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Reviews
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
Firstly, I would like to say, What the hell is wrong with all of you people.
I was going to give 8 stars but with only 21 one stars and 478 TEN star,243 nine star and 128 EIGHT star ratings I decided nothing is wrong with US people and gave it a 9.
Maybe that one star reviewer who posted that quote needs a little TLC from Nurse Ratched. I loved this movie in 1975 because my Daddy griped for days "Only guy with my last name that's famous and he's crazy as hell." Daddy was also a You People type of guy who was always right.
Every movie Uncle Jack was in he seriously seems very close to needing a rubber room but still a great actor. Maybe this movie was a premonition of Jack's future career.
In the Heat of the Night: Gunshot (1989)
Same stuff different day.
When did Cops start apologizing for not being murdered??Almost every modern show blames the Cop for not standing there and getting killed. Not much of a choice since murdering a Cop gets years on death row or life in prison so what would be gained ??
Virgil takes his turn screaming at his fellow officers,I guess to give Bubba a break. All is well since later everybody will forget how they were abused and be BFFs again. Good thing since Parker and Sweet also got to be mad at everybody which is a poor plot because the 'FRIEND' they defend is always the guilty party.
Night Court (1984)
Never give up...
If Mel Torme can succeed as a 'singer' anyone can achieve their wildest dreams. It could have been a funny show if Harry ever shut up but long boring lectures were his big thing.
Why they thought Christine was comedy material is a mystery. Maybe if she had Larry Linville's talent she could have copied Frank Burns dime dropping better than thou persona..IF.
With today's politics I guess stabbing Dan in the back while being friends to his face just isn't as funny as it used to be. But overall the DVD series is watchable and often entertaining with a bit of fast forwarding at times.
Mars Attacks! (1996)
Finally the truth....
Growing up with the weekly shoot-em-ups like Gunsmoke,Bonanza and countless others lacked much drama or reality. Golly Gee the star is in a showdown,falling off a cliff in a stagecoach,Tarzan facing a lion......are you on the edge of your seat during the commercial??Will they survive?? Obviously since they just showed you a preview of next week's episode of course they did.
For that reason Mars Attacks was worth watching. EVERYBODY is killed from walk on extras to mega-stars whose stunt doubles have stunt doubles.
One bad feature is that the yodelling almost makes the audiences heads explode. Altogether a funny mindless movie. For the 1 star review that asked What is the point of this movie? THERE IS NONE. If you need a point to everything this is definitely not your best choice.
Lethal Weapon 3 (1992)
Who put the gun in that gang members hand??
Why you Mother of the Year candidate YOUR SON PUT IT THERE. Too much PC for Roger to scream YOUR BOY TRIED TO MURDER ME LADY!!!!!!.....but he should have.
At least he didn't apologise for being a cop like they did in LW 4----Gee we're sorry America has immigration laws so we won't enforce them. Y'all come on in.
Definitely a series that should have ended with 2.
Back to the Future Part III (1990)
Back to reality screen writers......
I had a 3 gallon 2" stainless steel tower still as a hobby. Ran many gallons of 70 to 87% moonshine as a hobby. I once triple distilled a batch to 92% and cut grass for as long as the quart lasted .My riding mower ran fine so why couldn't a scientist like Doc distill enough alcohol to get the Time Machine up to 88 MPH??
But despite some lapses in logic like actual gunfights being very rare in the "Wild West" but snakes,bears,wild boars and other dangerous things were plentiful so most non-violent folks carried guns Part 3 is still the best of the trilogy.
They say there's always one sequel too many and it was Part 2 of BTTF.
In the Heat of the Night: Hot Nights (1988)
Same ol' S...err STUFF,Different Day.
Once again Bubba is a hard headed blowhard who listens to nobody and curses those trying to help him. Good ol' boys might overlook such treatment but don't ever think they'll forget it.
Once again Bubba finds TRUE LOVE but she goes to prison. His other romantic flames usually wind up dead. Almost as predictable as any woman Parker knew in school who is now a hooker or druggie. Same as Jamison's girls......all drug addicts. Weren't there any nice girls in Sparta????
Don't be looking for Bubba to apologise to those he verbally abused.....never happened.
Branded (1965)
Wow swords can break??
I barely remember this show except for the song and breaking the sword. After many episodes of 'Forged in Fire' it's obvious that swords can be snapped.
The sad part of Branded is that back then a coward was pretty well unable to live a decent life. In the modern era he'd be elected President.
