What is there to say about this film that hasn't been said already.
It's a complete waste of time. It's a sensory mess. I can see that there are some excellent technical aspects to it, but they don't come close to making this a decent film.
I'll start with the good. There are 4 or 5 very beautiful shots. The special effects for it's time are unparalleled, to be sure.
That's about all I can really give it credit for.
Those 4 or 5 beautiful shots are milked TO THE EXTREME. We're talking something that could have been a minute long shot, and would have been perfect, is dragged on for 10-15minutes just so Kubrick could show off his work. It's pretentious on a level that I've never even experienced before.
The first few minutes of the movie are just black. So obviously you skip ahead. Then it isn't really any better because it's just sunrises and scenery until you get to watch some unconvincing ape-suit actors do almost nothing for 20 minutes. They find a monolith and that apparently causes them to evolve, meaning they begin using tools. (bones as weapons) I should have known by this awful opening sequence that I should have turned it off, but I am a huge sci-fi lover and professional sci-fi artist so I wanted to actually get to the good stuff and maybe be inspired in some way. I foolishly waited it out. I guess it's April fools today so the joke was definitely on me.
Then we get to some admittedly beautiful shots, that go on for far too long. They're just spacecrafts moving about and docking. Ok cool setup. Time for some action and an interesting story, right? Wrong.
A few scenes where some doctors talk to each other on the spacecraft. No meaningful dialogue whatsoever. It's along the lines of "oh how was your trip." "good." "how's doctor so and so" "he's good but he's busy" "oh ok give him my regards" "does anyone want a drink?" "no I'm good thanks" More shots of spacecrafts. More scenes of people talking about nothing.
Ok cool, now the monolith is on the moon. Maybe we are getting somewhere? The doctors did say they were hiding something from the public. Do I smell a plot forming? Oh.. I guess not. Nothing ever really comes of that.
Then it's a few astronauts on a spacecraft and it shows them eat and exercise and talk about boring stuff for awhile. There is a computer that runs the ship that they also talk to sometimes. They don't trust the computer and it gets paranoid.
Aaaaand intermission.
Maybe it gets better in the second half? -_-
WOW something actually happened. One of the astronauts dies because the computer is going crazy!! The most action we've seen all movie. Except all it shows is him flying through space with his oxygen not attached anymore. That's the most action in the entire movie.
The next 10 minutes are the other astronaut retrieving his body using a pod.
So obviously the other astronaut suspects the computer that was going insane and he goes to disable it. This takes him like 20 minutes, during which he just breathes into the mic the entire time and moves at a snail's pace. The computer repeats the same couple phrases over and over saying stuff like "no please" "don't do this" "I don't want to die" womp womp womp.
Very annoying voice. Slow and monotoned like everyone else in the film. It made me wonder if this film would be better if watched at double speed. I spent a good 15 minutes daydreaming about that while nothing happened on screen.
Then it basically just does some random winamp visualizer stuff for the next 20 minutes and occasionally flashes the face of the surviving astronaut.
To close the film out we see the astronaut has aged rapidly and is on another planet in a very Queen Anne style room. People say this part is him being studied by aliens or some crap but there's definitely no evidence of that whatsoever. Maybe it said that in the book or something, or maybe people just began to daydream and make up their own plot because this one sucks so hard. Then he's lying in bed and the monolith appears in his room. Next shot he's a baby floating in space with an overused classical piece playing. Roll credits.
So one of the absolute worst parts of this film is the sound. It's always either too quiet or too loud. The best sequences are when it's classical music and nothing else, but even that is just boring and overdone. Maybe for it's time it was pretty cool, but it doesn't hold up well. The worst parts BY FAR soundwise is that there's a solid 45-55 minutes of near silence except for someone breathing into the mic. I watched a good portion of this movie on mute because I was tired of plugging my ears. It's that awful. If you have even mild misophonia, or sensory issues, you'll want to avoid this movie.
Honestly, I wanted to give a couple stars because the beautiful scenes are REALLY gorgeous, and ahead of their time, truly, but I just can't, because they're ruined by being dragged on for far too long. Plus with an extremely awful plotline, horrible acting, and the worst sound mixing I've ever come across, I can't give it more than 1 star and sleep tonight.
I am truly SHOCKED that this has such high reviews. This is exactly why I usually avoid over-hyped movies. It's honestly such a slap in the face.
