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More Black Dirty Debutantes 30 (2001)
Jaimee meets Ed
I have been a fan of Ed for a while. I discovered his material while reading an adult forum. I was impressed. Here was an average guy punching far above his weight. Not only did he have sex with more women than most rockstars, but many of them were out of his league. Best of all he has documented proof of every intimate encounter on video, so can prove without a shadow of a doubt it happened.
For those who do not know, The Dirty Debutante series documents a woman's entry into the adult business. Simply put, Ed records the woman's first sexual experience on film, with him doing the honours. The official tag is he is helping them break into the industry, but the truth is it is just a way for him to get down their pants. Surprisingly there are many women who are eager to participate.
Ed has to be admired for taking advantage of an amazing opportunity. When he first started the series people probably thought he was crazy. I mean, what women in their right mind would have sex with a stranger and allow the occasion to be filmed? Obviously many considering the thousands of women in his films.
The pretense of "making a movie" is the perfect excuse for a man to find and get close to a woman, no matter his physical shortcomings. Ed has used this to maximum effect. Just looking at him you can tell he'd have trouble meeting women in real life, let alone for sex. Grabbing a camera and paying women to have sex on screen was the best alternative. He could have gotten hookers, but there is a negative stigma associated with prostitutes. Generally no one brags about that, let alone puts it on film. Adult stars or potential wannabes are viewed differently and generally in higher regard. With the world watching they also need to "perform" at their best; something a prostitute is not obligated to do.
You have to respect Ed for his honesty. He doesn't hide the fact he pays the girls, which says much about his integrity. Payment or not the truth is undeniable: he has had sex with thousands of women, often without protection. In a real life situation girls would demand a condom until trust has been built. This takes time. The girls in Ed's movies are tested prior to "working" so are deemed safe. They are still strangers, but have lowered their guard for Ed. He bypasses the trust issue and is given full access to their bodies. Here they learn he is a very skilled lover and can bring them to climax. Many of them even have multiple orgasms and are glad they had sex with him.
They say that variety is the spice of life. In Ed's case this rings very true. He has had sex with women from every side of the globe and in all flavours. White, black, Asian, African, Latin, Middle-Eastern, European, Polynesian, Native American, South American, African, Eskimo, and even Indian; he has sampled them all. The best part is he shares these very special moments with us on film.
The quality of women can vary greatly. He has "worked" with some amazingly beautiful women, but the majority have been average, with half being well under. I would not say any are ugly, but there are those who do not fit the mould of an attractive woman. For that reason we must take our hats off to Ed. He takes all of them on with equal gusto, regardless how unattractive. In the end a woman is a woman, and each one is another notch to his very long belt. And even though he is paying them, he shows his appreciation with an affectionate hug or kiss after they make love.
Of all the on screen encounters, perhaps most personally satisfying for him is when he gets to try forbidden fruit. Many women are either married or in relationships. That is an exciting prospect, but the feeling is further magnified when the husband / boyfriend is present. In some scenes the partner is there watching the moment unfold. One can only imagine the intense satisfaction Ed must feel when having sex with a woman in front of her partner. What makes it even more satisfying is the post-sex discussions. The women admit they enjoyed it very much and had orgasms, sometimes more than one. They even discuss the thrill of having sex with another man in front their partner and love the fact they get to fulfil this fantasy without actually cheating. It's like having your cake and eating it too; cheating without really cheating. The best part is everything was captured on camera, so they can relive the moment over and over, and also share with the rest of the world.
In relation to this specific film, nothing has changed. He uses the same formulate; get a girl in, conduct interview, have sex, then post interview. There is not much more. The only difference with this video is he gets to try the delectable Jaimee Foxworth. Those old enough will remember her from the TV series Family Matters. While the scene with her is far from amazing, it is special because she is in it. Ed shows how much he treasures their on screen encounter by promoting it on his webpage. He is clearly proud to have added her to his notch.
At the end of the day Ed's accomplishment is a victory for your average looking guy who otherwise has no hope with women. The fact he has made a career out of this is living proof that any guy can have sex with beautiful women who are out of their league on camera. As it currently stands he has documented sexual encounters with 1,880 women. That number will continue to increase every day, which makes him one of the world's biggest overachievers.
Hercules Reborn (2014)
A terrible addition to the Hercules mythology
I accidentally stumbled on this film while searching for the other one with The Rock, believing it was the same one. I was wrong and would end up being subjected to 90 minutes of pretty much nothing.
This film is titled Hercules Reborn, but has very little to do with him. His story is only a side plot and he has very little screen time. It is about Arius and his quest to bring down the guy who kidnaps his girlfriend, Princess Theodora and has taken over the kingdom.
Too many things annoyed me about this film, but I will go into only a few. Firstly the general (can't remember his name) was a complete and total loser. There was no reason anyone would follow him, yet they did without question, even going against their own moral compass to carry out his order. It seemed way too scripted.
