Story 1 absolutely stinks, mainly because it's not rooted in any kind of reality: the blonde essentially attempts murder on her classmate during diving class, yet she doesn't even get admonished by "Coach", who also stupidly enough doesn't even try to prevent her from climbing the jumping board. (Goes without saying that nobody calls the cops to have the blonde arrested or at least interviewed, implying that this story is taking place on planet Zong.) Instead of showing at least slight remorse or fear for the girl's safety after she nearly drowns, the girls snicker like sociopaths. That's what I call over-over-overkill. Of stupid absurdity. Yes, Mr.Writer, blondie is baaaaad, we get it; no need to exaggerate her to the point of making her look like Stalin's niece.
When you conjure up characters and events that have pretty much zero connection with the real world then you don't get scares either, because the whole point of horror is to introduce bizarre, frightening events into a normal setting, a world that reminds you of your own. This drivel reminds me of nothing - except drivel. Or planet Zong.
The other reason the story stinks is the blonde's performance, which is schizophrenic to put it mildly: she shows great confidence in torturing her victim, yet bafflingly makes scared faces, then goes back to snickering like a demon - then back to looking scared of her victim! It is truly a characterization penned in a Hollywood sewer. Predictably, she gets killed off by the victim and the story ends fairly stupidly.
Story 2 starts off with yet another teacher-pupil relationship, which is in itself dumb because why the repetition? The story is muddled and silly, if somewhat original. But originality is a tricky beast, just like in music: you can create something new, yet fall flat on your face because you still have to execute it well and carry it through. An original premise simply isn't enough.
Story 3 features a demonic Easter Bunny who craps chickens out of its palm. I am clueless as to why it doesn't dump eggs instead, but who knows if these writers even know what Easter is. Most young kids today don't even know what World War 2 is, so why be surprised. A stupid, moronic conclusion to a typically underdeveloped story, typical for this movie.
Story 4 is really bad, and features yet another unnatural pregnancy, just as story 2, which means that whoever compiled these stories didn't give a rat's behind about repetition. This one makes zero sense, start to finish. A woman gets pregnant all the time, so a bunch of witches or whatever impregnate her (why?), only to find out that she's pregnant with a huge hand. Or an entire man? We don't find out, because that's the last scene. Embarrassing rubbish.
Story 5 has an original set-up, but yet again a total cop-out ending that not only doesn't explain anything, it doesn't even hint at what the hell's going on. Another fail.
Story 6 isn't horror at all, just a lame tortureporn comedy bit written/directed by a buffoon we all know as Kevin Smith. The story also features amateur acting, which isn't surprising considering he stuck his dumb daughter into this piece of crap. And, Kevin: why the hell would the guy cut off his own genital if given a knife? Wouldn't he use the knife to cut off the cable that is connected to his anus? Yes, Kevin Smith is a clod. That's why he's a liberal and why he's friends with Matt Demon and Benny Affleck.
Story 7 has a solid premise but the plot meanders aimlessly, leaving the viewer with yet another underdeveloped, pointless mess.
Story 8 has a twist you can see from a mile, hence it is also lame. The twist from story 7 is similar, so that's another example of the dumb order the stories were presented in.
When you conjure up characters and events that have pretty much zero connection with the real world then you don't get scares either, because the whole point of horror is to introduce bizarre, frightening events into a normal setting, a world that reminds you of your own. This drivel reminds me of nothing - except drivel. Or planet Zong.
The other reason the story stinks is the blonde's performance, which is schizophrenic to put it mildly: she shows great confidence in torturing her victim, yet bafflingly makes scared faces, then goes back to snickering like a demon - then back to looking scared of her victim! It is truly a characterization penned in a Hollywood sewer. Predictably, she gets killed off by the victim and the story ends fairly stupidly.
Story 2 starts off with yet another teacher-pupil relationship, which is in itself dumb because why the repetition? The story is muddled and silly, if somewhat original. But originality is a tricky beast, just like in music: you can create something new, yet fall flat on your face because you still have to execute it well and carry it through. An original premise simply isn't enough.
Story 3 features a demonic Easter Bunny who craps chickens out of its palm. I am clueless as to why it doesn't dump eggs instead, but who knows if these writers even know what Easter is. Most young kids today don't even know what World War 2 is, so why be surprised. A stupid, moronic conclusion to a typically underdeveloped story, typical for this movie.
Story 4 is really bad, and features yet another unnatural pregnancy, just as story 2, which means that whoever compiled these stories didn't give a rat's behind about repetition. This one makes zero sense, start to finish. A woman gets pregnant all the time, so a bunch of witches or whatever impregnate her (why?), only to find out that she's pregnant with a huge hand. Or an entire man? We don't find out, because that's the last scene. Embarrassing rubbish.
Story 5 has an original set-up, but yet again a total cop-out ending that not only doesn't explain anything, it doesn't even hint at what the hell's going on. Another fail.
Story 6 isn't horror at all, just a lame tortureporn comedy bit written/directed by a buffoon we all know as Kevin Smith. The story also features amateur acting, which isn't surprising considering he stuck his dumb daughter into this piece of crap. And, Kevin: why the hell would the guy cut off his own genital if given a knife? Wouldn't he use the knife to cut off the cable that is connected to his anus? Yes, Kevin Smith is a clod. That's why he's a liberal and why he's friends with Matt Demon and Benny Affleck.
Story 7 has a solid premise but the plot meanders aimlessly, leaving the viewer with yet another underdeveloped, pointless mess.
Story 8 has a twist you can see from a mile, hence it is also lame. The twist from story 7 is similar, so that's another example of the dumb order the stories were presented in.