Well, after creating an alien invasion in Independence Day and a giant monster in Godzilla, two things have become abundantly clear about writer/producer/director Roland Emmerich. He is very skilled at creating large-scale CGI spectacles, and he is the worst writer getting rich in Hollywood, today. It's hard to believe that this is the same mind that brought us the shallow, but very entertaining, Stargate. At least, in his previous projects, however, Emmerich was willing to lay out some cash to get his dumb lines delivered by professional stars with some skill and charisma. Not so here. The cast of 10,000 B.C. is largely made up of lost unknowns and untalented newcomers, with the exceptions of Cliff Curtis and narrator Omar Sharif (I've heard of him). The fitful acting is worsened by soap opera quality dialog and a story that belongs on Saturday morning cartoons. Even Emmerich's direction, which helped his earlier efforts seems tired and unimaginative, here. The manhattan Movie Maniac - Realmoviereview.com
The woeful, and historically-inaccurate, story (I won't even get started with that) of 10,000 B.C. starts out with a clan of mammoth hunters, living a Native-American inspired lifestyle. Their little world, which includes perfect use of all language concepts except contractions, is upset when a young, blue-eyed girl (Evolet) stumbles into their village and prompts their magical mystic ("Old mother" - that's original) to fire out a doom filled prophecy. Aren't all prophecies doom filled? When was the last time anyone made a prophesy something bland, but pleasant? Anyway, the prophecy prompts the village's main hunter, and holder of some ridiculously prominent white spear, to abandon his son, and his clan, to go...go...I don't really know why he left, but he left. Some kind of plan to stop the prophecy, I guess. At any rate, he leaves his son, D' Leh, who grows up, falls in love with Evolet and becomes a leader. His world is turned upside down when a group of technologically advanced raiders show up and take Evolet, and others, captive. Now, D'Leh and a few companions have to rescue them, which involves crossing the great mountains, meeting new groups, stopping for cappuccino, etc. Okay, I made up the last part, but if they had, it wouldn't have made the story much more ridiculous than it already is. The wonderful CGI effects in 10,000 B.C. could not save this sorry effort from the blunt force trauma of my keyboard. Imagine Apocalypto, crossed with Quest for Fire and mixed together with Stargate, and you have 10,000 B.C., which is nowhere near as good as any of those films (and I didn't even like Quest For Fire that much). The usual crowd of easily-pleased action fans will like this one, and spout off with usual "can't you just enjoy the movie" kind of defense, but others should stay away from the shrapnel of this bomb. The CGI animals are cool to watch and they entertained me in a Jurassic Park 2, kind of way for awhile, but there wasn't even enough of that, so I was left to endure a story that is on a par with the efforts of a motivated eighth grader, disappointing performances from a cast that may improve one day, but I doubt it, and action direction that had all the imagination of an infomercial. If you catch trailer for this one, you have seen the best it has to offer. It only gets worse from there. 10,000 B.C. is the first major cinematic disappointment of 2008.
The woeful, and historically-inaccurate, story (I won't even get started with that) of 10,000 B.C. starts out with a clan of mammoth hunters, living a Native-American inspired lifestyle. Their little world, which includes perfect use of all language concepts except contractions, is upset when a young, blue-eyed girl (Evolet) stumbles into their village and prompts their magical mystic ("Old mother" - that's original) to fire out a doom filled prophecy. Aren't all prophecies doom filled? When was the last time anyone made a prophesy something bland, but pleasant? Anyway, the prophecy prompts the village's main hunter, and holder of some ridiculously prominent white spear, to abandon his son, and his clan, to go...go...I don't really know why he left, but he left. Some kind of plan to stop the prophecy, I guess. At any rate, he leaves his son, D' Leh, who grows up, falls in love with Evolet and becomes a leader. His world is turned upside down when a group of technologically advanced raiders show up and take Evolet, and others, captive. Now, D'Leh and a few companions have to rescue them, which involves crossing the great mountains, meeting new groups, stopping for cappuccino, etc. Okay, I made up the last part, but if they had, it wouldn't have made the story much more ridiculous than it already is. The wonderful CGI effects in 10,000 B.C. could not save this sorry effort from the blunt force trauma of my keyboard. Imagine Apocalypto, crossed with Quest for Fire and mixed together with Stargate, and you have 10,000 B.C., which is nowhere near as good as any of those films (and I didn't even like Quest For Fire that much). The usual crowd of easily-pleased action fans will like this one, and spout off with usual "can't you just enjoy the movie" kind of defense, but others should stay away from the shrapnel of this bomb. The CGI animals are cool to watch and they entertained me in a Jurassic Park 2, kind of way for awhile, but there wasn't even enough of that, so I was left to endure a story that is on a par with the efforts of a motivated eighth grader, disappointing performances from a cast that may improve one day, but I doubt it, and action direction that had all the imagination of an infomercial. If you catch trailer for this one, you have seen the best it has to offer. It only gets worse from there. 10,000 B.C. is the first major cinematic disappointment of 2008.