A 2022 six person space crew experience some malfunctions aboard their spaceship while on a space mission to fix satellites (or something) . Their ship is running out of air so of course they come across an abandoned lifeless spaceship that looks like the old spaceships from 1980. They board the ghost spaceship & someone remarks that it smells like sulfur & is very hot for a ship with no power. That was my clue one that the ghost ship would have some link to hell as the cause of its demise (ripoff Event Horizon much).
They find one dead guy, bring him aboard their ship & put his body in the med bay. The doctor examines the body & they discover that his belly is ripped open exposing his guts (ripoff Alien much).
The captain is seeking answers about the ghost ship & goes to the onboard computer for answers. Oh yeah, the onboard computer is a full sized anatomically correct woman that sits in an office chair in a broom closet & never gets up once during the entire movie. She tells the captain about the ghost ship & how it's from 30 years ago & it crashed out of space into the ocean & was lost. Blah blah blah & 30 seconds later, the captain miraculously links the ghost spaceship to the Bermuda Triangle. That's right, you heard me correctly - the Bermuda Triangle.
Apparently there's a portal/black hole/stairway to heaven that goes directly from the ocean through the air to space & then to hell (which conveniently is located on the dark side of the moon). Any object that gets caught in this portal/path is transported to hell aka the dark side of the moon.
The dead guy comes alive & the crew begin getting bumped off by Satan himself who takes over the body of whomever he kills & then goes off to kill the next one. Seems a bit petty of Satan to have to collect souls 1 by 1 like this but I guess the bad economy caused him to cutback on the Armageddon type big showcase gloom & doom everyone at once.
Aboard the ghost ship once again, a crew member falls into a room filled with water. It's seawater with algae & stuff. They wanted to make sure you understood that the spaceship had been in the ocean so that's how it got caught up in the Bermuda Triangle & transported back into space to hell aka the dark side of the moon.
After 3 crew members are killed, the remaining 3 crew members detach from & then blow up the ghost spaceship. Two kills later & it's down to just the captain who decides that he'll just blow up himself & Satan who's now taken over the last other crew member.
Boom bam boom! The End.
As end credits roll, you're given a glimpse of all the spaceships, boats, pirate boats, rockets, planes, trains, & automobiles that have fallen into the Bermuda space portal beam zone & ended up in hell aka the dark side of the moon. I think I even saw an ice cream truck surrounded by dinosaurs up there too.
Production Quality is Horrific: The spaceship's dining hall is literally the conference room of the film makers office. All the crew are sitting around what is clearly the table read table. The ship's bridge/control room is the size of the broom closet of the same building. The props & sets look exactly like painted styrofoam pieces.
I think they were going for an Alien, Event Horizon, Ghost Ship, Leviathan type movie but what they ended up with was comedic gold.
They find one dead guy, bring him aboard their ship & put his body in the med bay. The doctor examines the body & they discover that his belly is ripped open exposing his guts (ripoff Alien much).
The captain is seeking answers about the ghost ship & goes to the onboard computer for answers. Oh yeah, the onboard computer is a full sized anatomically correct woman that sits in an office chair in a broom closet & never gets up once during the entire movie. She tells the captain about the ghost ship & how it's from 30 years ago & it crashed out of space into the ocean & was lost. Blah blah blah & 30 seconds later, the captain miraculously links the ghost spaceship to the Bermuda Triangle. That's right, you heard me correctly - the Bermuda Triangle.
Apparently there's a portal/black hole/stairway to heaven that goes directly from the ocean through the air to space & then to hell (which conveniently is located on the dark side of the moon). Any object that gets caught in this portal/path is transported to hell aka the dark side of the moon.
The dead guy comes alive & the crew begin getting bumped off by Satan himself who takes over the body of whomever he kills & then goes off to kill the next one. Seems a bit petty of Satan to have to collect souls 1 by 1 like this but I guess the bad economy caused him to cutback on the Armageddon type big showcase gloom & doom everyone at once.
Aboard the ghost ship once again, a crew member falls into a room filled with water. It's seawater with algae & stuff. They wanted to make sure you understood that the spaceship had been in the ocean so that's how it got caught up in the Bermuda Triangle & transported back into space to hell aka the dark side of the moon.
After 3 crew members are killed, the remaining 3 crew members detach from & then blow up the ghost spaceship. Two kills later & it's down to just the captain who decides that he'll just blow up himself & Satan who's now taken over the last other crew member.
Boom bam boom! The End.
As end credits roll, you're given a glimpse of all the spaceships, boats, pirate boats, rockets, planes, trains, & automobiles that have fallen into the Bermuda space portal beam zone & ended up in hell aka the dark side of the moon. I think I even saw an ice cream truck surrounded by dinosaurs up there too.
Production Quality is Horrific: The spaceship's dining hall is literally the conference room of the film makers office. All the crew are sitting around what is clearly the table read table. The ship's bridge/control room is the size of the broom closet of the same building. The props & sets look exactly like painted styrofoam pieces.
I think they were going for an Alien, Event Horizon, Ghost Ship, Leviathan type movie but what they ended up with was comedic gold.