Change Your Image
Straker17
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
The Hot Flashes (2013)
The Hot Flashes: Progressivism for Dummies
The Hot Flashes is certainly a film that has high intentions. Attempting to achieve a level of entertainment that both amuses and enlightens, the movie plows through it's runtime with stereotypes and underdeveloped characters. As a result, the movie appears more as progressive propaganda than anything else.
The film is not without several good shots at comedy and feel good entertainment, The cast has great chemistry with each other, something which greatly elevates the second half. The entire cast seems to be having an amusing time in the film. And there is good intent all around. However, the intent to provide audiences with a fresh, meaningful screenplay does not always translate to a success.
What we are given as audiences is a movie with so many missed opportunities. A film that celebrates middle aged women is long overdue. However, instead of receiving characters who excel despite the stigma surrounding them, the audience is given a bunch of characters who have to cheat, bribe, and manipulate their way to success. Even in the end scene, when it appears that we are going to see these women succeed based on their own skill and growth as characters, we see the other team phoning it in, and ignoring who was unabashedly their best player.
The main characters are horribly underdeveloped, and it often feels like the director forgot to tell someone to film these characters when huge moments happen. Clementine and Roxie go from hating to loving each other within two scenes. Florine, the most reluctant character shoots a ball once and decides to go all in on the basketball plan. And we never get to learn too much about the woman that brings these women together. What kind of person was she? We know she is great woman who ran a mobile mammogram company and she seemed to be someone who was well liked, but we learn precious few specifics about her life other than her name.
As if an underdeveloped lead cast is bad enough, all of the side characters give them a run for their money. Men are lazy bums who need to be taken care of and satisfied, lest they seek pleasure elsewhere. Religious people are hateful and hypocritical. Teenage girls are just always angry. And audiences are just supposed to be okay with all of this. There are almost no elements of the film that are treated with any kind of sensitivity, the most shocking of which was the lesbian plot line. The fact that one character has not come out of the closet is treated as a joke. Even the progressive characters of the movie simply see her as "that lesbian that everyone knows about but hasn't come out". And when she does come out, instead of rallying around her for support, they simply congratulate her on the nice piece of meat she managed to snag, I can just imagine what that plot line could've been if we had developed her partner more, if we developed her reluctance to come out more. And wouldn't it have been such a heartwarming moment to watch them have a genuine intimate moment, especially at the climax of the film.
Wouldn't it have been so great if these women rallied together, and used nothing but their own skills to achieve their goals? Wouldn't it have been so great if anything meaningful was discussed about religion? Wouldn't it have been great if we had a sensitive portrayal of a lesbian couple who aren't ready to be out in the open yet?
People who do not need a deep conversation about political beliefs will easily be able to write this movie off as an amusing film with a good message. But, others will find it hard to get past how underdeveloped the entire film is.
Inside (2016)
Oh my.
I won't sit here and give you the dramatics "worst film I've ever seen" or "a piece of trash", but I will tell you it is immensely bad. To give the film some credit, it does look nice, there are a few thrilling moments, and Laura Harring is incredible as the villain. However, that's about it. What we have here is a movie that is glossy, but shallow.
Our main character is played by Rachel Nichols, who is very uneven in her performance. There are moments I thought she was great, and others that I felt she didn't pull off. Her weaknesses are made more apparent by the stellar performance Harring gives. And, being honest, Harring is given a far more interesting character. The villain is a character that is selfish, psychotic, and violent, however, her actions at the end of the film show that there is still a glimpse of humanity in her. She is simply a very broken woman. Our main character briefly deals with grief in surface level fashion. You almost begin to root for the villain, because everything about her characterization and performance far outshines the protagonist's.
The supporting characters are utterly useless, and sometimes annoying. Issac is a likeable enough character, but remains utterly stupid, and never actually does anything to add any amount of tension to the film, and his partner is no different, only appearing on screen in a far away shot so we can see him get killed. Her mother, whom they stress is on her way, is only in the film for a few seconds, and also adds nothing to the film. And, we also have cops. One of which is a fine character, but isn't particularly interesting, and only drags the movie out further. The second cop mistakes our lead for the villain. And, even after she pleads that the real villain is upstairs, the cop forces her back upstairs in a truly idiotic move.
The main issue with this film is that there is positively no tension. The frantic banging on the bathroom door and the end climax in the swimming pool are somewhat tense, and their are a few cool thrills, but the movie absolutely lacks any kind of atmosphere. It is far too polished to offer any kind of visceral punch, and it fails as a glossy thriller through the use of comedy and a little bit too much stylization. It doesn't help that the film is entirely predictable. Every thrill or jump, or even plot twist can be called moments, or even minutes, before they happen. Had the film been entertaining or atmospheric, this would not have been an issue, but we've already discussed that.
And now, we get to the major elephant in the room. The film is a remake of a highly regarded French film. You only need to watch the first 30 minutes of the original to tell that it is far superior. With some truly effective moments, good performances, and a tense atmosphere, the film more than wipes the floor with this version. If you don't mind subtitles, the French film is a good watch. This version is half as effective and half as artistic and isn't worth a watch for any reason above curiosity. For fans of the original, it is an empty version of a better film, and for horror fans you have a relatively good looking home invasion film with little to offer.
