that's actually inimitable.
Near Dark (1987)
It would be one of the all-time best vampire flicks, except for the astoundingly stupid resolution.
Damn, this movie could've been good. Hell with that, it could've been great. It's got everything--an excellent cast playing fascinating and nuanced characters,,a wild premise (white trash vampires on the road!), great dialog, and atmosphere galore, topped off with spectacular sequences of blood-soaked violent horror.
It's got all that, *and* one of the most jaw-droppingly stupid and contrived devices in any horror movie, ever. If you've seen ND or read or heard much about it, you'll know exactly what I mean. If you haven't, well I'll put it like this: a convenient bit of information never encountered in any other vampire movie, book or folklore collection seems to have been thrown together just to give the flick a commercially acceptable ending.
Plot: a handsome young cow-puncher is bitten by a cute, country-style vampire chick. Love, death and madness ensue.
The tribe of vamps are the best characters in the movie:scary-sexy, sexy charismatic Civil War vet Jesse, his hot-bodied cold-blooded tattooed bad-momma Diamondback, exuberantly sadistic Sevrin (was he maybe an Olde Weste outlaw while he lived?) Homer, the creepy, obnoxious, scary, funny but ultimately pitiful vampire kid who gets the best death scene in the whole movie, and Mae the aforementioned cute bloodsucker chick who brings photogenic young lout Caleb into the story.,.
The creators *really* shouldn't have gone for that stupid, made-up ending, though. *Near Dark" wqould've been a near perfect horror movie if they'd done it different..
Miracle Mile (1988)
Suspenseful, soulful, bizarre and believable -- an underrated classic!
I first saw this movie 15 years ago; then the night before last I stumbled onto it again. All I remembered was the central device of the hero answering the fatal phone call, and that it was a *real good flick*. So I rented it again...
Wow. From the moment Harry tosses his lit cigarette and thus sets his part in the unfolding drama into motion, it's a heartpounding, heartbreaking ride to the inevitable conclusion. The story's unsettlingly plausible -- who hasn't answered a ringing pay phone? And what would we do in a similar situation? All the characters are believable and mostly likable, albeit some of them strangely so. And despite the human depravity of thermonuclear destruction, it says a lot about the good parts of people -- the doomed attempt of the cop to save his partner, the way the grandparents reconcile, the return of the helicopter pilot for Harry and Julie.
At the end, I looked at my partner and all I could say was "At least the old folks got to have their sandwich before it all hit", and then I busted out crying. It's that kind of movie.
Jack the Giant Killer (1962)
An exciting, fun fantasy movie for kids and un-jaded adults
Count me in as another who loves this rollicking fantasy extravaganza! My folks took me to the drive-in movies to see it way back when I was a wee shorty, and oh my gosh! was I ever excited and thrilled. I played Jack for months afterward, slashing up all sorts of bushes that stood in for giants and dragons and devils with my lathe-wood sword. The scene with the eerie glowing witches and demons ranks right up there with some of the Wicked Witch's star turns in *The Wizard Of Oz* as one of childhood's most delectably terrifying cinematic moments.
While the SFX are sort of goofy-looking by today's standards, that's not a drawback for kids seeing the movie, and grownups who can get past their expectations of CGI-level realism should be able to appreciate them as well.
I saw it once as an adult and was surprised to realize how many images and moments of dialog had stuck in my mind ever since. I'd love to see it again soon.