In the Heat of the Night: Don't Look Back: Part 1 (1988)
Same old Parker
Parker loves 'little girls' so much he destroys evidence and ruins crime scenes. Maybe he'll use his compassion to tell the next murdered girl's family why they can't catch the killer??
Overhaulin' (2004)
Gee how original....
Tried to watch an episode and was underwhelmed by the quintessential hootchie mama who never gets dirty. And that looking at the clock every 2 minutes........it's been done to death. A professional business doesn't have customers coming in the door while they frantically try to finish the job. Gee DANNY hurry things up.....or is it Rick Dale..........or Ian Russell building for a car show that starts in 5 minutes??????
No thanks.
A Painted House (2003)
Sort of a shotgun style of directing.
Reminds me of Jerry Clower's famous "Well shoot up here amongst us..One of us got to have some relief." They're kind hearted bigots who flip-flop so often you'll identify with some part of their ways. Luke is all over the map with his lying about a cold blooded murder of a white trash neighbor then he lies again when Cowboy has to kill the same murderer in self-defense. Seems his moral teachings are based on skin color and social status.
And from the first second she appears Luke and Tilly have a very weird sexual undertone going on. He's a farmer...how curious could he be??? Then we have ol' Can't Get Right with his mysterious affliction that prevents him from even lying under the cotton wagon instead of taking away a pair of hands to watch him. Only he is walking to town buying paint and painting a house so neatly nobody sees paint spatter on his clothes and says 'That ol' boy there is painting our house.'
Let's not forget the Uncle who knocked up the sharecropper's daughter has a family who is way above such people as sharecroppers and Siscos. They are all fine 'Christians' of the old Plantation morals. Why Massah Chandler what y'all doing in those slave cabins at night???
Actually slaves usually got Sundays off but when the cotton was being picked it was in the fields before daylight until after dark and you ate in the fields 7 days a week. Be a darn shame if you wasted 2 hours a day going to the house for dinner and half of Saturday and all of Sunday doing nothing. It might rain and you'll lose a lot of cotton that should have been picked.
Night Court: Wheels of Justice: Part 2 (1985)
Keep on Wheelin'
Off the set and out the door. Whoever wrote the Wheelers into Night Court should be banned from TV and movies. Or as is the trend in 2022 maybe the Wheelers could be elected to Congress.
Night Court: Walk, Don't Wheel (1985)
Lord spare us........
From the perfect family. It's not entertaining and is actually ridiculous. For some reason every sitcom has tried this idea but none have made it work.
FantomWorks (2013)
Watchable show......
...if it's a good episode. If not why bother??Why are prices never mentioned on any show except American Restoration?? Obviously just to pull a number out of the air with 3 or 4 workers on a job the daily nut would be a minimum of $1000.00. So the 41 panel truck and 41 Harley that shot out old Hippie brought in were in shop for 200 days and you're looking at $400,000.00???? Ever heard of Mecum or Barrett-Jackson auctions??
Still it's refreshing to actually see some work being done instead of Horny Mike and the idiot Rollo playing with tricycles and wasting time.
In the Heat of the Night: Poor Relations (1994)
Is stupid and rude REALLY funny?
Maybe in 1994 they had a shortage of Look how dumb we can be but it's 2022. If anything about Roy or his trailer park wife fills a need you have just tune in C-Span and watch Congress do nothing.
Rustlers' Rhapsody (1985)
Hard to remember 1985 in America
Forget that blurb about this being a 'MODERN' Western movie spoof. It's 37 years old and made at the very end of America's morals and decency. If you want to see a 'MODERN' Western that depicts 2022 go no farther than "A Million Ways to Die in the West".
Rustler'Rhapsody was missing instant meaningless sex between the Hero and both female stars,some steamy scenes at the camp between said females and gee you can tie 2 horses side by side and they just stand there?
Also missing was the quintessential use of the old 'F Bomb' in every sentence...sometimes twice. There were some funny scenes where the 'Good Guys' argued over still being good no matter what they had done. Now that fit right in with today's politics.
Since none of the old Singing Cowboy TV shows are shown as reruns now not many really know about them. Some folks liked them but if Matt Dillon had ever said 'SAM hold a gun on these rascals while me and Kitty play the guitar and sing a duet with Festus on the piano' Gunsmoke would have lasted 1 season.
Rhapsody is quite funny in it's own way and worth watching. If only they'd ridden off set into the sunset and hopped on some 4 wheelers in a Blazin Saddles type exit.
Dirty Mary Crazy Larry (1974)
What's in a name??
