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cthon98
Reviews
Captain Marvel (2019)
It's not your birthday but you can still have a good time!
Captain Marvel is a move that is not primarily for straight white dudes. If this makes you angry, it's because you've essentially showed up at somebody else's birthday party and pitched a fit that the presents aren't for you. You are still welcome to enjoy the party, and I sure enjoyed the movie.
Captain Marvel takes everything marvel has been working out throughout the tone of their movies, notably in the progression of the Thor movies, and strikes a fantastic balance. It has the right amounts of humor without being too over the top. It has tons of action without any of the fights seeming repetitive. It has an intriguing and easy enough to follow plot. It has an excellent sound track, and excellent visuals. It has Samuel L Jackson somehow transplanted from the 90s. I wonder what current day Sam Jackson was doing while this movie was being made?
It hits a lot of the right notes, nothing feels forced or over the top. Every bit of it had me wanting more.
If you're still reading at this point, I'm going to warn you, there's likely to be stuff you *could* consider spoilers ahead. I'll try to not outright just spell out major plot points, but I do want to touch on themes and messages that were in there, and I don't want to ruin the surprise of seeing them for the first time for you. So, if you don't want to reach anything that could be spoilerish, this would be a good time to stop reading.
Seriously. I'm being really wordy here to give you lots of chance to realize that there could be SPOILERS AHEAD and if you keep on reading you may see something you consider a spoiler. Last chance.
Ok. For folks who are cool with that, and folks who have seen the movie:
I really liked how the movie clearly had a female POV to a lot of it. Carol's own experiences with men telling her she was too weak/shouldn't be doing things. A very real picture of toxic masculinity and sexism in all aspects of life.
They even had a scene where a dude actually told her she should smile more, and then handled it poorly when she didn't acknowledge him, and my god that's the most on the nose thing I've seen. Especially in light of a lot of the negative review-bomb reviews complaining about her smile. Like guys, do you know you're pretty much a self parody at this point?
I also solidly enjoyed the final "fight" scene, in which Jude Law's character Yon-Rogg, like every internet gatekeeper ever, challenges Brie Larsen's character to prove herself on his terms, and she dispatches him on her terms, stating she doesn't have to prove anything.
And this is the correct response to all those gatekeepers who insist you aren't a *real* fan because you don't know some obscure piece of trivia about some guy who was a backup inker on issue 67 of Web of Spider-Man or whatnot. You *don't* owe anybody anything, let alone to answer a challenge on their terms to prove you belong. You already belong.
I also love how they handled Nick Fury's eye. That's one of those things where you expect it to be some climactic battle, or perhaps on some future spy mission he gets betrayed or something, but the truth of it is so much more real, and in a way, mundane. It's delightful. They took an approach that says "Not everything has to feed into your power fantasy."
Overall, if you've got an issue with this movie, that's fine. It's not for you. But if you're saying it's "bad" because "it's just like The Last Jedi" - the only thing those movies have in common is a female lead and a black supporting lead. What does that say about you?
If you are saying that Brie Larsen's smile is the issue (which is an actual thing negative reviews are being flooded with) then you are missing the point. Heck, the movie even makes the point and you still missed it, with it almost spelled out for you.
If you are saying that it's "Sjw" or "pandering" or "forced diversity" then you are human dogcrap. Go rot on someone else's lawn.
This is a well made move. It's a well acted movie. It has excellent visuals. It has excellent music. It is overall enjoyable. It. Is. A. Good. Movie.
I will see this movie in theater at least 5 times to spite you, and I will thoroughly enjoy it every single time, because it is a good move.
And Goose is adorable.
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Dreamworks and Netflix nailed it again!
Holy cow, this show is delightful! It's like "Sailor Moon" and "Steven Universe" had a baby, and then the baby was raised by "Voltron: Legendary Defender" and "She-Ra: Princess of Power."
It feels much more story and character driven and much less 'toy sales' driven. The voice acting is perfect, the animation is fun, the facial expressions make me giggly, and the music is pretty suitable. That first time she says "For the honor of Grayskull" gave me actual goosebumps.
Freddy vs Ghostbusters (2004)
Best Freakin Fan Film EVER
Holy crap. This has got to be one of the best, if not THE best fan film I have ever seen. And it even beats the hell out of 3/4 of the stuff that Hollywood has out these days. Seriously... Shark Boy and Lava Girl? Anyways, this movie... it's freakin awesome. Special effects quite similar to those of the original Ghostbusters movie, GREAT Freddy voice acting, good plot, excellent props. I would pay for a movie of this caliber, yet they offer it on their site for free. And the alternate endings.... also hilarious. Especially the dance ending. I just about shat myself laughing at Freddy flailing around to "Safety Dance" all in all, these guys should get the Nobel prize or something.
Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001)
Slays Vampires, brings the house down
Quite possibly the best independent film I have ever seen. Jesus modernizes himself, teams up with a Mexican-style wrestler, and kicks major vampire ass. Good humor, great action (Stop frame slide after the kick in the atheist fight scene was genius) I own the special edition DVD, and it's great. Not every good movie has to be a multi-million dollar Hollywood production. Kung fu fighting, and good old wrestling. God appearing as a bowl of cherry desert was HILARIOUS, and it had enough music to officially count as a musical. If you watch ONE B-style independent film in your life, make it this one. Guaranteed to become a timeless classic.