The Final Destination (2009)
Truly The Worst In The Series. I Love It!
Four movies in, and now the creators have come up with another gimmick to get audience members to fill the seats. Final Destination is now in 3D. And now we're not only seeing another Final Destination film, we're seeing THE Final Destination. This very bold statement reins true in some ways. It is THE Final Destination to terrible Final Destination Movies. But, it is the sheer amount of trash present in this movie that makes it so much fun to watch.
This time around, we're introduced to some of the most bland characters that the series has to offer. Given absolutely no time to develop a deep sense of personality in any character, the film allows you to sit back and watch all of the carnage unfold. And while you certainly don't cheer for these characters deaths, you also feel no remorse. At least in that sense it improves the slightest bit over the third film. The acting is also nothing spectacular, but that just helps this achieve full trash level status.
The effects this time around are done with overwrought CGI that looks so fake the graphic depictions of gore are almost not even disgusting anymore. The death scenes are campy, resulting in an Evil Dead kind of feel to the violence. The difference is of course that Evil Dead did it on purpose. The deaths are even more brutal and gory in 3D, but that just adds a bit of fun to it.
The film is somehow weaker plot wise than any entry in the series so far. This is a statement I say in every review for these films, and somehow the horrid plotting still manages to shock me. But here, we get a second premonition sequence. NO, not like Wendy's train premonition that preludes their demise at the end of the 3rd movie. This premonition serves to be a fake out, making you think you are watching the last act of the movie, before you actually end up watching the last act.
The death scenes here are brilliantly and horribly over the top. It's hard to say if they are the worst or the best. Regardless it is incredibly entertaining. At 82 minutes this is the shortest film in the series without any close competition. This just adds to the amount of energy as the carnage is now coming at you at rapid fire paces. This eliminates any amount of tension that could be there, but it also ramps up the energy level.
I just have no idea how to approach this movie. To rate it base don actual quality would place it at a 2/10 maybe a generous 3/10. But the thing is, I am going to watch this move over and over again, because it almost feels like taking a shot of expresso or shooting your arm full of adrenaline. I completely, 100% enjoyed myself. This movie just wipes away any sense of professionalism I try to keep when I review a movie, even if it's just the internet. It's almost a disservice to my enjoyment of the film to rate it lower than a ten, even though it is a whole new level of bad. It almost reminds me of the 2004 Catwoman film starring Halle Berry. Another truly awful film so bad I can't help but enjoy myself entirely while I watch it.
Final Destination fans seem to be split on this movie. Fans of the series are going to get the most out of this one, but even they may not be able to get over this one's flaws. But, some people will come to it like me, and they will just enjoy the hell out of it. Watch this movie at your own risk.
Final Destination 3 (2006)
For the Fans
I said in my review of the second film that sequels usually work best when the original team is involved in the production. This film threatens to derail my argument. The third film in the series, it appears that they are running out of ideas with the plot, instead putting effort into the elaborate death scenes. The film operates in very similar fashion to the second entry in the series, although the film is more unlikeable due to several factors.
The characters are mostly detestable and vapid. Whereas the first film managed to make you root for the characters to avoid death, this film could almost make you cheer when the characters bite it. The sole black character of the movie is an absolute trainwreck of a person, cocky and aggressive, he proves to be the most satisfying victim of death. All of the other characters behave rudely to each other. It is infuriating to see how these characters have an utter lack of respect for each other. It is telling when the two most vapid characters of the whole movie end up being the nicest.
But these awful characters can't even be redeemed by good performances. While no performance is particularly bad, there aren't going to be many awards given out, with the exception of Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who gives a high caliber performance. She, in fact, proves to be one of the only redeeming quality of this movie. Otherwise, we're left with a pretty bland cast, who either overact or give relatively lifeless performances.
The movie is completely devoid of originality, which is one of the reasons why the original film worked so well. The second film, while convoluted at best, at least attempted to bring something new to the table. This film's big idea? Photos. And while, admittedly, it is cleverly executed, it dies not save the movie form being derivative and somehow emptier than the second film.
It is also entirely frustrating to yet again watch people discover deaths plan. The second film was smart enough to bring back a character who briefly explains the rules. Here, our characters are left to discover it on their own. And boy, do they take their sweet time doing it.
The biggest sin this movie commits is an utter lack of truly memorable and effective scenes. The roller coaster sequence fails in comparison to every other premonition in the series. The deaths are half as effective as the two previous films, as there is no taut feeling here. The tension present in the first two films is nowhere to be found here, and it's attempts at humor are pretty dull. The deaths prove to be little more than quick blood splatters, or drawn out burning. And they fail to make you feel any kind of sympathy.
Fans of the series will definitely find reasons to love this movie. Bolstered by Mary Elizabeth Winstead, it does manage to create some amount of energy, allowing it to escape boredom. And the deaths are creative enough to give the fans something to talk about, and allows them to get their money's worth, For most other viewers, however, the film is going to fall apart once you begin to criticize it.
