Sweet Sixteen (1983)
7/10
Pretty solid horror mystery thriller
1 November 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Sassy teenager Melissa (a nicely brash portrayal by fetching brunette Aleisa Shirley) stirs things up in a sleepy small Texas town. After two boys with the hots for Melissa are murdered, both folksy sheriff Dan Burke (the always excellent Bo Hopkins) and his inquisitive wannabe Nancy Drew daughter Marci (an appealing portrayal by Dana Kimmell) decide to investigate.

Director Jim Sotos adroitly crafts a strong rural backwoods hamlet atmosphere, relates the engrossing story at a steady pace, and delivers a satisfying smidgen of mild splatter. While the strictly so-so script by Erwin Goldman provides a novel spin on slasher conventions by making horny dudes the key targets of the killer's wrath, the final explanation for the killer's bloodthirsty spree alas proves to be really far-fetched and thus dissatisfying. Fortunately, the fine cast of reliable pros keep this movie watchable: Susan Strasberg as Melissa's friendly mom Joanne, Patrick MacNee as Melissa's uptight archaeologist dad Dr. John Morgan, Don Stroud as rowdy hell-raiser Billy Franklin, Don Shanks as tough Indian Jason Longshadow, Steve Antin as the jocular Hank Burke, Sharon Farrell as perky forensics expert Kathy Hopkins, Logan Clarke as racist jerk Jimmy, Michael Pataki as smarmy politician George Martin, Henry Wilcoxon as aged Native American Greyfeather, and Larry Storch as a bartender. As a yummy bonus, the comely and slender Mrs. Shirley takes an utterly gratuitous, yet still much-appreciated shower and also goes skinny-dipping (don't worry folks, Shirley is clearly a good deal older than her underage character). Both James L. Carter's competent cinematography and Tommy Vig's shivery score are up to par. The less said about Melissa's hideously sappy theme song, the better. A rather flawed, but overall worthwhile picture.
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