hydearchie Reviews

Glamorous (2023)

Boring and badly acted

[1/10 · 25 June 2023]

I loved Ugly Betty and the Devil Wears Prada as well as all the other famous fish out of water fun fluffy comedy dramas centered around magazines, fashion and beauty. I did not love, or even like, this. In fact, I had to give up it is so bad. Badly written and badly acted. It feels like a low budget hallmark version of the genre.

The biggest crime is that Kim Cattrall is chose to do it - she is much better than this borefest.

The next and nearly as great problem is that the main actor cannot. I don't know if he was cast off tiktok, but ha has the same artificial exagerated delivery whether he is doing the character's content or filling the water cooler. His caharcter is hackneyed and old fashioned and he is uncomfortable to watch.

Watch a shame.

Suspicion (2022)

Good start and then down a rabbit hole

[3/10 · 29 March 2022]

I wanted to like this. The first three episodes are good, but then it goes off the rails ambling nonsensically until , in the final episode, it falls into a cauldron of ideological clichés.

I cannot reccommend you NOT to watch this series more (or less?). Unless you are a fantatical climate alarmist, you will wonder what on earth the point of it all was.

Bel-Air (2022– )

Could be great, but ruined by politics and ideology.

[4/10 · 27 March 2022]

Good acting. The Will actor is amazing, but the whole cast is excellent too.

Could be great, but ruined by politics and ideology.

Feels like a lecture per episode.

Shame - I wanted to love it.

Cheaper by the Dozen (2022)

Awful, joyless, lame

[1/10 · 19 March 2022]

It is impossible to express all the ways this movie is dreadful. Here are the lowlights.

It has none of the charm or humour of the orginals.

It is so woke and nihilistic, it is as far removed from reality as the imagined world it is trying to critique.

Some movies should not be social commentaries - this is one of them.

Union cannot act and nor can some of the kids.

It is depressing.

The Outlaws (2021– )

If not for the ridiculous race stuff it would have been a solid 8

[5/10 · 4 December 2021]

Fun, light storyline. Great cast and witty script. Sadly Merchant's time in LA and summer 2020 injected a racial theme that is outdated and dishonest. It is a good example of activism in entertainment - and enough to ensure I never sit through another Merhant production if it is threaded as intellectually dishonestly again.

Shrill (2019–2021)

Off the cliff of Woke

[3/10 · 22 May 2021]

I enjoyed the first two series despite the very woke moralising tone of the script. The characters were likeable and the new puritanism (yes, I mean that word) was an interesting twist.

The problem comes in series 3, which is a victim (like much of US pop culture), of mean spirited ideological evangelism, whcih undermines both some stories and characters.

If the moral certitude was removed, this would be a much superior show.

Ma Rainey's Black Bottom (2020)

Not the sum of its parts.

[4/10 · 20 December 2020]

Great actors and good source material in the play. Sadly, this film falls flat despite the really good performances. The problem is common to lots of films made from plays. In theatre everything is written to be contained to the stage and in the audience's imagination; in movies the more expansive the view the better so it feel cheap and affected when it's filmed like a 80s multi camera sitcom. I wish they had taken Ma Rainey's story and told it on a much larger scale, which the format would have allowed. This could have been done within the relationships of the same characters and taken inspiration from the play with great impact, but trying to transpose the action so literally is a fail for narrative.

Castaways (2018)

Wins you over

[7/10 · 19 September 2018]

I thought I hated this show for the first few episodes. It felt contrived and unnatural. The format was different from other survival shows and the reading of the diaries felt distracting. However, I still wanted to know how it ended and as the series went along the device of people's inner most thoughts narrating events made more sense. If there is a second series, there needs to be less 'at home' and more of the action. But, over all it was, dare I say it, quite thought provoking and I'm glad to have watched it and interested to know what happened to them afterwards.

I Feel Pretty (2018)

Abysmal

[1/10 · 4 September 2018]

This film did not make any sense. There were so many ways this clanger could have been fixed, but equally too many to list where it went wrong. The main problem was how on earth she was not arrested or committed - it took suspension of disbelief too far. A central issue was that rather than wake up from the head injury feeling beautiful, she actually woke up with delusions of grandeur. Rather than teach how confidence improves outcomes, it suggested arrogance does. No moral lessons was taught or learned and even the attempt to shoehorn one in at the end was a big fail. My main gripe is that I paid £9.99 on Amazon to watch it - and I really want a refund and the last two hours back!!!

