I admit, I have a strange fondness for bad movies. Movies that are enjoyably bad, or movies that really aren't as bad as the critics/public insisted, though they're certainly not good.
However, there are some movies so irredeemably, stupefyingly, unimaginably bad that they don't even have the semi-out of being funny. "Megiddo" is one such movie.
I sat through it because I was bored and it was an exceedingly dismal night for TV. And even though I didn't pay to see it, I still want my money back. What a turkey.
The plot, if you can call it that, is a mishmash of rah-rah super-patriotism, shockingly blatant racism and xenophobia, paranoia, pseudo-Biblical gibberish, "Omen" ripoffs, "X-Files" ripoffs, "Exorcist" ripoffs, a pitiful love triangle, hideous acting, even more hideous dialog, and cut-rate special effects that offer a silly Satan who's about as frightening as a pair of bunny slippers -- as well as being shockingly stupid. I guess I'm just used to the idea of the devil being brilliant, but still...you'd think that old Scratch would at least be clever enough to deduce that one of his "allies," reluctant to start with, is going to back-stab him.
All this talk about Beelzebub, and no mention of the actor who plays him. It's Michael York, hammier than a pig farm. Many an actor has said that they prefer to play villains, as they're more fun than heroes, so you'd think that York would be having a blast playing the ultimate villain. However, his performance seems to strain him as much as it does the audience. Just like his computer-animated counterpart, who shows up at the very end, he isn't scary. He's just peevish and annoying.
Poor Michael Biehn (who hasn't aged well at all -- he used to be so cute) is stuck playing the good guy, York's "brother." I use quotes because I think that that the devil actually inhabits York's character when he's a child and uses him as a puppet, though I'm not sure...the movie is muddy on this point, as on so many others. Anyway, Biehn's performance mainly consists of looking constipated, barking out painfully stupid dialog, and clenching his jaw...perhaps to keep from dissolving into gales of laughter at the sheer absurdity of all that is going on around him. I suppose it is to his credit that he doesn't, in fact, collapse in hilarity; he must take his craft seriously, even when applying it to something this appalling.
However, there are some movies so irredeemably, stupefyingly, unimaginably bad that they don't even have the semi-out of being funny. "Megiddo" is one such movie.
I sat through it because I was bored and it was an exceedingly dismal night for TV. And even though I didn't pay to see it, I still want my money back. What a turkey.
The plot, if you can call it that, is a mishmash of rah-rah super-patriotism, shockingly blatant racism and xenophobia, paranoia, pseudo-Biblical gibberish, "Omen" ripoffs, "X-Files" ripoffs, "Exorcist" ripoffs, a pitiful love triangle, hideous acting, even more hideous dialog, and cut-rate special effects that offer a silly Satan who's about as frightening as a pair of bunny slippers -- as well as being shockingly stupid. I guess I'm just used to the idea of the devil being brilliant, but still...you'd think that old Scratch would at least be clever enough to deduce that one of his "allies," reluctant to start with, is going to back-stab him.
All this talk about Beelzebub, and no mention of the actor who plays him. It's Michael York, hammier than a pig farm. Many an actor has said that they prefer to play villains, as they're more fun than heroes, so you'd think that York would be having a blast playing the ultimate villain. However, his performance seems to strain him as much as it does the audience. Just like his computer-animated counterpart, who shows up at the very end, he isn't scary. He's just peevish and annoying.
Poor Michael Biehn (who hasn't aged well at all -- he used to be so cute) is stuck playing the good guy, York's "brother." I use quotes because I think that that the devil actually inhabits York's character when he's a child and uses him as a puppet, though I'm not sure...the movie is muddy on this point, as on so many others. Anyway, Biehn's performance mainly consists of looking constipated, barking out painfully stupid dialog, and clenching his jaw...perhaps to keep from dissolving into gales of laughter at the sheer absurdity of all that is going on around him. I suppose it is to his credit that he doesn't, in fact, collapse in hilarity; he must take his craft seriously, even when applying it to something this appalling.