Movie roles even if you can't act. The best memory I have of the first time I watched Dirty Mary in the base theater at Ft. Benning,Georgia was when they apparent got away the audience was astounded. Cries of WHAT the crooks got away?? They're going to get away with everything??
What a wonderful ending to a movie. If only America still had ethics and people who respect the laws we used to live by.
The Twilight Zone: Execution (1960)
Not exactly Back to the Future.
So how do you grab a guy in Montana with a 'Time Machine' that never leaves New York?? And since it was located in a skyscraper how did it trap Caswell who was at ground level ? From H. G. Wells Time Machine to Doc Brown's Time DeLorean it's common sense you'll end up where you left from and be inside the machine.
And a burglar playing with the dials just happened to reset them to the exact second in the past?
Wagon Train: The Benjamin Burns Story (1960)
Good watching
If I was stranded in the desert with no water or food I'd eat a stray rattlesnake. Good thing they stayed quiet and hid from the Indians but since Indians need water they'd have been waiting at the water hole anyway. Seems like the writers overlook some rather obvious things.
The Beverly Hillbillies (1962)
Jed the 'generous' Hillbilly
Who gave away thousands to strangers like the con artist Jed Clampett and others. But he kept Pearl's truck for years with not a penny of rent. At least he could have bought her a new car. Such things gave a true meaning to 'They's kin so we got to treat them different.
Blacula (1972)
Something different at last.
Before ALL horror movies had a bunch of people lost who find a quintessential run down mansion,enter without permission,agree to stay inside while the best shaped girl gets nekkid in the shower and jumps out to find......everybody has gone outside leaving her alone they actually tried to follow a plot.
No other film has ever startled me like digging up Blacula's coffin did. I was not expecting what came next.
Ed McBain's 87th Precinct: Heatwave (1997)
So Bert Gummer is rather crooked.
I guess you could falsify reports but with Andy Parker working there it won't be long before Lt. Burns is at least transferred. Kling is the kind of cop that gives all cops a bad name. Not sure why Carella has that weird whisper but it was rather creepy,This movie needed Roger Havilland or Fat Ollie to smack Kling upside his head and help Mayer do his job. As always the quintessential Teddy was the center of action.
Seems like a Detective would just follow Teddy and wait for the bad guy to show up.
Lonesome Dove (1989)
Poor directing
What a tribute to the fact that stupid actions bring poor results. Haven't seen Jake in years,he hasn't been in Montana in years but old fuss budget Woodrow who doubts everybody and everything he works with everyday wants to be the first guy to take a cow to Montana. Even Jake mentions how impulsive and stupid that idea is.
Lorries brain dead selfishness starts with her ignoring the truth that Jake is an abusive user. Gus gives her 2 months salary for a cowboy for a poke but she can't go to town and get a stagecoach to San Francisco. She's too good to be around the cowhands who have bought her body for months so Blue Duck grabs her.
July can't hold a coherent thought or do his job so he takes off after his useless 'wife' and gets Roscoe and Joe killed. Janey doesn't count since she was nursing Roscoe along and could have fled Ol' Sam any time without the burden of helping him.
And the touching scenes of Clara and Gus acting like two dogs in heat in front of young girls was a bit much. No surprise she later ridicules Call for keeping a promise and honoring his word. What a testament to a man who built her a fine ranch and left her wealthy......bury her Friend With Benefits beside the guy. Maybe Gus actually had a few ethics before he died although he was pawing Clara on Bob's death bed.
Not the least of failures was a weird coincidence that Ricky Schroeder and Robert Ullrich bear an uncanny resemblance in real life but Call was Newts daddy of all the customers Maggie serviced. At least Newt got a watch for months of hard labor driving cows. Lorrie got half the herd doing nothing she hadn't been doing for $2.00 from Gus who did almost no work.
In the Heat of the Night: Child's Play (1993)
Not a good example for kids
When did people lose their rights to privacy?? Funny how fast those who say not wanting trespassers is mean will change to suing Arlo if a kid gets hurt on his property. Funny SAD.....not funny haha.
Life of Crime (2013)
Good mindless entertainment
If Mickey really got out from under the thumb why didn't she divorce fat pompous Frank taking half of everything and then reporting his illegal earnings to the IRS to get the whistle blowers reward and take the other half for alimony and child support when Frank went to prison??
I doubt seriously that Frank gave up any ransom at all for Melanie and getting her away from him was doing Frank a giant favor.
Political Correctness must have prevented the development of a "Married With Children" version of Gee Mickey if we divorce who gets stuck with the obnoxious kid theme.