cribyn44 Reviews

12 Years a Slave (2013)

A totally flat and pedestrian directorial exercise

[1/10 · 7 June 2016]

I could not believe the extent to which this film was "honoured" at the 2014 Oscars. I found its directorial handling to be flat and pedestrian, and even boring in parts. The film consisted of "scene" after "scene", without conveying any real sense of movement, tension, and development in the story as a key illumination to the American history of slavery in the years leading to the American Civil War and the eventual emancipation of slaves in the United States of America. Contrary to received "wisdom", I found Chiwetel Ejiofor's performance as Solomon wooden in the extreme - as though he was sleep-walking throughout (unlike his brilliant performance in "Kinky Boots"). Ms Lupita Nyong'o ran away with the film with her heart-rending performance as Patsey.

The American (2010)

Yet another stinker of a movie for George Clooney

[1/10 · 24 September 2015]

My wife and I have sat through George Clooney's "Syriana" twice on television, and not once did we "get" what the film was all about. And now, at the end of viewing "The American", we felt like throwing all but the kitchen sink at the television! For quite some time into the film there was an acceptable degree of tension created in following the subject "Jack" from Sweden on his travel and then sojourn in Italy (complete with great countryside shots). But then: WHAT? Good film scripts like all good books need to have a comprehensible narrative which transport the viewer/reader along with them. Certainly not in this real stinker and bore of a movie. Attitudinising on the part of the character and actor conveyed nothing about the so-called plot - assuming there was one but it was certainly invisible to us. No, a dreadful and irritating waste of time for us.

The Unfaithful Wife (1969)

Typical so-called French "intellectual chic" of the 1960s

[2/10 · 14 October 2010]

I only managed to get just past the point of the husband's murder of his wife's lover before switching off because it was far too late to continue with this dulling example of so-called French "intellectual chic" of the 1960s. Some examples back then were so bad - "deep intellectual musing" over just a cup of coffee or glass of wine etc. Here, we fell about laughing about two things. One, whenever the husband's vivacious and flirty mini-skirted secretary made her far too infrequent flighty appearances on screen - that really brought the screen to life. Two, which had us both laughing out loud: the scene where the husband bounds up the body of the murdered lover, struggles the whole time he is dragging it out of the latter's ground floor flat to push it with difficulty into the boot of his car, in broad daylight and right opposite an apartment block with windows (a previous scene had shown a window cleaner at the apartment block) - and yet, and yet, not a single car passes by the whole time. Nor, however much one tries to find them on screen, can a single human being be seen. And this is presumably in the morning or afternoon of a busy Parisian day in the suburb of Neuilly. What a lucky tourist it would be to find such peace and quiet anywhere today in modern day Paris. And yet again, another pretentious French film from the 1960s.

Vinyan (2008)

Fit only for stressed insomniacs

[1/10 · 26 August 2010]

I only watched this film very late at night/early hours of the morning on t.v. because of sleep problems. I found it an awfully depressing film, not so much because of the seemingly tragic story of parents who had lost their child in the 2004 tsunami and chased off recklessly and stupidly into the Burmese jungle, being hoodwinked and robbed throughout their nightmare journey, but because I felt the not entirely structured "story" went downhill from the outset. Throughout, I felt exceedingly sorry for all the actors who precociously the film-makers decided should stand before the cameras precisely at the time the Thai monsoons hit the country. The only thing that kept going through my mind was that the script writers and others involved in setting up this film must have had some bad sleepless nights in coming up (almost, and seemingly in desperation for supposedly an "original" story) with what was obviously a concoction based on several other nightmarish films: e.g. the Julie Christie Donald Sutherland depressing 1973 film, "Don't Look Now" (where the couple's dead child who kept "appearing" to them in Venice was likewise dressed in red, as was the child in "Vinyan"); "Lord of the Flies"; and of course "Apocalypse Now". I found the ending hilarious - that's where the youngish boys from the forest surround the topless wife and rub mud all over the top of her undressed body. You could see from the happy grins and smiles on the faces of some of the lucky young boy actors facing her, how they were really enjoying themselves rubbing mud all over her naked breasts. They must have earned untold kudos from their school mates when recounting that pleasurable experience for them!