Secondly when they do find Hercules, he is just some alcoholic who does not even appear to have superhuman strength. Then later on we learn he has ties to the evil general, which pretty much comes out of left field WTF??? Talk about poor writing.
I won't mention everything else that is wrong with this film, as there is just too much. This is simply terrible cinema and only watch it if you feel like torturing yourself.
Sizzling Suburbia (1985)
Simply Sizzles
This is not one of Traci's best, but one of my favorites.
*Spoiler Alert*
The film starts with Mike (Peter North) having sex with his wife Vicky (Cara Lott). She is an average looker, but has a decent enough body, and they do a fairly good scene together. Following that they have a quick chat. Mike is apparently unhappy about Vicky's sister Sandy staying with them.
Next we see them having breakfast. Here we are introduced to Vicky's sister (Pamela Jennings). While Vicky is talking Sandy continues to flirt with Mike. Now for someone who is not happy about her staying, Mike cannot help but peak over the newspaper he is reading and fantasizing about Sandy. The breakfast quickly winds up and we see Sandy heading upstairs. She sees Mile coming and stops to give him the opportunity to peak up her skirt as she ascends.
Now alone we see Vicky in her room folding clothes and doing the laundry. While in the midst of it she inadvertently discovers signs of Mike infidelity. She calls her friend Karen (Sheri St Claire) and has a chat about what to do. She says she will come over and has a chat to her. Vicky then pushes away the laundry basket in a fit of rage.
We then see the scene the box cover scene. Mike is sitting in bed in his business clothes with his rich client Helen Trent (Traci Lords). She is dressed scantily in very revealing lingerie which barely covers anything. The two have a quick chat before getting down to business. The two show great chemistry. There is a lot of kissing, foreplay, and general affection. She rides him all the way to climaxing.
The next part sees Vicky being visited by Karen, who suggests she have her own affair to make up for it. She is disgusted by the idea and storms out, heading to the pool. We then see her friend Tony (Ken Starbuck) enter the room. Karen tells him to go after Vicky, which he does.
The film then cuts back to our two titular characters Mike & Helen. We see them in missionary and Mike going hard trying to satisfy her. You must admire this man's stamina as he has already climaxed once, and has to do it again. This time he shoots all over her mouth and face, to put an end their fiery encounter.
Next we see Vicky go for a swim in the backyard pool. After getting out to sun bath we see Tony go out and join her. He starts to tease her, and although she shows some resistance, it does not last very long. In a few minutes they are having sex by the pool. He climaxes there, but she cannot get enough, so they move indoors for more fun.
While this is happening we see Jerry (Francois Papillion) the pool boy arrive to clean the pool. Sandy sees him outside and goes there to seduce him. She is wearing a tight crop top and string bikini. Although not much of a looker, she has a great body with large alluring breasts and an equally delicious backside. Her outfit suits her, further highlighting her best assets. Her clothes come off as the romp begins. Mike returns and watches her through the house window.
After that we see Sandy taking a shower. Mike comes in and offers a towel. He then reveals that he watched her and can satisfy her more than the pool boy. They start flirting before getting down to business. We see Mike's words were not some idle boast. Sandy gets much more pleasure from this encounter, due to Mike being better endowed and more experienced that the pool boy.
Next we see Vicky continuing her romp with Tony. Karen comes in to join, so it quickly becomes a threesome. He pays attention to both women and they get the best out of him, resulting in him reaching a second climax for the day.
The film resumes the next morning, with Mike, Vicky, and Sandy sitting at the table. They chat like nothing has happened, while Sandy suggests inviting a few friends (Karen & Tony) over. He agrees and they just chat, as it fades out.
We then get to the ending, and see Muffy (Marguerite Nuit) reading a manuscript for a story to Sandy, who is her auntie. We then realize the voice that had been narrating was Muffy all along, and the novel was written by her auntie. It is hinted that the story is based on her experience.
After watching the film, you cannot help but feel envious of how lucky the men in adult entertainment can be. Peter North got to have sex with 3 women in this one film. Yes, they are actors and paid to do a "job" but that does not change the fact the sex is real. Better yet every intricate detail of the encounters was captured on film. The best part was one of the women was Traci Lords. The new co-stars who now work with her only get to act alongside her, and any sex scenes are simulated. Peter on the other hand got to have real no-strings-attached sex in the rawest form with no protection (skin to skin bareback), and she was underage at the time. Their intimate moments were captured on camera for posterity so no one, not even she, can dispute the occurrence. That is certainly something to be very proud of, and I am sure many of her mainstream co-stars are jealous of.
Overall I found this film very enjoyable, but my opinion is biased as I am fan of both Peter and Traci. To see them in the same scene at their most revealing doing their best to pleasure each other is always great. I cannot recommend this enough.
