Ultra Warrior (1990)
2/10
No spoilers here, the title does a good enough job.
4 February 2000
If ever there was a movie that needed MST3K to cover, this was it. This is not a movie to see alone, as you may suffer brain hemorrhages. If you want to practice picking out continuity errors and shouting out comments, this the movie to do it with. There is so much footage taken from other movies, I'm pretty sure that the only original shots are those with the actors in the movie-and even that is doubtful. This movie is so horrible that it makes you seriously wonder how it could have been made. On average, you'll cringe about once every three minutes. There are so many holes in the plot and script, that it's full...of...well, really big holes. If you enjoy fine cinema, you'll never even be in the same section as this video. Still, Ultra Warrior has found a place near and dear to my heart. Just about everyone I know has seen it at least once at my urging. There's just something about the way that the cast and crew knew that they were making a movie that would possibly never see the light of day. No effort is made to hide the impossible jumps in the plot, the disturbingly poor special effects, the incredibly cheesy delivery of lines, or the smashingly choppy scene cuts. In fact, they revel in it. This is a movie that the people making it had fun doing. Or they were all completely insane. Completely.

But it's fun. I recommend it. A little.
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