Review of Star Crystal

Star Crystal (1986)
1/10
Calling it awful still gives this movie to much credit...
28 August 2003
I can't begin to try and get across how absolutely awful Star Crystal is. I knew it was going to be bad, but nothing could prepare me for this pile of steaming doo. The acting makes most grade school plays look like Oscar material. I mean, did these people really yell "cut", and then pat each other on the backs for a job well done?

More often than not, the sets are just a black stage with a spotlight on the "actors", and the ships are nothing more than dime store models dug up from a garage sale.

Lets not forget the alien. Where's the alien from the box cover??? THAT is the movie I wanted to see. The alien here looks like a slimy reject from Fraggle Rock! Worse yet, this mess was supposed to have had some resemblance to a sci-fi horror movie, but instead turns into the Muppet Family Hour at the end!

Thank God for my DVD player's fast forward function. I would have never gotten though the last 30 minutes without speeding this trash heap up to warp 6.

My grade: F (and that's still to kind)
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