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)

Tedious and Tiresome beyond Measure

[1/10 · 14 August 2010]

Havng just caught it again on television... I was sorry I spent so much of my evening watching it. I found it tedious and tiresome (and at times ridiculous) beyond measure. As with most Kevin Costner films (whatever role he assumes - actor, director, producer), it all ends up as a tiresome exercise in self-indulgence on his part. There was no real "story" as such, merely a succession of various vignettes simply to pad out the time for theatre presentations - and as for that awful music, it drove me nuts. It sounded like the muzak music so often employed in Hollywood films of the 1940s - it just went on and on and on, as background wallpaper of an audio kind. It was so monotonous it hardly changed tempo or theme, despite what scenes were appearing on screen. Thank goodness film music today is often an art form in itself (e.g. Ridley Scott's "The Kingdom of Heaven", and many others). Definitely, this film will never make an appearance in our DVD collection, not even if a supermarket is throwing it away for one pound.

Robin Hood (2010)

"Null point" for Ridley Scott's disastrous bore and mish mash of a film

[1/10 · 16 May 2010]

As an admirer of Ridley Scott's work - especially "Gladiator" but above all the totally outstanding "Kingdom of Heaven" - my wife and I went to see this in the cinema with some "good" expectations. Unfortunately, I couldn't wait for the whole farrago to come to a painful conclusion. The film is a total mess because its screenplay is simply horrendous. It has no proper "story" or structural narrative, the whole thing being like a quilt made up of different strands of so-called "story", which are then stitched together at odd times ["stiched-up" for the audience is a better description] in the forlorn hope that this will somehow make a "whole" thing emerge on the screen. The fault lies entirely with the scriptwriter, Brian Helgeland, for the most total rubbish screenplay I have ever seen - as well as with Ridley Scott for allowing himself to spend money and time filming this rubbish. Other commentators - especially "justin 55839": "A Disaster of a Movie" - have correctly picked up all the holes in the script and the film. This film really needs to be consigned to the rubbish bin. The only thing that kept me somehow half-interested was listening to the excellent soundtrack. Except there again, certain horrors of horror kept coming to the fore. I couldn't believe I was hearing 19th or 20th century Irish folk music as the background to the olde ye English folks people of the 12th century enjoying themselves around the village camp fires at night! Thank goodness the other two films of Scott's I mentioned above will help to keep his reputation intact.

Avatar (2009)

A movie experience like no other

[10/10 · 9 January 2010]

My family and I were completely blown away by this film - more, rather, a film EXPERIENCE like no other that has been in the cinema before. It was absolutely spell-binding, and especially in 3-D and shown on the largest IMAX screen in London, England. Moreovoer, my wife and I found it not only a totally gripping film experience but also to be a very emotional film and story indeed.

My strongest advice to anyone wishing to see this film is this: DO NOT read anything about the film or its story before you go to the cinema. Simply, DO NOT. Instead, go the cinema with a 'blank canvas' of a mind and allow the film and its magical story to wash over you and unfold.

Interestingly and throughout, I spotted how this film, in a review, could also be called "Avatar" meets "A Man Called Horse" meets "Jurassic Park" meets "The Lost World" meets "Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee". That is, put simply, there is clear evidence in the film how certain cultural influences have obviously had an effect on the director James Cameron over the years. As such, he deserves all the credit and congratulations he receives for such a truly masterful work. And in a couple of months' time, the film should walk away with any number of well deserved Oscars.

