3/10
Uncanny
13 January 2023
Warning: Spoilers
It's rather odd to say, but while there are certainly other bad Godzilla movies, this is the only one I can honestly call boring. Whether you watch the Japanese or American versions, you're in for a rough time. Both are boring. The American version at least has amusing dialogue, "Banana oil!", plus hearing Yogi Bear in a Godzilla movie is absolutely surreal, but all this does little to help. As for the Japanese version, it's way less chaotic, refers the monsters names correctly, Godzilla has his own roar throughout, and lacks the annoying narration of the lead character. However, it drags way more, and there's long long instances of just absolute silence. It was definitely too rushed, which is a mistake many sequels make. There is positive here though, keeping it from being terrible. For one, fan favorite Anguirus makes his debut, and his battles with Godzilla are certainly fun to watch. As the first Kaiju battle, it's clear to see how they evolved over time. Future fights would be far more coordinated and had monsters showing actual personalities. Here, the fight feels far more like two actual animals fighting for supremacy, which is very different and interesting. I honestly enjoy that aspect of it. I also give points for coming up with a unique cool way to dispose of Godzilla. And even the human drama has some merit at times.......it just takes too long to get to the good moments that when they arrive, you don't really feel anything. Kobayashi's sacrifice bringing the defeat of Godzilla is a mirror of Serizawa in the first movie, but because these characters just don't click like the first movie's characters, it doesn't have the same impactful blow when it happens.

All fans should at least see it once. But definitely don't use it if you're trying to get a friend into Godzilla movies

--Wes Wall.
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