Who Is America? (2018)

Not quite Ali G - sadly

[6/10 · 30 July 2018]

I am a fan of Baron Cohen; I loved loved Ali G, loved Borat, liked Bruno and enjoyed some of the movies he has been in. There are some very funny moments in this series, but too many flat and nasty ones too. My main complaint is the singularity of perspective; even the far-left character is really just a foil to try and 'expose' conservatives. I wish there was a balance to the mockery, which would make it feel cleverer and less like partisan political trolling. As it is, the show has mined a few retired Republicans and a bunch of weird paranoid right-wingers to paint a cliched picture of Trump's America, which ignores the facistic tendancies and behaviour of the far-left too. Three episodes in - I will amend the review if it does start to even out...

The Break with Michelle Wolf (2018)

No politics on Netflix - please.

[2/10 · 2 July 2018]

There are so few places for pure entertainment. Netflix should rise above the fray or choose to be truly diverse. Jokes are not funny if you know what is coming - and Wolf is too predictable. I wish Netflix would just pick people that can craft a great joke regardless of their privates!

The Alienist (2018–2020)

I would give it a nearly perfect...

[8/10 · 28 April 2018]

I would give The Alienist a nearly nine...but, this fabulous looking and well acted period crime drama is sometimes undermined by the odd ubiquitous reference to contemporary concepts such as privilege and immigration. Modern audiences do not need to be patronised by having historical parallels spelled out to them or modern social concepts transposed. Accuracy is is the best educator if there are observations to be made. It is a small gripe though - I thoroughly enjoyed this series and highly recommend it to period and crime drama fans.

Dirty Dancing (2017 TV Movie)

I wish there was a way to give a negative rating

[1/10 · 21 April 2018]

This is an affront to movies, my eyes and most of all the origanal movie. Why, why, why was it made? It is like watching a bad high school musical. Except, that would be more fun because it is your friends or kid you are watching There are too many awful things to enumerate about this 'film' But it was doomed from the start by weird casting. I love Abigail Breslin, but she does not pull off Baby (and Jennifer Grey was not as good an actress) and what is with a middle age Patrick wannabe? I realise it is sort of a satire, but it is not funny or clever just a bad pastiche! I'm off to search for eyedrops now.

Roseanne (1988–2018)

Nostalgia & Potential

[9/10 · 28 March 2018]

I did not see this reboot working, but was very happily surprised. I really enjoyed the first 2 episodes. I watched this Roseanna as a kid in New Zealand and loved it, as a grown up in the UK it again has universal appeal. I know it is the white working class midwestern trope that distinguishes it in the US, but it was a big hit around the world and I think people will really enjoy this iteration too. Reading the reviews, I see some do not like the traditional views of Dan and others complain about the cross dressing grandson and progressive Jacqui. I think this is exactly what makes it relevant and interesting - and maybe an exercise in all sides learning to laugh at themselves.

Collateral (2018)

Unfathomably bad

[3/10 · 7 March 2018]

How did nobody notice this story was so weak. I can hardly believe I made it through all 4 episodes. The first episode and amazing cast promised a complex exploration of collateral damage, but all we got in the next three is a naval gazing and oddly sanctimonious lecture on how awful we are. I would highly not recommend if you are looking to be entertained!

Seven Seconds (2018)

OK Crime Drama

[6/10 · 5 March 2018]

This was an ok series with many excellent performances. The premise is interesting and timely, but it plays so much to simplistic (and racist) stereotypes that it makes it more political than valuable commentary. The flaw is in assuming all viewers 'know' that most white police are racists rather than exploring the notions of 'bad eggs', brotherhood or colour blind corruption, which would have elevated the story significantly. It is also far too long and convoluted (rather than cleverly complex) to be truly entertaining; 4-6 episodes would have given it more tension. I stuck with Seven Seconds out of a sense of duty (and because of the great acting) rather than because I was gripped.

Underground (2016–2017)

Good and Bad makes average

[6/10 · 6 February 2018]

The premise is great. The underground railway, the people that escaped slavery and those that helped and hindered them. This is an era and perspective little explored on tv. Unfortunately, it is treated too much like a teen drama (even some of the cast is familiar as such). Over loud and nonsensical music choices have you reaching for the volume every few minutes. It is sanitised and silly rather than gritty and engaging. The shame is that tv drama is many people's only exposure to history - and this is not teaching the viewer anything. It is moderately entertaining though and well acted for the most part - just watch with the sound down!

The Last Tycoon (2016–2017)

Utterly entertaining - Series 2 PLEASE!

[10/10 · 8 January 2018]

I have thoroughly enjoyed the duly lavish and marvellous The Last Tycoon so I am bewildered and extremely dissapointed at the news a second series has not been commissioned. TLT is a high quality, well crafted and well acted show based on superlative source material both literary and actual. Hollywood's heyday is a much untapped source for an ongoing drama (especially in tv) and TLT brilliantly and vividly evokes the era. I sincerely hope Amazon will rethink its decision before it's too late. There is much to be said for timeless, enduring quality programming as opposed to yet another pastiche of blockbuster Game of Thrones as is the rumoured plan.