Hannibal Rising (2007)

Intriguingly enjoyable after a fashion

[7/10 · 23 November 2009]

My wife and I quite enjoyed this, especially given a "tv guide's" negative description of the film. Accepting it for the "less than Oscar material" it obviously was, we were hooked tight to the film from the beginning and all the way to the end. The best way to enjoy this film is, in a way, to try to "forget" that it was supposed to be about the early formative years of Hannibal Lector - and see it as a fairly straightforward but well-constructed revenge thriller.

The only thing about the film which strongly irritated me was the casting of the world's best known Chinese beauty film actress, Gong-Li, as a "Japanese" person (for goodness sake!). Given the "intellectual" property and standing of this (still enjoyable) film, I felt this casting was somehow demeaning of her international stature as an actress.

I know I "shouldn't", but I wouldn't be too surprised that if a cheaply-priced DVD of the film comes up in front of me on the internet, I shall purchase it (even if it makes me feel somehow "guilty!").

A Good Year (2006)

Crowe's performance: total embarrassment

[1/10 · 13 July 2009]

I managed just about 50 minutes of this awful piece of trash when viewing on the television. I found Russell Crowe's so-called "performance" painful and embarrassing to watch. For what I saw of his performance and the film, it struck me that he was trying to do a tenth-rate imitation of Hugh Grant at his very worst of trying to perform a so-called "dizzy" Englishman - and yes, I can't stand any of Grant's performances either. The most astonishing thing about this film is whatever persuaded Crowe to even think about doing it, let alone finally agreeing to this totally awful and useless piece of schmaltz. If one is being generous, I suppose Crowe was trying (and desperately at that) to put "something" into such an awful script. Every actor in this film was wasted, and no, even the gorgeous French countryside could not make up one iota for this total waste of space and time.

The Departed (2006)

Yet another grossly inflated piece of directorial and actors' self-indulgence

[3/10 · 30 June 2009]

So very glad not to have spent money on this film in a cinema, but watched it only on TV. I do wish that some of today's directors and actors would immerse themselves in an intense examination of some of the Hollywood and British movies of the 1940s and 1950s to see how really to make films that are crisp and tight in direction, how the actors of those times were able to speak their lines in clear and understandable English, and that self-indulgent acts (actors) like Jack Nicholson simply were not given the time of day.

As for this film, far too much of it was devoted to scene after scene of interminable length, simply so that the director and actors could show off their alleged "skills". That was, instead of the director getting hold of the central storyline - potentially, quite good - and his actors by the scruff of the neck and stating quite clearly: okay, guys, let's really get on with this and concentrate on the core essentials of the story in as tight a manner as possible.

Instead, the whole film went on and on in a cumulative exercise of screaming tedium. And, I bet, that you wouldn't see for those old films the interminable list of continuity goofs that accompany the comments on this film on the IMDb entry!

Red Cliff (2008)

Visually exciting but missing "viewer engagement"

[7/10 · 17 June 2009]

Have just seen the UK release of this film in a cinema. The spectacular battles are quite overwhelming viewing, and thereby hangs one of the slight problems with this film. At the beginning especially the viewer is made to feel right inside the battle formations - and for too long, seemingly going on forever and that's about it. At key battle points the director should have "pulled back" to present the viewer with more of an overview. And, for far too long, the director failed to involve or engage the viewer with any of the main characters in a story which, at the beginning at least, takes time to unravel all its complexities. And, as a western viewer of this film, it was quite difficult to keep up with the facial characteristics of (to us) a range of "unknown" Chinese actors. It was only when the focus of the film moved to the site of the Red Cliffs that you could begin to feel far more engaged in the film and to care far more about what was going on. We shall probably experience the same with this film as we did with "Curse of the Golden Flower", and enjoy it far more at home on DVD because you can then focus more intently on the "story" rather than, as in the cinema, being completely overwhelmed by the sheer volume and speed of the spectacle. I also found it quite "funny" seemingly every time a charge was to be undertaken in a battle, to hear snippets of Aaron Copeland's "Fanfare for the Common Man" on the soundtrack. I also have to say that I was completely wowed out by Chiling Lin who played Xiao Quiao, the wife of Zhou Yu. Could really have spent the whole of the film gazing at her exquisite face!

