timotheos-96845 Reviews

Guy Ritchie's the Covenant (I) (2023)

Gets going after a slow start

[6/10 · 9 July 2023]

If you can make it past the first 30 minutes of wooden acting and terrible dialogue, this turns into a thrilling action movie.

The first act is painful to watch at times, aside from the Afghan interpreter, played by Dar Salim Ahmed. I guess I was expecting more with Guy Ritchie's name attached to it, but it settles into it's once the action kicks in.

They try to do a pretty good job of establishing the bond between Marines, and they do OK, but living up to the films name, it's really about the bond between Gyllenhaal and his interpreter.

Watch it for the story and the action, but not necessarily the acting, and you'll enjoy it.

Blood & Gold (2023)

Nazi Spaghetti Western

[8/10 · 29 May 2023]

This is straight up the plot from an old spaghetti western, complete with hangings, gold, a woman on the farm, and everything in between. Even the music, the font and color of the credits is an homage to the western movies of yesteryear telling the tale of one man versus many.

Now, change the setting from the Old West to the final days of WWII and you find yourself asking why is this not been done before? Add in some gratuitous violence and you'll be surprised how perfectly well the two ideas pair together and you won't be disappointed.

Comparisons to Tarantino are accurate but there's nothing wrong with that!

Citadel (2023– )

Plot Hole City

[3/10 · 29 May 2023]

Yes, the Russo brothers give you some action as you'd expect, but this is such a mess of massive plot holes and impossibilities that you can't take it seriously.

Too many times I found myself asking how did they do this? How did they know to do that? Why didn't they just do this instead?

This whole show is based around incredible technology, but some of the things they do, or some of the things they forget to do in light of this technology is just laughable.

The villain, Davik, does alright, there's just not enough of him, and Tucci as always does well with what little he's got to work with. Just disappointing given the hype.

That Dirty Black Bag: Chapter One: A Head Weighs Less Than a Body (2022) Season 1, Episode 1

'Bowie' knife?

[1/10 · 20 May 2022]

C'mon...it's the first line of the show and they mispronounce Bowie Knife. If they can't get that right, they should be ashamed of themselves for making a western.

The Last Duel (2021)

Two Hours Too Long

[3/10 · 30 October 2021]

Telling the story once...fine. Telling it a second time...hmmm, I'll let it slide. But telling it a third time? Audible groans in the audience. Just get on with the duel already. You made us suffer through two grueling and overly long rape scenes, good grief...this movie could've been 15 minutes long and and we'd have still gotten the sorry.

Hard pass.

What If...?: What If... Captain Carter Were the First Avenger? (2021) Season 1, Episode 1

School of Rey?

[3/10 · 16 August 2021]

Looks like Peggy learned how to kick tail at the same place Rey learned how to fight. Ugh.

But the animation is cool, even if the mouth movements are pretty off. Hopefully going forward the storytelling will get better.

The White Lotus (2021–2025)

Going nowhere

[4/10 · 11 August 2021]

The Armond character is the only redeeming thing about this show. I could only watch an episode and a half and I already feel like I've wasted my time and want it back. I really wanted to like it, but it's just going nowhere. I just can't get invested in the uninteresting characters.

Old (2021)

Could've been so much better

[5/10 · 4 August 2021]

My biggest gripe with this movie is that some seriously crazy stuff is going on, but nobody seems very concerned about any of it. If those things happened to me, I would be freaking the F out. Very unrealistic reactions. Interesting concept but for delivery. And as many have noted, the constant panning makes for blurry visuals and it's very annoying.

Monsters (2010)

Snoozefest

[4/10 · 18 July 2021]

I'm not sure why this movie was even made. I kept waiting and waiting for something to happen...

Them (2021– )

Fanning the flames of racism

[4/10 · 6 May 2021]

Wow. Interesting show, but it's hard to get past the fact that the creators are intent on making the viewers hate whites. There's not a single redeeming white person in this show.

Enemy Lines (2020)

US Marine Corpse?

[2/10 · 22 August 2020]

29 minutes in, the American Marine states he's with the US Marine Corps, but he pronounces it 'corpse.' That's just sloppy and unacceptable. I'm surprised I made it that far in, but that's when I turned it off.