The makers of "Three to Tango" are probably the only inhabitants of our little blue sphere who are happy that Jamie Lee Curtis' "Virus" was ever made, for it guarantees that this ill-conceived slapstick-romantic-comedy will not be remembered as THE worse film of 1999. It will certainly make several bottom ten lists I'm sure. "Tango" is less film than a motley series of scenes that are being forced upon the viewer in the hopes that the sum of such will equal "romantic comedy" and hence box office gold. There is a dearth of decent such films and survey after survey tells us that especially women want to see more of them. While studios know that cramming endless shoot-outs, explosions and clever special effects can save your basic actioner, no such rule of thumb applies to romances.
There are traditions is this genre and "Three to Tango" trots them out one after another like a bad dog show. We get a Nice Guy who needs a big break from the Super Successful Studmuffin and in pursuit of which puts him in an Awkward Situation ripe for Comedic Misunderstanding where he Meets Cute the Diamond in the Rough object of his affection who just hasn't met the Right Guy. Not helping the viewer forget all this is a discussion in the film that calls attention to such clichés (in this case the oft repeated "Let's get outta here" which I'm sure leaves many with a longing for just such). In place of attractive stars, zippy dialogue and sexual heat what we to make of such bland headliners such as Matthew Perry and Neve Campbell uttering mostly banal lines while never stimulating more than a blush of puppy love.
I'm at a loss to explain why anyone thinks Matthew Perry should be headlining films in the first place. With a square head and severe shortage in the lips & chin department he seems custom made for the "best friend" role. I'm not stupid and know that the culture-piercing success of "Friends" has Everything to do with it. "Fools Rush In" is the exception to this and "Almost Heroes" the rule. Campbell is slightly better, but barely gives off any sparks in what should have been a role played as a firecracker. Of course her role suffers from being as underwritten as the rest of the script and creates the biggest hurdle the audience is asked overcome: buying her and Dylan McDermott's relationship.
Only in the trite universe that "Tango" exists in would these two characters become Rich Guy and Mistress. That's right, Campbell's not-really-struggling artist is the kept woman of a tycoon. Excuse me, Mr. Screenwriter, I am supposed to believe that underneath all those funky clothes beats the heart of woman who thinks a sugar daddy's boy toy is her best option?! As for as the comedic aspect of this purported romantic comedy, there's not a single line worth repeating in this whole shebang. Only, and I do stress only, if you are so desperate for a night out that involves seeing such a film (and this summer's Julia Roberts' twosome are no longer even playing at the dollar theater) then see this by-the-numbers effort.
There are traditions is this genre and "Three to Tango" trots them out one after another like a bad dog show. We get a Nice Guy who needs a big break from the Super Successful Studmuffin and in pursuit of which puts him in an Awkward Situation ripe for Comedic Misunderstanding where he Meets Cute the Diamond in the Rough object of his affection who just hasn't met the Right Guy. Not helping the viewer forget all this is a discussion in the film that calls attention to such clichés (in this case the oft repeated "Let's get outta here" which I'm sure leaves many with a longing for just such). In place of attractive stars, zippy dialogue and sexual heat what we to make of such bland headliners such as Matthew Perry and Neve Campbell uttering mostly banal lines while never stimulating more than a blush of puppy love.
I'm at a loss to explain why anyone thinks Matthew Perry should be headlining films in the first place. With a square head and severe shortage in the lips & chin department he seems custom made for the "best friend" role. I'm not stupid and know that the culture-piercing success of "Friends" has Everything to do with it. "Fools Rush In" is the exception to this and "Almost Heroes" the rule. Campbell is slightly better, but barely gives off any sparks in what should have been a role played as a firecracker. Of course her role suffers from being as underwritten as the rest of the script and creates the biggest hurdle the audience is asked overcome: buying her and Dylan McDermott's relationship.
Only in the trite universe that "Tango" exists in would these two characters become Rich Guy and Mistress. That's right, Campbell's not-really-struggling artist is the kept woman of a tycoon. Excuse me, Mr. Screenwriter, I am supposed to believe that underneath all those funky clothes beats the heart of woman who thinks a sugar daddy's boy toy is her best option?! As for as the comedic aspect of this purported romantic comedy, there's not a single line worth repeating in this whole shebang. Only, and I do stress only, if you are so desperate for a night out that involves seeing such a film (and this summer's Julia Roberts' twosome are no longer even playing at the dollar theater) then see this by-the-numbers effort.