1/10
Wow...this movie is REALLY awful
11 July 2005
Warning: Spoilers
I just saw this movie last night at a midnight sneak preview screening (I work for an independent theatre chain in Colorado - it's one of the perks)...I'm sorry, but this is one of THE WORST movies I've ever seen! I know that there are some Bruce Campbell fanatics out there who (like Star Wars die-hards) will string you up from the nearest tree if you DARE speak any ill of their beloved cinematic icon...nevertheless, Campbell-teers, this particular work from The Chin is a celluloid black hole.

Before you make any assumptions that I'm some hoity-toity film buff who only watches "real" movies like "Ladies in Lavender" and "Sideways", think again - I'm a huge fan of B-movies, and Bruce Campbell in particular. His trademark character Ash is one of my favorites, and his portrayal of the aging Elvis in Bubba Ho-Tep was phenomenal.

But hey, B-movies still have the potential to be reeeeally, reeeeally bad (and not in that "good" campy way we all love)...and that's what watching this particular one was like for me and my fellow co-workers. With the exception of that one tracking shot where Bruce runs through the square and scares the kids, there were no laughs to be had. Overall, we found the story to be mind-numbingly stoopid, the pacing mollasses-like, and the so-called humor dumber than a bag of hammers. (I'm sorry, but Ted Raimi's "Pavel" character was not comic relief...he was just plain retarded!) Believe me, we all went into this really wanting to like it, but left feeling incredibly disappointed and robbed of two hours.

If you absolutely loved this movie, plan to see it multiple times, want to marry and have kids with it, etc., that's fantastic - we all like what we like, so you get no judgement from me. But don't go questioning the sense of humor or fan loyalty of those who aren't having multiple orgasms over Campbell's latest cinematic coupe. This flick was a steaming turd sandwich in my humble opinion...and as a true Campbell fan, I'm allowed to say that!
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