One of the dirt-worst films I've seen in a long time. I thought this would be cheesy, tacky fun, but it was just bland, nonsensical and totally boring.
It avoids a 1 star rating, which I reserve for a special type of ineptitude, since it at least seems to know what it wants to be: a cliched fantasy adventure. And thus it shoe-horns in all the requisite elements, but with no care for storytelling, character development or drama.
The plot is that there are two warring clans fighting over a well. Into this situation walks (at a glacial pace that is supposed to convey quiet strength but just looks hammy) mercenary warrior the Dark One, played by Carradine. Battles ensue. At some point he discovers a bare-breasted woman in a dungeon who seems to have some importance but it isn't explained. Carradine's allegiance flip-flops as we cycle through the interminable action with no narrative thread in sight. An old man is introduced. Who is he? Who is anybody in this film? What are their motivations? Nobody in this film matters.
The only thing I enjoyed was William Marin as the grotesque, fat ruler Bal Caz. He played the role like Christopher Biggins would, coming off camp and pantomime-ish, but at least it was kind of fun. The character has a strange lizard-like companion and the pair are obviously a rip-off of Jabba the Hutt and Salacious Crumb. This film tries to steal liberally from the Star Wars trilogy, but falls flat on its face with its poor costuming and lack of vibrancy. It came out in 1984, but its washed-out palette and cheap sets make it look at least 10 years older.
Overall, this is a miserable waste of time. A dull and dingy effort. Avoid!
It avoids a 1 star rating, which I reserve for a special type of ineptitude, since it at least seems to know what it wants to be: a cliched fantasy adventure. And thus it shoe-horns in all the requisite elements, but with no care for storytelling, character development or drama.
The plot is that there are two warring clans fighting over a well. Into this situation walks (at a glacial pace that is supposed to convey quiet strength but just looks hammy) mercenary warrior the Dark One, played by Carradine. Battles ensue. At some point he discovers a bare-breasted woman in a dungeon who seems to have some importance but it isn't explained. Carradine's allegiance flip-flops as we cycle through the interminable action with no narrative thread in sight. An old man is introduced. Who is he? Who is anybody in this film? What are their motivations? Nobody in this film matters.
The only thing I enjoyed was William Marin as the grotesque, fat ruler Bal Caz. He played the role like Christopher Biggins would, coming off camp and pantomime-ish, but at least it was kind of fun. The character has a strange lizard-like companion and the pair are obviously a rip-off of Jabba the Hutt and Salacious Crumb. This film tries to steal liberally from the Star Wars trilogy, but falls flat on its face with its poor costuming and lack of vibrancy. It came out in 1984, but its washed-out palette and cheap sets make it look at least 10 years older.
Overall, this is a miserable waste of time. A dull and dingy effort. Avoid!