5/10
Every Home has its Castle
7 September 2009
Yes, good old William Castle is on the loose again, with a low budget and a creepy plot...and Joan Crawford, whose salary probably used up most of Castle's available cash.

You know you're in trouble from the first few scenes, with corny eyeball-shaped framing devices, then the intrusion of Van Alexander's completely out-of-place bouncy score, with its recurring principal theme of "Ninny nanny noo-noo." (Most of his credits are for 60s sitcoms, and it shows.) Then we're treated to exteriors of the Mannering house which are nothing more than Thomas Kincade- style paintings. (Virtually the whole film was shot on a sound stage, except for some rear projections.)

The plot itself is clichéd, but decently "executed." The casting is a problem, with Joan Crawford at age 60 trying to be the hypotenuse in a love triangle between 50-year-old John Ireland and some young bimbo (or we should say, ex-bimbo). Not much choice there. The two teenage girls are straight out of 60s sitcom land, and the younger sister joins the ranks of "most annoying child actors." There are some tense moments, including a ripoff of the shower scene from "Psycho" (except with a naked man instead of Janet Leigh).

And since we're already knee-deep in 60s sitcoms with the trite score and giggly teenaged actors, we're given an ending that would have been right in place on Dobie Gillis or the Patty Duke Show. Except with a dead body.
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