When a Stranger Calls (2006)
The Super-Stranger
I just saw this film the other night for the second time. The first time I watched was over 5 years ago. I remember it not being very good, so I wanted to see and confirm if this was the case. It was.
*****Spoiler Alert******
The film starts off with the baby sitter arriving at the rich peoples houses (I can't be bothered mentioning names) and it goes downhill from there. We do not even see the children until near the end, and the killer; he is super-human, until he gets to the babysitter. Anyway most people have already discussed the story and acting, so I will just get onto what annoyed me most.
The house uses a secure alarm system that requires a code for entry. This was activated while the Dr was at home, so how did the killer get inside to kill the Rosa the maid??? And how did he do it so cleanly without being noticed?
Then we have her friend, Tiffany, enter the house and surprise her, via an open garage door that connects to the house WTF??? I am sure the alarm system is advanced enough to tell us if one of the main entrances is open.
Worst still, when Tiffany leaves the house and gets into her car it suddenly won't start WTF??? She's got a Toyota, the same model I had, and I never had issues starting it. Anyway, there is a branch blocking the entrance, so she has to get out of her car. Then she gets hunted by the killer who moves at super speed, so she never sees it coming. After this the film gets even stupider, if that was even possible.
So our babysitter sees the guest house light come on, and decides to leave the relative safety of the main house, go through the creepy forest which has a magical wind blowing through it, to the said house. WTF??? Why would she even want to do this? She was a scared teenager a few seconds ago, and now she's going Rambo???
Needless to say she returns to the house, and the killer is there. Now how did he go from the guest house to the main house completely undetected and enter without the alarm code? More importantly the house is absolutely massive. How did he know all the rooms and locations so well? Did he have psychic powers or study the mansion plans prior to this attack? Obviously that would have been impossible, as there was no way he could be anticipating a babysitter would be there alone.
Anyway, I won't waste any more time here. I give it a 2 star only for production value. The rest is simply not worth it, and I will not be watching it a third time. Avoid if you can.
Battlefield Earth (2000)
A terrible film, based off a book that is not much better.
I am ashamed to admit I watched this film 3 times. The first time was upon its release at the cinema. I walked out thinking, "WTF? What did I watch?"
The second time was 2 years later, to confirm if it really was that bad. It was! The third time was to show a friend going through film school how "not to make" a film.
Now after seeing it that many times I can honestly NOT recommend it to anyone, unless they want 2 hours of pure torture. Of course almost everyone who has ever watched a film will be aware of this, since it has become universally known as a bad movie. As such it can be used for educational purposes; to show people how NOT to make a film.
Anyway, I will not go into too much detail as there are enough reviews here highlighting just how terrible this film is and the many plot holes. I will only add that all the negative reviews are true, but then the book is no better either. Essentially it is a bad film based on an equally bad story.
Blindness (2008)
Was better when I fast forwarded
Okay, I admit it. I watched this movie twice, but only because I had read the book. The first time watched it I just switch on the subtitles and played the movie at x4 speed, as I can read fairly fast. Even then it was slow and boring, but for some reason I felt I had missed something and did not get the full effect of the film. So I watched it a second time with a friend, at normal speed, and I realised what I missed was a torturous 2 hours where I could have been doing something else. The film was simply terrible. At least at x4 speed it is over in 30 minutes, but at 2 hours the agony is simply prolonged.
I wished I had read the reviews here first. I might have avoided this train wreck. The sad part is it is not that much different from the book, which I always had an issue with. I felt it was written from one man's very limited perspective on humanity and his complete lack of understanding of actual blindness. Blind people do not behave like retarded farm animals, and a caring wife would not so easily allow herself to get raped for food. It just goes to show the writers imagination is quite limited, if he thinks people behave in such a way. It also shows he has little life experience, which is strongly reflected in the film.
Simply put; this film is neither realistic nor is anything in it believable. Things happen very randomly and the characters are simply cardboard cutouts. I would avoid this film at all costs, unless you enjoy 2 hours of torture. If you insist on watching it, maybe do what I did the first time and play it at x4 speed. It is actually bearable that way.
Au Pair, Kansas (2011)
Warm & Fun
I managed to catch this movie on Netflix. While flicking through the selection catalogue, a still of Traci Lords popped up. I recognised her straight away, and knew I had to watch it. Now before I continue I have to say I am a massive Traci Lords fan. I have followed her from her rise as the biggest name in the adult film industry to her re-birth as a legitimate actress. This may be the reason I have a bias towards her.
In any case, I have also gone through all of the reviews, both negative and positive. Since others have covered everything here in great detail, I will just add briefly to it and say I also enjoyed the film. It was a feel good movie that ultimately succeeded. There were parts in it that did not seem realistic, but it did not take away from the overall experience. Traci looked as beautiful as ever, and it is great to see how well her career as an actress has progressed throughout the year. I would recommend this.