It's a complete waste of time. It's a sensory mess. I can see that there are some excellent technical aspects to it, but they don't come close to making this a decent film.
I'll start with the good. There are 4 or 5 very beautiful shots. The special effects for it's time are unparalleled, to be sure.
That's about all I can really give it credit for.
Those 4 or 5 beautiful shots are milked TO THE EXTREME. We're talking something that could have been a minute long shot, and would have been perfect, is dragged on for 10-15minutes just so Kubrick could show off his work. It's pretentious on a level that I've never even experienced before.
The first few minutes of the movie are just black. So obviously you skip ahead. Then it isn't really any better because it's just sunrises and scenery until you get to watch some unconvincing ape-suit actors do almost nothing for 20 minutes. They find a monolith and that apparently causes them to evolve, meaning they begin using tools. (bones as weapons) I should have known by this awful opening sequence that I should have turned it off, but I am a huge sci-fi lover and professional sci-fi artist so I wanted to actually get to the good stuff and maybe be inspired in some way. I foolishly waited it out. I guess it's April fools today so the joke was definitely on me.
Then we get to some admittedly beautiful shots, that go on for far too long. They're just spacecrafts moving about and docking. Ok cool setup. Time for some action and an interesting story, right? Wrong.
A few scenes where some doctors talk to each other on the spacecraft. No meaningful dialogue whatsoever. It's along the lines of "oh how was your trip." "good." "how's doctor so and so" "he's good but he's busy" "oh ok give him my regards" "does anyone want a drink?" "no I'm good thanks" More shots of spacecrafts. More scenes of people talking about nothing.
Ok cool, now the monolith is on the moon. Maybe we are getting somewhere? The doctors did say they were hiding something from the public. Do I smell a plot forming? Oh.. I guess not. Nothing ever really comes of that.
Then it's a few astronauts on a spacecraft and it shows them eat and exercise and talk about boring stuff for awhile. There is a computer that runs the ship that they also talk to sometimes. They don't trust the computer and it gets paranoid.
Aaaaand intermission.
Maybe it gets better in the second half? -_-
WOW something actually happened. One of the astronauts dies because the computer is going crazy!! The most action we've seen all movie. Except all it shows is him flying through space with his oxygen not attached anymore. That's the most action in the entire movie.
The next 10 minutes are the other astronaut retrieving his body using a pod.
So obviously the other astronaut suspects the computer that was going insane and he goes to disable it. This takes him like 20 minutes, during which he just breathes into the mic the entire time and moves at a snail's pace. The computer repeats the same couple phrases over and over saying stuff like "no please" "don't do this" "I don't want to die" womp womp womp.
Very annoying voice. Slow and monotoned like everyone else in the film. It made me wonder if this film would be better if watched at double speed. I spent a good 15 minutes daydreaming about that while nothing happened on screen.
Then it basically just does some random winamp visualizer stuff for the next 20 minutes and occasionally flashes the face of the surviving astronaut.
To close the film out we see the astronaut has aged rapidly and is on another planet in a very Queen Anne style room. People say this part is him being studied by aliens or some crap but there's definitely no evidence of that whatsoever. Maybe it said that in the book or something, or maybe people just began to daydream and make up their own plot because this one sucks so hard. Then he's lying in bed and the monolith appears in his room. Next shot he's a baby floating in space with an overused classical piece playing. Roll credits.
So one of the absolute worst parts of this film is the sound. It's always either too quiet or too loud. The best sequences are when it's classical music and nothing else, but even that is just boring and overdone. Maybe for it's time it was pretty cool, but it doesn't hold up well. The worst parts BY FAR soundwise is that there's a solid 45-55 minutes of near silence except for someone breathing into the mic. I watched a good portion of this movie on mute because I was tired of plugging my ears. It's that awful. If you have even mild misophonia, or sensory issues, you'll want to avoid this movie.
Honestly, I wanted to give a couple stars because the beautiful scenes are REALLY gorgeous, and ahead of their time, truly, but I just can't, because they're ruined by being dragged on for far too long. Plus with an extremely awful plotline, horrible acting, and the worst sound mixing I've ever come across, I can't give it more than 1 star and sleep tonight.
I am truly SHOCKED that this has such high reviews. This is exactly why I usually avoid over-hyped movies. It's honestly such a slap in the face.