Prime Suspect: The Scent of Darkness (1995 TV Movie)

A key lead withheld from the viewer

[5/10 · 13 June 2009]

Have just watched this on DVD. However, completely mystified as to how a sudden telephone call to the main police station at the end (according to the useful IMDb synopsis, from Tennison herself) leads detective "Mitchell" to exclaim "we've got him" - and then suddenly the viewer is made aware that the killer of victims 7 and 8 is actually the prison guard of Marlowe.

How, may one ask, did Tennison (if, she) "suddenly" become aware that it was after all the prison guard of Marlowe? In credible crime thrillers you just can't spring this sort of thing on a viewer. It just is not "on" because that kind of denouement has to be built up very carefully indeed.

The Men (1950)

A glaring mistake

[5/10 · 9 June 2009]

Have only caught up with this film for a few (significant) moments on television, especially the two scenes in which Marlon Brando is driving himself and his friend back to the hospital after being out in a bar (and when they also crash), and the final scene where he drives himself back to his home with Teresa Wright, I spotted one glaring mistake in particular.

Acknowledging the fact that when the film was made, there was much less knowledge and awareness of all the issues associated with various forms of disablement. But the thing which immediately struck me about these two scenes was that Brando, as a supposed paraplegic, was up there on screen driving a heavy American car of the 1950s, without a single driving aid to be seen on the screen - such as a remote gear change device or even knobs on the steering wheel to assist with the steering of cars for such people.

Quantum of Solace (2008)

An absurd and preposterous bore

[1/10 · 21 April 2009]

I only caught up with this film on DVD, and was so glad not to have forked out precious money on a cinema seat to have seen this farrago of total nonsense. Apart from the film being absurd and preposterous all the way through, actually, its worst sin in my eyes was that it was all a total bore.

Reflecting more, and picking up a few points from other critical comments on IMDb, it struck me that all of the film-makers concerned - scriptwriters, producers, directors, and even some of the actors - must have a real contempt for the intelligence of the cinema-going film-watching public. Not once in the film was there any attempt to present the viewer with a coherent story line. When the audience was grudgingly granted a scene containing no more than a dozen lines of dialogue which barely hinted at that particular stage of the clearly non-existent plot, the viewer was then pummelled in the head with lots of irrelevant and absurd "action" set pieces, which actually had one rolling in the aisles at home with uncontrollable laughter at the utter stupidity of each of those exercises.

And then, just before the film makers thought that the audience might "just" then be wanting to know what the hell was going on with some "story" etc, they were whisked off to yet another exotic location for Daniel Craig to do his "okay, so it's Thursday, so I must be in Haiti", strutting around as his particular form of "acting"; or no, "it's Friday so we must be in Bolivia", behaving all the time in such a self-important manner as though every misbegotten viewer of this nonsense should somehow be admiring him! To be fair, Daniel Craig was good and threatening in his role as the would-be assassin priest in "Elizabeth".

That's another thing which really got me about this film. All the actors concerned seemed to take themselves far too seriously and self-importantly - cocky is the word, - just because they were in a "Bond" film. Pretentious, the lot of them! Seriously, this so-called "Bond" film should be laid to rest with the whole of the Bond film franchise so that we see no more of these useless films, under the heading, "R.I.P".

Once Upon a Time in the West (1968)

Vastly overrated - totally inferior to The Searchers

[1/10 · 8 April 2009]

As has happened so many times before, I am quite sure that the film I watched under discussion is most certainly NOT the same film as seen by other commentators. Or rather, and maybe, it is the basic film nous of the other commentators which really needs commenting upon! I have tried to watch this film several times on television. Mostly, I can never last beyond the first 20 minutes, but last evening I managed up to about the last half an hour before falling asleep. It was only by reading the excellent and first-class Synopsis provided on the IMDb web-site that I finally understood what the film was supposed to be about.