If you are in the mood for a mindless horror film where you can let out the occasional whoop at the gory mayhem, this is one of the most perfect film you can find to watch. If you have any other purpose for watching this movie, you would be better off skipping it and finding something else.
Final Destination 2 (2003)
Somewhat Fun, but Can't Stand Up to the Original
After the sleeper hit that was the original Final Destination, the studio was obviously anxious to deliver a follow up. However, the original crew involved in the making of the first, could not return. As a result, we have a whole new cast and crew. This was also done with the second Nightmare on Elm Street movie. And while this is not quite as bad of a movie as that one, it does still prove that sometimes the best way to do a sequel is to bring back the original crew.
This new film ups the gore and humor of the original in an attempt to create a movie with more vigor and intensity. However, the end result is a mildly entertaining, but overall empty movie. It fails to deliver the tense atmosphere of the first movie, even if it does sharpen the humor of the first in some moments. These brief one liners delivered by the characters offer most of the entertainment of the movie, which is nit necessarily the best complement to give to what was a serious horror movie.
This time around we have a more colorful group of characters. AJ Cook portrays what turns out to be a very compelling leading character. She manages to add a little more intrigue to the film, and is one of the main reasons the film is worth watching at all. The best character of the movie is probably Kat, who offers a does of effective dark humor to the film. Some of the other characters have a few clever moments. However, some are absolutely irritating. It was a great relief to find out that Kimberly's friends were not in that much of the movie as what screen time they did get, they proved to be insufferable. And the character of Eugene (the black motorcyclist) proved to be highly unlikeable as well.
This films probably has the most convoluted plot of the whole series. The whole idea of new life is vague and baffling, but not in a way that creates intrigue for the future events of the movie. Death also works backwards in this movie for logic that takes a significant amount of thought to understand. And for a movie that is mainly supposed to be a fun romp, it seemed very out of place.
The effects of the movie are a slight improvement on the original's, however the film is still dated by today's standards. It was no doubt a grand feast for horror fans as far as the visuals go back when he first came out, however, today's audiences who were either not alive or too young to remember the film's release won't be invigorated in the same way, nor will they be as compelled to re-watch the film due to a lack of nostalgia.
However, the film is not without it's great scenes. Two in particular stand out. It features what is quite possibly the best premonition scene of the whole movie. The car pile up is now iconic in the horror community, even if the rest of the film doesn't measure up. Regardless, it is still a well shot and edited scene. The elevator death is probably the most horrific of the series, remaining both horrifying and tragic as the victim proclaims, "I don't want to die" just before death claims them. IN the most effective moment of campy humor, the end scene, involving a teenager barbequing is top notch over the top horror.
A few stellar moments, scenes, and characters prevent the film from being unwatchable, and they may even serve as reason enough to watch the movie as some will definitely enjoy the experience, however, they do not save the movie from it's weaknesses. Some audiences, such as the crowds of people and fans who flocked to theaters after viewing the first one, and the most gore thirsty and least demanding horror fanatics will have a great time with the movie, and will be able to put it's flaws to the side. However, it does not escape the more critical eye unscathed.
Final Destination (2000)
Original, if Slightly Dated, Thriller
It's surprising that the first film in a long running series still remains one of the most beloved as, in a series known for high amounts of gore, the death scenes in the film seem a little less memorable in comparison. However, Final destination delivers on all of the campy thrills we have come to expect from teen horror movies, and it does so in a marvelously original fashion.
What has now become an iconic plotline with horror fans, the film follows a group of high school students who escape death after one of them has a premonition of a plane crash. Inspired loosely by the real life story of a real life story in which a woman avoided death because of a gut feeling she shouldn't get on a plane, the movie manages to grasp at some genuine tension in it's earliest moments. As the film progresses, it begins to devolve into a more campy sense of dread, as you begin to await the deaths of the remaining teens.
Devon Sawa turns in a capable performance as the lead, and he is backed up sufficiently by the supporting cast, including Ali Larter, Kerr Smith, and Kristen Cloke. The writing present here is solid, and the story provides us with a solid group of characters. Even despite some initial friction with some of them, you never really want to see any of them bite the dust, and as a result, watching death slowly approach them grasps a true sense of dread.
The film is relatively old, as next year it will be coming up on it's 20th birthday. And while, you never fully expect the effects to look as good as a modern day film, the effects present here still leave much to be desired. However that is easily forgivable due to the amount of originality present in this now treasured movie.
Regardless of the dated effects, it is impressive that a film, generally dismissed by critics of the time, has spawned a series that has cemented itself into the horror canon as well as this one has. The crown jewel of this movie is the now iconic bus death. Providing us with one of the more shocking deaths in a horror film. The impact this film has had on the horror genre is hard to ignore, and as a result the dated feel of the film is extremely easy to forgive. The film is as tense as it is entertaining, lending itself to be a film that will be watched and re-watched throughout future generations.