It certainly was 'Payday' for Arnold Schwarzenegger in this adrenaline fuelled, body-counting action fest, which came hot on the heels of his breakthrough to superstardom in The Terminator. This has become a must see movie for all Arnold fans and it's not hard to see why 'Commando' has acquired a cult following. Slip-ups, great action, cheesy lines, cartoon humour, and above all else full on Arnold.
Let's start with the plot. (SPOILERS). The fabulously-named John Matrix, an East German ex-pat who has retired from his job as a Colonel in the Special Forces, now lives in a kind of demented dream-like existence with his daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano). They live in a log cabin in what looks suspiciously like a national park. When he is not chopping wood, carrying fake logs around, and glancing about suspiciously, Matrix enjoys spending time with Jenny in some of the cheesiest scenes in movie history, including the unforgettable moments where Arnold laughs as Jenny wipes ice cream over his face, pets a deer (!), and takes here fishing, karate training, and swimming.
Anyway, Matrix's old boss General Kirby (James Olsen) arrives by helicopter to tell him that three of his former unit have been assassinated. We have previously seen this in the pre-credits sequence, and no doubt as the audience idly wondered, Arnold asks: "who is doing it?" (Ultra stilted). Kirby's reply (remember this is supposedly a Special Forces commando who trained Matrix to SMELL his enemies from a distance), famously offers some valuable insight into the identities of the killers:
"It could have been the Syrians, the Russians, the South Americans, or a terrorist group."
Having offered this helpful information, he leaves, and seconds later of course the killer gang arrive, moments later, having followed his helicopter in 4x4s. Matrix is distracted by gunfire for long enough for the gang to kidnap Jenny, under the leadership of Capt. Bennett, (Vernon Wells) 'a man I trusted for years' says Matrix.
Bennett is one of the greatest movie characters of the 1980s and is worthy of some description. He is uniquely fat, with thin arms, a pot belly, little legs, so he waddles around. He acts mean, by the aid of his chain mail vest, a comedy handlebar moustache, and leather trousers. As if that wasn't enough, he is the campest individual you ever set eyes on, and he has a fine Australian accent! Every line uttered by Bennett is worthy of imitation, he is a truly unique villain and he has all the funniest scenes. He was kicked out of Matrix's unit and little wonder really, but now he's back for revenge by trying to kill Matrix.
Bennett has in fact been employed by a South/Central American ex-dictator called Arius (Den Hedaya), although Bennett waived the fee because he hates Matrix SO much. One of the unit's missions before it was dissolved was to depose Arius and replace him with President Velasquez, for which Matrix was made a 'hero of the revolution', and Bennett was fired at the same time. So the two have got together to take Arius's country (Val Verde, from Die Hard 2) back, and pay back Matrix in the process.
Here's the deal then John: fly to Val Verde under supervision, depose the president you helped to power, and you can get Jenny back. Matrix seems to be a man use to taking orders, not following them, so as soon as he gets onto the plane he kills his minder and jumps off mid-takeoff into a convenient swamp. And there it is. He has until the plane to secretly work out where his daughter is, before his actions are discovered by the terrorists.
I won't go into all the hilarious details but suffice it to say there are enough comedy moments here to fill a Naked Gun movie, and indeed at times Commando does feel like a spoof. Nobody seems quite sure if it is or not, probably it started off serious but Arnold saw that the quality of the script and direction being pretty low grade, he would inject his unique humour into this and make it an ego-driven kill-a-thon with a comic edge, rather than an out and out actioner.
Of particular interest are the final showdown between Matrix and Bennett, the latter of whom inexplicably believes himself to have "an edge" and destined to win. Their fist fight, complete with outrageous dialogue in keeping with the rest of Commando, is a total riot and needs to be seen to be believed. Prior to this, Matrix invades an island and kills so many soldiers with the comedy unhurriedness of the A-Team that people have made games of either counting the dead bodies or drinking for every person killed. There must have been a few drunken people watching this then but in truth you can enjoy all this perfectly sober, as apparently the makers must have been on something if they thought the cartoon violence here looked realistic and convincing. There are so many great non-sensical moments, ten reviews couldn't do justice.
This is probably what people mean when they talk about a 'typical Arnold Schwarzenegger film': the acting is either amusingly bad or ridiculously over the top, and in Arnold's case it is almost a self parody of sorts with his deadpan stilted delivery. This movie could not have been made in any decade but the 1980s, there are so many wonderful moments, not all intentional, that make this one of the most loved (and for some the most laughed at) action movies ever. It's certainly not a technically brilliant film but it is 100% fun.
P.S. Look out for David Patrick Kelly as one of the mobsters, who is the recipient of one of Arnold's greatest one-liners: "Remember when I said I'd kill you last? I lied!" Bill Duke from Predator is in this too!