Unfortunately for any judgement on this film, only a few days ago I watched John Ford's "The Searchers" once again. Now, there, you have a true western masterpiece! The story is told in a straightforward, concise, and economical manner, without any of the so-called modern tricks of slow meandering camera movements and/or long and supposedly pregnant moments of silence. I found "Once Upon a Time in the West" totally pretentious and often rather silly and "posing". During its first hour virtually nothing of the story was ever spelt out or even got going. As to calling this a "masterpiece" and other such nonsense terms, some people really need to educate themselves about what is good and bad cinema. "The Searchers" - the absolute best! "Once Upon a Time"? - awful and hopeless.

36th Precinct (2004)

Brilliant to the nth degree!

[10/10 · 4 December 2008]

Unfortunately, I had never heard or seen anything of this film until/before BBC-Four showed it on television. Why oh why did it not receive a general release in England? What is wrong with some of these film distributors? Except that the answer probably lies in their belief that the mass of the English film-going public, which forever seems intent only on stuffing their faces from two-foot high buckets of popcorn, doesn't have the kudos to appreciate total brilliance of this kind from a "different" kind of film source, ie. Europe instead of the ubiquitous "Hollywood".

I thought everything about this film was brilliant: the intriguing and ever-evolving script was top class and kept one's brain engaged the whole time, the editing throughout was as sharp as a razor and kept one's eyes constantly glued to the screen, the whole being complemented and in fact "fixed" by the acting of all the actors/actresses involved.

Let's hope that a more reasonably priced DVD of this outstanding film than the over-the-top priced one presently on offer at Amazon.co.uk soon makes an appearance. Really, I would dearly have loved to have seen this film in a cinema which (ideally) bans the consumption of popcorn and cola drinks.

That Old Feeling (1997)

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful screwball comedy!

[10/10 · 14 November 2008]

When I read the synopsis for this film on the t.v. channel, I immediately assumed it was one of those "screwball comedies" of the 1930s. Instead, it turned out to be a "modern" screwball comedy which kept us glued to the screen the whole time. Everything about the film was so enjoyable: the acting of everyone, and above all the clever writing, managing to relate all the main characters in the filmic version of a quadrille. By the looks of things, I would guess that everyone involved thoroughly enjoyed themselves in the making of this film. As always, Bette Midler was supreme, whilst this film yet again showed how brilliant and versatile an actor is Dennis Farina.

Crash (I) (2004)

Blown away by this film

[10/10 · 30 October 2008]

I have now seen this film a second time on t.v., and the second viewing completely blew me away. Sure, I have read some of the other criticisms of it posted on IMDb, but this is one film where you just have to go with the flow. In fact, I thought it was totally brilliant. I particularly liked the "soft" and measured pace of the direction and final editing of the film which completely pulls in the viewer, which was perfectly and outstandingly complemented by the terrific choice of different types of music for the soundtrack throughout. This time as well I felt myself becoming more and more emotionally involved with all of the individual characters and their individual dilemmas in this hardly easy business of being a human being on this modern planet of ours. As before, the scene which really got to my heart and emotions was the traumatic scene in which the Persian shopkeeper "shoots" the locksmith's daughter - and doesn't! That really tugs at the heartstrings. All in all a terrific ensemble undertaking, and congratulations to all concerned. Now, probably, for the DVD!

Murder in the First (1995)

Impactful!