The Long Road Home (2017)

Like a protracted day time special.

[2/10 · 13 November 2017]

This was heavily marketed and I was very interested to watch it based on the cast and subject matter. However, The Long Road Home is dreadful on every level. The script is tortured (a weak narrative and asinine dialogue); the production quality poor and the performances stilted or soap opera-ish (I am sure due to the awful script). This was a missed opportunity for another perspective on recent history, though I think the source material was probably largely to blame - the book was apparently so badly written I was advised not to read it by a number of people. Overall, it felt like watching an interminable daytime drama and I had to give up shortly in to episode 3!

The State (2017– )

Sanitised and superficial

[1/10 · 21 August 2017]

Undoubtedly, one of the worst TV programmes I have watched in recent times. It is a sanitised and superficial portrayal of 'innocent' young people travelling to the so-called caliphate to fulfill their religious destiny in 2015 (a time when Daesh's atrocities were already known)! There are no back stories, which if accurate would have portrayed the protagonists as consuming violent rhetoric, promises of sexual fulfillment and horrifying videos online as part of their radicalisation before going to Syria to commit, support or facilitate war crimes. We are supposed to believe that inherently decent people would choose to follow a brother to 'martyrdom', to run away from home to marry a random assassin, or to offer medical services to people that brutalise civilians. We are supposed to believe that all the characters were unaware of how violent and cruel IS was going to be, which is an insult to us as viewers, but also to the victims of this death cult. The absurdity peaks in one grotesque storyline where an isis fighter, in order to protect her, buys a Yazidi woman who's husband has disappeared, who's small daughter has been raped and who herself has been raped and tortured by multiple men. She is won over by his 'goodness' and later seduces him in gratitude! The failure of this drama to 'own' the presumptive repulsiveness of the characters' decisions to go to Syria is too great a hurdle and no amount of light portrayals of isis violence later in the series makes up for such a gaping omission or the distortion it creates.

Meet the Trumps: From Immigrant to President (2017 TV Movie)

I am no Trump fan, but this is a thinly veiled hatchet job.

[1/10 · 19 April 2017]

I was sincerely interested to learn more about Trump's background. Sadly, this was predictably hysterical in places and misleading in others. There was a place for his father's exploitation of commercial opportunities and accusations of racially profiling tenants, but when he was not found to have broken the law there is a limit to what can be extrapolated, let alone about the son(when by accounts he was expressly against the practice). There might even be a place for Trump's belief he inherited special qualities, but to leave the unsubtle whiff of something menacing is unjustified, particularly as it was connected to his brother, whom he has been nothing but admiring of. It is important to hear from his critics, but when there are no admirers it is impossible to take the investigation seriously. I hoped for more and I think there is more to understand, but it will need to be explored by someone smarter and more objective that Frei, who is relentless in his pursuit of affirming his own bias.

Dirty Girl (2010)

1987?

[1/10 · 8 September 2016]

This could have been a witty period take on coming of age and finding your identity (a sort of Indi 'dirty' Pretty in Pink or Can't buy me love'), but I was distracted by the claim of a 1987 setting. The 1982 hair cuts and 1977 clothing made the production feel like it was run by a group of high school students without access to google! There was so much social, political and fashion change going on at the end of the 80s that failure to contextualise the story properly made this poorly written film feel flat and pointless as well as failing an otherwise great cast. Definitely, not one to recommend. I would go back to original films of the era for now, but also give some of the TV set in that era a go as well for new perspectives on the time.

Me Before You (2016)

An unfortunate tail

[1/10 · 1 July 2016]

I have never read the book so did not know the ending of this story (which I will not give away). I suggest however, that nobody watch this film without at least reading the synopsis so they know how it ends - it may change your mind about watching it in the first place or at least prepare you for one of the most tasteless endings in a film ever. The problem is that the movie is so sweet and monotoned that the depressing ending both assaults you and offends. It is not giving anything away to say that the male character is contemplating Dignatas' services. With no judgement whatsoever on this it is important to note that this is a compassionate organisation, but according to all media far from luxurious. The book may have dealt in detail with the realty of disability so deadly or degrading that the sufferer feels deeply they need release. However, this movie treats the illnesses associated with the male character's disability as intermittent blips in an otherwise improving quality of life. It leaves such a bitter taste in the mouth because the conclusion is that a valuable life must be expansive and in an able body! Being close to parents, loving unconditionally, life unexpected are failures. It is a shame as the performances are great - if the movie was a real romcom with a joyful ending or a serious drama with a tragic twist this story could have worked - unfortunately, it was neither; rather it was an amusing film that meandered off the side of a cliff with a thud...