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Reviews
Silent Hill (2006)
Good horror, but the story makes no sense...
Let's get one thing clear right from the get-go: This film's plot makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. Even the "explanation" given at the end of the film as to why the demons/ghosts (or whatever you want to call them) are so ticked off really doesn't explain the story, the origins of Sharon, nor does it add to the story in any way whatsoever. Also, if the film's main character, Rose, were an actual person, she'd be the dumbest person who has ever walked the face of the earth. There is absolutely no rational explanation for half of the things she does in this movie, including speeding away from a cop at 100 miles per hour with her daughter in the car.
That being said, however, I will say that this film does deliver the goods in terms of horror and gore. The visual style of the film is downright creepy, and there is enough blood-splattering to rival any of the great horror movies (including a woman getting the skin ripped off her body; and the barbed wire massacre at the conclusion). The only criticism I would have is that the film's greatest monster -- a dude with a giant, metal triangle for a head wielding a machete that is so freakishly big it's almost comical -- is not shown enough.
All in all, the story makes no sense, but the horror and special effects are great.
Cradle 2 the Grave (2003)
Things I learned from this film...
1) The Chairman of Kitchen Stadium for Iron Chef America is evil! 2) Black diamonds are priceless but you don't want to wear them because they tend to blow up. 3) DMX has no formal training in the martial arts yet can beat up those with black belts. 3) Jet Li really likes Johnny Cash because he only fights important battles when he's surrounded by a ring of fire (See Romeo Must Die and Kiss of the Dragon). 4) Kung Fu is more powerful then ultimate fighting. 5) DMX: Loving father by night and murderous diamond thief by day. Go figure. 6) Tom Arnold is really as stupid and talentless as he seems. 7) Fat black guys can make it big in prison