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aristjohn
Reviews
Paranormal Activity (2007)
By far one of the more disappointing films I've seen in many, many years...
I'm going to get haters, I know, but I have to say it: there was nothing, absolutely nothing, scary about this film. My friend and I went to see this film tonight and drove more than 40 minutes to the nearest theater that was showing it. In all honesty, there were a few times where all I could do was laugh at it. There was only one scene that I could see where some could classify as even REMOTELY scary (essentially maybe just more a bit creepy than anything else), and I state that lightly. There are far more 'ghost' films that have had me laying in bed and saying a little prayer after hearing a bump in the night -- this is BY FAR not on that list.
The acting was somewhat okay for the exception of two characters: Katie's friend and The Psychic. The film was too short, deliberate I know due to the nature and style of the film, but in seeing how long it took to get to the point... the film was just FAR too short. My greatest moment of horror/shock was not on the screen but off. A young lady (around the age of 20 or so) went into hysterics with her friends staring back at her in horror before laughing. She hyperventilated (appeared to be in anticipation of what was fixing to happen) and then began to sob uncontrollably at what was supposed to be a 'scary' scene -- which was not IMHO. Immediately after the movie she went to the bathroom to console herself; with her friends trailing behind still laughing.
Now, I don't write that to positively promote this film (though I recognize some out of pure curiosity may want to go see it even more with the above account), but I'm writing it to say that for someone to react in the way she did is just incredibly strange and shocking to the psyche. I've had interesting experiences in my home that would not only make her mess herself, but probably have her just plain keel over.
Take it from someone who has seen a many of horror films
this is NOT worth the eight bucks and the ten in popcorn and a drink; nor the time and gas for those who aren't privy to a local theater carrying their desired movie. It's ridiculous. If I didn't beat myself up for believing the hype and seeing this drek, I would have asked for my money back.
How so many could classify this as 'one of the' or 'the' scariest films they've ever seen is beyond me. I'm shocked at the amount of hype this film has gotten. It's reminiscent of the hype for Blair Witch Project or Cloverfield, and it's almost just plain shameful that so many would walk out after-the-fact of seeing this film and still believe the hype.
I give it a 1 for effort and a 2 for the producers of this film succeeding in making a film of pure drek and turning it into a gold mine for their own pockets at the expense of the movie goer -- all for a total of a big fat 3.
Transmorphers (2007)
Unfortunately there is nothing below the "1"
Honestly, I think Leigh Scott and the fine folks at Asylum just wanted to see how many of us idiots rented the film believing it said "Transformers" on the cover.
Because my mind can find no other reason, and I mean NO reason, on why this film was created. The acting, the script, the effects -- it was all very much.... sub-par for even a low budget film.
I'll watch any movie at least once, and sometimes twice on even the more less appealing of films just to see if I missed something the first time around. But, I can guarantee you there will be no watching this a second time. There's nothing to miss. What you see is what you get, and unfortunately that isn't much at all.