1/10
Okay, NOW I get it......
7 May 2006
I watched this movie last night in a state of total confusion. The opening credits read "Directed by Eddie Romero" and some other guy and "Starring John Ashley and Angelique Pettyjohn" so like any devoted B movie fan I was expecting lots of fun Blood Island Hijinks. The movie starts and it feels like a Larry Buchanan epic on a (slightly) bigger budget, but minutes drag by with excruciating slowness and there's no sign of the putative stars. Next thing you know we're in Japan and some mad scientist is trying to create humanoid life from a Venus flytrap in a scene that looks like a cross between FRANKENSTEIN and THE MUTATIONS. And all to background music that sounds like it was swiped from a local kiddie show from the 1950s! And weirdest of all, with all these surreal goings on I'M STILL NOT HAVING ANY FUN!!!!! Thank god for the IMDb! All has been explained and my world makes sense (sort of) again. Exit Eddie Romero, enter Ed Wood, and leave all hope of quality behind. I'm hesitant to use a phrase like "worst movie of all time" but I believe I have finally found that elusive worst movie. No entertainment value, not even of the camp or inadvertent variety, just 90+ minutes of stultifying ineptitude. Okay, there's one scene where the scientist is apparently seeking the help of a group of female divers and all the girls standing around listening to his half assed theories are topless, so for a few brief moments there are some pretty cute boobies on display. That's the sole redeeming feature of this film, and believe me it's not enough.
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