[8/10 · 21 October 2008]

Having caught up again with this film on t.v., I can only support all other commentators who have observed how utterly ridiculous is the American Academy Award system for not having even nominated the utterly brilliant performance by Kevin Bacon in this film for the best actor award, let alone in not giving him the damned thing! I am always impressed by whatever Kevin Bacon does, and am constantly surprised that he is one of those stars who always seems to creep under the public's radar of appreciation and awareness. As to the comments about the film not exactly being the "true" story of Henri Young, there again it always come down to the precise meaning and interpretation of a film's initial caveat of "inspired by a true story". Certainly, the film will have me searching the internet for more of the "true" facts of this harrowing story. And whether exactly the film was totally "true" or not, as any visitor to Alcatraz (as I have been myself) can tell you, just imagine yourself in any part of that prison in its heyday and say whether any filmic representation needs to be totally 100% accurate to convey the horrendous nature of what it must have been like there. Returning to the antics of the members of the U.S. Academy Award, their failures over this Kevin Bacon performance remind me of the time they robbed Cate Blanchett for her out of this world outstanding performance in "Elizabeth" in favour of that whimpering blonde piece of fluffy air Gwyneth Paltrow for the paltry "Shakespeare in Love".

Gomorrah (2008)

Repulsive and Incompetent Film-Making at its Worst

[1/10 · 17 October 2008]

I have long come to the conclusion that many contributors of "opinions" about films that are posted on the IMDb web-site must belong to the human version of the lemmings who rush together to fall in company with each other over the edge of the cliff. So that, once you get one of these persons describing this farrago of a film as "great" or a "masterpiece", soon they are all at it! My wife and I managed to last just about an hour in the cinema last evening, before having had enough of this hopeless mess and mish mash and getting up and walking out, leaving the rest of the near empty cinema to it. Whilst the violence and repulsiveness of everything on screen was bad enough, although not surprising (and therefore not entirely "unacceptable" or surprising) in view of what one has seen in several recent films from Brazil and Colombia, it was the actual structure of the film that I found to be an insult to the intelligence of the intelligent film-goer.

There was no attempt to create an intelligible structure to the whole, nothing the viewer could get a grip on in terms of latching on to any single character or thread to anything that resembled half a comprehensible story and script. It was just one chaotic charade after another - and for those who don't really understand, "chaos" does not produce intelligible literature or cinema.

Next time I shall learn to pay more attention to some of the more perceptive film critics and not be persuaded by some who otherwise ought to join some of the lemming-like creatures on IMDb.

Once Upon a Time in America (1984)

An Over-Hyped Piece of Pretentiousness Throughout

[1/10 · 16 October 2008]

The whole point of a "story" - whatever the medium used to tell it - is that it has a beginning, a middle, and an end. Anyone who tampers with that simple principle is just asking for trouble.

As soon as I saw the opening of this film on television I thought, "oh, oh, here we go again, pretentiousness at its worst". In other words, the film starts off at Point A-10, shifts forwards to something like K-2 and then back again to B-3 .....and so on and on it goes. I stuck with this film from before midnight through to a 03.A.M. showing, and in the end (absolutely tired out) I was furious with myself for having stayed up to watch it. By near to the end I had become totally confused at what the hell was going on, what the purpose of everything was, and then the viewer is presented with that completely useless and senseless end to the film.

Besides which, I can't say that I am a fan of Robert DeNiro's acting. I find the man super-self-important in anything and everything he does - a complete turn-off so far as I am concerned.

All of this is a pity since had the director decided to behave maturely and present a much more comprehensible story in a conventional and narrative and chronological manner - such as the Godfather films - he could have hit a goldmine with the story of the nascent Jewish gangsters who grew up and emerged from the Lower East Side east European immigrant communities of early twentieth century New York.

Instead, he completely blew his chances. As to how anyone can describe this film as a "masterpiece" or even put it above the Godfather films in cinematic worth- please, do educate yourselves about the modern cinema and what narratives are all about!

