Now let's blow off some steam with a goofy slasher movie parody, shall we? It says a lot about the subgenre that, even as early as 1981, writers and producers realized that slasher films were largely composed of a per-assembled selection of clichés and stereotypes. "Student Bodies" predates "Scream" and "Scary Movie" (And even "Bloody Movie" and "There's Nothing Out There") as picking out and making fun of the rules of the genre. Teenage males are always thinking about sex, no matter how incongruous the setting. The adults and authority figures are blazingly clueless and unhelpful. The killer, when not breathing heavily and monologing his ridiculous actions, kills people in the most absurd of ways. I mean, absurd even by the standards of a genre that includes Jason punching a dude's head off his shoulders. Virginal final girl Toby, along with her androgynous name, wears buttons that say "NO!" in big letters on her bra. When sleuthing through a file, like a final girl is prone to do, she comes upon a piece of paper that says "Look in the other draw!" Many of the gags brilliantly mock the genre. A flashing running tally appears on screen with every kill. Floating graphics and text point out suspects and foolish mistakes the characters have made. Any time a phone is picked up, we hear the killer's heavy breathing on the other end. The villain disguises his voice by talking through a rubber chicken. A meowing cat turns out to be a meowing (gassy) dog. The movie is set on Halloween, Friday the 13th, the night of the big game, big parade, and prom. (And, finally, the big funeral.) Surprisingly, some of the best gags in the movie have nothing to do with the horror genre. The oddball high school principal is prone to delivering lines like "All these years, I've secretly been naked underneath my clothes" or "Hasn't there been enough senseless killing? Let's have a murder that makes sense!" with a straight-face worthy of Leslie Nielson. The nutty psychologist takes a minute to rearrange all the items in his room before sitting down and saying "Someone's been in my office." The workshop teacher is obsessed with horse head bookends, the film's most goofy odd gag. The football game is played between a group of small children and giant black men. There's a draw full of marbles. The biggest laugh might come when the movie literally stops just so a censor can have a direct word with the audience. Many of the best gags belong to Malvert the Janitor, your typical red-herring oddball. This guy is inexplicable. He stands somewhere around 6'3, looks even taller because he's rail thin, has really long limps and hands, the loosest joints I've ever seen, and is played by an actor credited only as "The Stick." His overbearing weirdness sets up one of the best gags in the movie during the post-prom reveal. (To those who have seen the film: "Absurd!") Not all the gags land. The extended bits about gum and galoshes aren't very funny, neither is when the Breather interrupts the movie to give us a rundown on all the suspects. The reoccurring bits about an African exchange student are uncomfortably racist. The farting corpse gag is overdone. The movie can't sustain its comic momentum throughout the whole runtime. With about twenty minutes to go, the movie runs out of gags. The entire chainsaw sequence goes on for way too long. The movie gets weirdly serious at the end. I think it was attempting to slip into some type of surreal nightmare tone but it's played totally straight and jives badly with the rest of the film. The final sequence is also weirdly serious. Like a lot of gag based parodies, I suspect this would have worked better at only an hour long. "Student Bodies" feature absolutely no actors you've heard, though I do wonder what happened to adorable Kristen Riter. Fans of the genre or goofy eighties comedy should definitely check it out.
Review of Student Bodies
