Review of Cow

Cow (I) (2021)
1/10
Fake reviews popped up like liberty caps in a cow patty
19 September 2022
Its unfortunate that this title didn't get more exposure because it does have its merit. While it is indeed a portrait of the daily lives of two cows, it has more value as the portrait of the daily lives of a cow farmer. Because, to be honest, cows are boring. But all the different aspects of cow farming are actually quite interesting. On YouTube there is a guy who makes vids showing how he fixes cows' hoofs, and he has amassed quite a following!

This film is being sold to the public as a documentary, but it is not a documentary. It is just a video recording of cows and cow farming. Documentaries have purpose... they at the very least have scripts. But this video has neither. Its just a bunch of random (and I mean VERY random) clips of cows on a cow farm, strung together with no narration, soundtrack, or anything. (Though there is a scene where the cows make whoopee and some fireworks are included with some uplifting music... nice touch!).

The people commenting that it is so sad, or so uplifting, or so groundbreaking, or whatever.... clearly they have never been to a cow farm, or simply been around cows for just a few minutes. There is absolutely nothing sad about this film. There is a scene with a dead cow on the ground and some construction vehicles in the background.... that's it. There is no music or narration, so there is nothing to be sad about..... what, a dead cow is sad? Scenes that could have made an emotional connection with the audience are lost to either the inexperience of the filmmakers or they simply did not care to showcase anything interesting..... such as when the cows can be seen in front of the starry sky.... why is that scene only 10 seconds long?!

One thing I can say about this video..... it shows that cows have personality. They are not just lifeless beings staring blankly into the air and mooing about like a cow being herded on a... ummm.... nevermind. That idea was lost on the filmmakers too, because no emotions are portrayed. The workers treat the cows like cattle on a farm. The cameramen treat the cows like cattle on a farm (to the dismay of the cow being tortured by the presence of a camera directly in her face right after she gave birth.... she moos "leave me alone" incessantly for the 5 freaking minutes that the camera states at her).

Overall this film feels like someone on the farm bought a camera, and just turned it on randomly throughout the life of the cows. That's it. Its cow farming, no more no less.

But I happen to find cow farming interesting, so I watched this film all the way through.

People, please stop artificially inflating the rating.... this is not a 7 star film. Its 4 or 5 at the most. But I'm forced to give it a 1 to try and balance things out.
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