5/10
A bizarre movie
2 August 2023
So there's probably no chance at all anyone would know about this movie if it hadn't starred Daniel Day-Lewis. Even with Day-Lewis in the lead role, it's still super obscure, and it honestly doesn't surprise me that this isn't well-known. That being said, it's so odd that I think it almost qualifies as something that deserves cult status... but I do have to emphasize the "almost" there, because it's pretty boring in parts, and definitely not a riot from start to finish.

But it is odd in a compelling way, and though I think it was supposed to be a comedy, I'm not sure it was always funny for the reasons it wanted to be. Plot-wise, it concerns a very "passionate" dentist riding across Argentina on a motorcycle, generally yelling at people who don't look after their teeth while ranting about cavities. Day-Lewis commits as he always does, and when his performance is coupled with the odd screenplay, the results are uncomfortable, confusing, and sometimes hilarious.

The dialogue needs to be heard to be believed, but some highlights include Day-Lewis saying things like:

  • "Ignorance is not the enemy. Tooth decay is the enemy."
  • "I had a wonderful dream... Everybody had their teeth removed."
  • "The lord made tooth decay, but he also made dentists like me."
  • "The world is collapsing outside, and I have an erection."


The whole thing is kind of unhinged, and though there are some really slow moments, it might be almost worth slogging through to uncover some of the particularly funny (and strange) moments. Eversmile New Jersey is probably Day-Lewis's weirdest film, and I'm sure he's happy that it's also probably his most obscure (but here I am, doing my part to unearth it and the bizarre stuff it contains within).
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