This is a must-see for all Arnold fans and all action fans: go see it and prepare to laugh your ass off!
Let's start with the plot. (SPOILERS). The fabulously-named John Matrix, an East German ex-pat who has retired from his job as a Colonel in the Special Forces, now lives in a kind of demented dream-like existence with his daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano). They live in a log cabin in what looks suspiciously like a national park. When he is not chopping wood, carrying fake logs around, and glancing about suspiciously, Matrix enjoys spending time with Jenny in some of the cheesiest scenes in movie history, including the unforgettable moments where Arnold laughs as Jenny wipes ice cream over his face, pets a deer (!), and takes here fishing, karate training, and swimming.
Anyway, Matrix's old boss General Kirby (James Olsen) arrives by helicopter to tell him that three of his former unit have been assassinated. We have previously seen this in the pre-credits sequence, and no doubt as the audience idly wondered, Arnold asks: "who is doing it?" (Ultra stilted). Kirby's reply (remember this is supposedly a Special Forces commando who trained Matrix to SMELL his enemies from a distance), famously offers some valuable insight into the identities of the killers:
"It could have been the Syrians, the Russians, the South Americans, or a terrorist group."
Having offered this helpful information, he leaves, and seconds later of course the killer gang arrive, moments later, having followed his helicopter in 4x4s. Matrix is distracted by gunfire for long enough for the gang to kidnap Jenny, under the leadership of Capt. Bennett, (Vernon Wells) 'a man I trusted for years' says Matrix.
Bennett is one of the greatest movie characters of the 1980s and is worthy of some description. He is uniquely fat, with thin arms, a pot belly, little legs, so he waddles around. He acts mean, by the aid of his chain mail vest, a comedy handlebar moustache, and leather trousers. As if that wasn't enough, he is the campest individual you ever set eyes on, and he has a fine Australian accent! Every line uttered by Bennett is worthy of imitation, he is a truly unique villain and he has all the funniest scenes. He was kicked out of Matrix's unit and little wonder really, but now he's back for revenge by trying to kill Matrix.
Bennett has in fact been employed by a South/Central American ex-dictator called Arius (Den Hedaya), although Bennett waived the fee because he hates Matrix SO much. One of the unit's missions before it was dissolved was to depose Arius and replace him with President Velasquez, for which Matrix was made a 'hero of the revolution', and Bennett was fired at the same time. So the two have got together to take Arius's country (Val Verde, from Die Hard 2) back, and pay back Matrix in the process.
Here's the deal then John: fly to Val Verde under supervision, depose the president you helped to power, and you can get Jenny back. Matrix seems to be a man use to taking orders, not following them, so as soon as he gets onto the plane he kills his minder and jumps off mid-takeoff into a convenient swamp. And there it is. He has until the plane to secretly work out where his daughter is, before his actions are discovered by the terrorists.
I won't go into all the hilarious details but suffice it to say there are enough comedy moments here to fill a Naked Gun movie, and indeed at times Commando does feel like a spoof. Nobody seems quite sure if it is or not, probably it started off serious but Arnold saw that the quality of the script and direction being pretty low grade, he would inject his unique humour into this and make it an ego-driven kill-a-thon with a comic edge, rather than an out and out actioner.
Of particular interest are the final showdown between Matrix and Bennett, the latter of whom inexplicably believes himself to have "an edge" and destined to win. Their fist fight, complete with outrageous dialogue in keeping with the rest of Commando, is a total riot and needs to be seen to be believed. Prior to this, Matrix invades an island and kills so many soldiers with the comedy unhurriedness of the A-Team that people have made games of either counting the dead bodies or drinking for every person killed. There must have been a few drunken people watching this then but in truth you can enjoy all this perfectly sober, as apparently the makers must have been on something if they thought the cartoon violence here looked realistic and convincing. There are so many great non-sensical moments, ten reviews couldn't do justice.
This is probably what people mean when they talk about a 'typical Arnold Schwarzenegger film': the acting is either amusingly bad or ridiculously over the top, and in Arnold's case it is almost a self parody of sorts with his deadpan stilted delivery. This movie could not have been made in any decade but the 1980s, there are so many wonderful moments, not all intentional, that make this one of the most loved (and for some the most laughed at) action movies ever. It's certainly not a technically brilliant film but it is 100% fun.
P.S. Look out for David Patrick Kelly as one of the mobsters, who is the recipient of one of Arnold's greatest one-liners: "Remember when I said I'd kill you last? I lied!" Bill Duke from Predator is in this too!
This is a must-see for all Arnold fans and all action fans: go see it and prepare to laugh your ass off!