The Return of a Man Called Horse (1976)

Pointless and Useless Sequel

[1/10 · 12 October 2008]

Caught this by accident on a t.v. showing - and could hardly believe how utterly awful the whole experience was. By comparison, the original "A Man Called Horse" was spell-binding because it held one's interest throughout. But this piece of nonsense - words fail me. It was bad enough to have some kind of a "story" presented with all the impact of a wet loaf of bread, but that error was compounded by the obvious lack of subtitles throughout whenever the so-called "Sioux" spoke. For goodness sake, couldn't the film-makers have found enough North American Indians who were also actors and near-actors to perform as "Indians" in this farrago instead of the imposters they actually used? I also found it quite embarrassing watching Richard Harris cavorting all around the countryside at the obvious behest of the director standing just behind camera, telling him to run and jump from pointless Point A to pointless Point B just to make up film footage and minutes. Absolutely terrible in all respects!

Jodhaa Akbar (2008)

Slightly slow and poor music

[6/10 · 12 September 2008]

We first saw this film in the cinema and were duly impressed by its sweep and splendour: the colours and action sequences were very impressive. However, watching it at home on DVD the languorous nature of the director's handling of his subject became (unfortunately) more and more apparent. Above all, though, what disappointed me greatly was the extremely poor nature of the music by A R Rhaman composed for this film. Compared to the great (and late) Naushad, this aspect of the film fell completely and totally flat when watching the DVD. Music-wise, then, this film comes nowhere the great classic music provided by Naushad for, for example, "Mughal-E-Azam" (one of the truly greats), "Umrao Jaan", and others.

Gone Baby Gone (2007)

Interesting but requiring subtitles for audiences in England

[6/10 · 8 June 2008]

An interesting little film, with neat plot twists along the way - albeit (so far as one could establish) in a slightly contrived way. The film also concludes, interestingly, on a "difficult" debating point. However, yet again a modern American film - unlike the giants of the 1940s - falls down because the actors constantly fail to articulate their words clearly, and in this film it is Casey Affleck, with his somewhat "affected" style of speaking, who is the worst offender. It has now got the point at home that very often we have to press the subtitle switch on 'the box' in order to make heads or tails of the plots of American films, so bad and awful is the diction. And in this present film, total clarity of hearing was an absolute must in order to keep up with the eventual convoluted plot. Maybe the problem also lies with modern recording equipment in America. Nevertheless, something is wrong somewhere since we find this such a constant problem with American films, in the cinema and when watching them on the television.

Donnie Darko (2001)

Donnie Darko: Pretentiousness Personified

[1/10 · 22 October 2007]

Time and again I read the comments of other people on IMDb on films I have found to be truly awful - just to see what other people think of them - only to find the majority of them describing the film in question as wonderful, brilliant, awe-inspiring etc. Again, the comments I have found on "Donnie Darko" are no exception to this general rule.

My wife and I have only just watched "Donnie Darko" on DVD and were furious in the extreme at having wasted over two hours of our time on this annoying and frustrating rubbish that "cleverly" tried to be so-called "art". We absolutely abhor films that start off from a certain premise, and then at the end the viewer is confronted with the nasty trick of, "Ho, ho, this just didn't happen this way at all!".

So that, in "Donnie Darko", the sleep-walking character of Donnie Darko - played by the epitome of the somnambulist actor of all time in all his varied film roles, Jake Gyllenhaal - is shown to have escaped the falling jet engine on his bedroom (occurring at the beginning of the film) because the "bunny rabbit" by the name of "Frank" had mysteriously got him out of the house, only for the film to end with the very fact of the jet engine killing D. D. in his bedroom.

Certainly, this kind of "twist" between a film's starting "reality" and concluding "unreality" has been seen many times before, most notably in the Bruce Willis masterpiece, "The Sixth Sense". There, though, it works absolutely brilliantly, so much so that every time I watch the film it leaves me very disturbed and upset.

But not this time. We were both angry with ourselves for watching this piece of utter pretentious nonsense, and straightaway the DVD ended up in our rubbish bin where it truly belonged.